General Discussion

stevenleser

(32,886 posts)

184. I really dont know what its about. On the one hand, at least half seem to be low post newbies who I

Sat Dec 1, 2012, 01:04 PM

Dec 2012

suspect are doing it just to sow the seeds of division here. (I'm talking about the OPs, not necessarily the commenters)

I don't view their efforts as worthy of discussion hence my reasoning for not replying much to any of the OPs. I never had the talk about sex or consent from my parents other than a one sentence "Don't get anybody pregnant". I assumed that meant before I got married. At least I hope so since I do have a daughter from my first marriage.

Despite never having had the talk with my parents, I never had a problem understanding 'No'. For me, and I am sure any of the vast majority of us men and women who have only had sex with enthusiastic partners, the prospect of being inside or being penetrated by someone reviled by the experience is a turnoff to the point of being retch inducing.

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All this talk about rape is making me... [View all] Whiskeytide Nov 2012 OP

Wordiest rape apology OP evah! n/t leftstreet Nov 2012 #1

I said I was a lawyer... Whiskeytide Nov 2012 #3

what kind of client did you defend? Whisp Nov 2012 #7

Was? morningfog Nov 2012 #111

You said a lot of things. Iggo Dec 2012 #165

Yep. This is getting beyond bizarre. n/t demmiblue Nov 2012 #12

It is amazing how much time and energy is devoted to it. nt redqueen Nov 2012 #23

+1000. nt Mojorabbit Nov 2012 #85

just so you are aware, I know what you are doing. Whisp Nov 2012 #2

What is it about 400-500 post users coming out of the wood-work all of a sudden? LAGC Nov 2012 #5

It's an attempt to delegitimize the issue... YoungDemCA Nov 2012 #8

+1 redqueen Nov 2012 #24

+2 Squinch Nov 2012 #33

You bet it is. Talk about projection. WCLinolVir Dec 2012 #127

I thought it was creepy... CoffeeCat Dec 2012 #156

We're coming up on winter break. Starry Messenger Nov 2012 #15

Misogynist trolls working together to try to weaken women's progress kestrel91316 Nov 2012 #32

yup. and the fucker has so little respect for women, women that have been raped, he seabeyond Nov 2012 #34

It was a weird OP, to say the least! n/t RKP5637 Nov 2012 #77

a man feeling belittled so many men and women standing up for rape victims. he is doing his jab seabeyond Nov 2012 #78

Any form of coercion crosses the line YoungDemCA Nov 2012 #4

I like your use of the term coercion... Whiskeytide Nov 2012 #6

But he did raise one issue that I've wondered about, too. pnwmom Dec 2012 #211

Well. FightForMichigan Nov 2012 #9

That was good arely staircase Nov 2012 #20

Thank you so much for taking the time to write such a thoughtful, LisaLynne Nov 2012 #49

Thank you for this excellent and thorough response! n/t Ms. Toad Nov 2012 #83

That was great. Luminous Animal Dec 2012 #125

Great comments. lunatica Dec 2012 #185

ugh. another clueless man. cali Nov 2012 #10

He's not clueless. He's wilfully obtuse, and a raging sexist pig IMHO. kestrel91316 Nov 2012 #35

he is smeering the offensiveness of rape in victims face. this person needs to delete or seabeyond Nov 2012 #37

I'd bet serious money that they are sockpuppets of the same RL person, and that that person kestrel91316 Nov 2012 #45

they are probably pissed off men because some sexist got TOS. or a sock or whatever seabeyond Nov 2012 #54

I thought the same. Squinch Nov 2012 #55

You would lose the bet on all counts. Whiskeytide Nov 2012 #90

well, golly gee, been talking about education for a good 24 hours without it sounding like seabeyond Nov 2012 #95

Rape apologists are always mysogynists. By definition. kestrel91316 Dec 2012 #190

He goes on at length to "validate" a "grey area". Perp talk. WCLinolVir Dec 2012 #132

Sounds exactly like the NAMBLA crowd trying to justify pedophilia. kestrel91316 Dec 2012 #191

OK, let me demolish some of your points DonCoquixote Nov 2012 #11

Japan does not have " one of the LOWEST sufrommich Nov 2012 #19

THANK YOU! nt redqueen Nov 2012 #30

Ummm, yes it does. Statistics prove it. Bonobo Dec 2012 #232

Enough with this idea that boys need to be told rape is wrong Dokkie Dec 2012 #134

The ONLY acceptable sex is adult consensual sex. Period. lunatica Nov 2012 #13

I think that *anyone* who tries to if-and-or-but your statement is either LanternWaste Nov 2012 #21

