This 830-million-year-old crystal might contain life. And we're about to open it.

[ret5hd]

9. OK...elevator pitch: "Trumpomedra Strain"...or

“DeSantis Zone”.

Either way, it’s a virus that:

1) if you’re white you turn Black
2) if you’re straight you turn gay
3) there’s a vaccine, but a lot of us aren’t that worried about it…our houses are neater, our wardrobes are better, and our taste in music just made a quantum jump.
4) TX, OK, FL, etc governors enforce the tightest lockdown in the world, etc

What do you think? Better than Sharknado?