If you missed it, FG response to Dearie

[jmowreader]

30. We had a guy at Fort Campbell who was kinda like that

We used to have these barracks searches called Health and Welfare Inspections in the 101st Airborne. This one turned into the most epic Article 15 ever handed down in the history of the division.

I was in the 311th Military Intelligence Battalion which had four companies: Headquarters, Headquarters and Operations Company which had the signals intelligence analysis center, the Operations Security Platoon (I was in this one), the Image Interpretation Platoon, a couple other platoons I don't remember, and the battalion headquarters. Alpha Company was the signals intercept company. Bravo Company was the Ground Surveillance Radar company, which was basically infantry with radars. Charlie Company was our service company and held the motor pool, the electronics maintenance platoon and the mess hall. This guy was a GSR operator in Bravo Company.

This guy had some marijuana in his room. The Army was less strict with marijuana than it is now, so he was looking at loss of a week's pay and restriction to post for two weeks. Not a huge punishment. His squad leader did the search, the squad leader found the weed, the squad leader turned in weed and referred him to the CO for disciplinary action.

Comes the day of the Article 15 hearing. His squad leader, platoon sergeant, platoon leader and the first sergeant were all in the CO's office when this guy reports for his hearing. The CO picks up the form and begins to read.

"Private so-and-so, I am considering punishing you under the provisions of Article 15, Uniform Code of Military Justice, for the offense of possessing two marijuana cigarettes in violation of Article 112a of the Uniform Code of Military Justice."

Oh shit.

This guy just went the fuck off. "Sir, I had a whole lid of weed. That motherfucker stole my dope!"

I don't know how many years that motherfucker got, but false official statements and tampering with evidence are far more serious offenses in the military than possessing either two joints or a whole lid of weed was.