Brave Sir Allen West (R-Lame Duckville/Crazytown), bless his little war criminal heart.

[Tommy_Carcetti]

29. The story behind "Brave Sir Allen":

In 2010, Allen West was elected as Representative for Florida House District 22, which was pretty much a 50/50 split district between Democrats and Republicans. Notably, it was not the district where Allen West actually resides (his congressional representative would ironically be Debbie Wasserman-Schultz, his apparent arch-nemisis by his own doing.)

Subsequent to his election, there was a rediscricting, and District 22 went from an even split to one that slightly favored Democrats. However, with that being said, an incumbent Republican with a record of acting in a sane, rational manner could likely still stand a decent chance at re-election thanks to the power of the incumbency.

Unfortunately for Allen West he had no record of acting in a sane, rational manner. In fact, he had very little record at all.

So sensing inevitable defeat, Allen West high-tailed it out of District 22 and sought re-election in District 18 instead, a newly drawn district that favored Republicans, albeit not necessarily overwhelmingly. The thought was it was friendlier turf and that he would stand a better chance at being elected there than in District 22.

Obviously, that did not work out so hot for him.

However, the mere fact that a man who believes it necessary to mention his "22 years of military service" at ever possible moment (nothwithstanding the fact that his 22 years of military service ended in disgrace for engaging in a mock execution of an unarmed detainee) would be so scared of running for re-election in his own district that he ran away to a district that he thought he could win. And that reminded me of the "Brave Sir Robin" character from Monty Python, whose reaction to any dangerous was to "run away!"

Hence, the Brave Sir Allen song:

Brave Sir Allen ran away.
Bravely ran away, away!
When danger reared its ugly head,
He bravely turned his tail and fled.
Yes, brave Sir Allen turned about
And gallantly he chickened out.
Bravely taking to his feet
He beat a very brave retreat,
Bravest of the brave, Sir Allen!

That being said, having lost the race and two recounts and yet unwilling to concede defeat, I believe he now reminds me more of the Black Knight in Monty Python instead:



"Tis but a scratch! A flesh wound!"