Republicans claim to fear left-wing authoritarianism -- but there's no such thing

[forgotmylogin]

1. (A loud crash as Left Wing Authoritarians burst into a dwelling in Kentucky)

LEADER: ALL RIGHT. All of you Magats line up! Doesn't need to be by gender or status, just form a general line..."
"We got lots of plans for you! First we're going to make sure your standard of healthcare matches everyone so you have equal access if you get sick! DON'T SMIRK! Then we're going to make sure all your roads are good and infrastructure works for you! Don't worry, the money will be coming from those billionaires up the road as you already pay your fair share of taxes based on your income."
"And you ladies...and those identifying as female or even non-binary...DO WE HAVE PLANS FOR YOU! You're going to have equal access to jobs, healthcare, family planning, and social services that men get, NO QUESTIONS ASKED."
"Oh, we've got a runner! One of them is making a break for it! No, Karen, we're not going to shoot at them, we've got a group of psychological counselors outside who will form a 'Love-Chain" to stop them from running and then they will help them through their anxiety and stress."
"You didn't expect all this, well NOBODY EXPECTS THE LIBERAL AUTHORITARIAN TAKEOVER! ...well...yeah, Fox News probably warned you, but we've got Hannity on his way to a re-education facility. No, it's very nice, it's a night class two days a week and they get gym and cafeteria privileges and there are sing-a-longs...paid for by his health insurance."
"Now, are all of you registered to vote? You still get to vote. What do you mean you didn't register at the DMV? Too long of a line? Lisa, please bring me the voter registration forms!"

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