I agree with that as a gold standard. Whiskeytide Nov 2012 #88

seriously? you have kids. you have yet to find a way to clealy teach you children the proper seabeyond Nov 2012 #99

that being said, I am ASTONISHED that so many "adults" cannot decipher such simple moral issues. alp227 Nov 2012 #101

What is the difference between... Lightbulb_on Nov 2012 #27

The difference is clear. One changes one's OWN mind... redqueen Nov 2012 #38

How come you didn't weigh in on my OP? Fumesucker Nov 2012 #50

if rape was more common among men than it already was, we would not have these roguevalley Dec 2012 #200

Seriously. Jesus fuck. No means no and if you have to ask, then ASK. Shibby2002 Jan 2013 #235

Cheap, disingenuous argument Shibby2002 Jan 2013 #234

Lol.....yep. cliffordu Nov 2012 #86

Is that different than coercion? cliffordu Nov 2012 #93

what about it? nt seabeyond Nov 2012 #96

Fucking sick. Sick and idiotic. redqueen Nov 2012 #103

So I guess Zombie Woof is all out of the question, then...... cliffordu Dec 2012 #154

With that definition you've made many more women rapists mathematic Dec 2012 #155

What a surprise to see you stating this obamanut2012 Nov 2012 #44

I'm sorry... Lightbulb_on Nov 2012 #48

Common sense and its application in any given situation, I would think. LanternWaste Nov 2012 #64

Common sense isn't as common as I would like... Lightbulb_on Nov 2012 #68

It's never failed me in these types of situations. LanternWaste Nov 2012 #84

They imply... I infer... Lightbulb_on Nov 2012 #94

One *does not* equal the other. nomorenomore08 Dec 2012 #160

It can't be "codified into law" necessarily. nomorenomore08 Dec 2012 #158

When a girl gives into a petulant boy because he has worn her down lunatica Dec 2012 #186

Where does prostitution fit into this? dkf Dec 2012 #229

You answer that question for yourself lunatica Dec 2012 #230

I agree with your statement. There is no wiggle room here to me. hrmjustin Nov 2012 #60

And if both were conscious but drunk, and not capable of giving consent, pnwmom Dec 2012 #212

Does the word consensual confuse you? lunatica Dec 2012 #223

Yes, I guess it does. I've told my sons that if a woman is drunk, she can't give consent. Period. pnwmom Dec 2012 #224

So... it's not rape if you coerced her by being utterly and insanely relentless? Chorophyll Nov 2012 #14

Our culture is deeply sick when it comes to sex/power/rape, IMO. closeupready Nov 2012 #16

And imagine if gay, when young someone tried to drag me out of a bar once. I'm not RKP5637 Nov 2012 #79

I can indeed imagine, though it never happened to me. closeupready Dec 2012 #135

If a gay man asks you for sex, and you say no...then what? (nt) The Straight Story Nov 2012 #17

Then he (the gay man) should probably stop asking. Same goes for heterosexuals. nomorenomore08 Dec 2012 #161

The rape fantasy. lightcameron Nov 2012 #18

People also read about war and cannibalism and murder, but seldom aspire to do it. nolabear Nov 2012 #39

Right, because it's fantasy. LisaLynne Nov 2012 #52

Women do not fantasize about getting raped -- ever obamanut2012 Nov 2012 #120

Um, yes, some do. LisaLynne Dec 2012 #124

Um no, they don't obamanut2012 Dec 2012 #128

Did you look at the links? nt LisaLynne Dec 2012 #131

Uh, is it really rape if you are in control of the fantasy? WCLinolVir Dec 2012 #129

Um that was my point. nt. LisaLynne Dec 2012 #130

but, that is really a very good point and interesting. i like how obama did that. seabeyond Dec 2012 #133

Sorry -- misread your post! LisaLynne Dec 2012 #137

yes. but this is thinking outside the box. seabeyond Dec 2012 #138

Yes, me too LisaLynne Dec 2012 #140

excellent. a fun part of the thread seabeyond Dec 2012 #142

This message was self-deleted by its author seaglass Dec 2012 #179

Do people at a Murder Mystery Party want to be murdered? obamanut2012 Dec 2012 #167

except only when and where they want to... AND how. seabeyond Dec 2012 #170

I thought that was an interesing comment obamanut2012 Dec 2012 #173

yup. and it also put a different slant on the bdsm seabeyond Dec 2012 #174

right! obamanut2012 Dec 2012 #175

I used to date a girl that was into it. Democracyinkind Dec 2012 #213

I suspect your experience is the norm obamanut2012 Dec 2012 #219

well. If women want to be raped as so many imply, then men must want to as well. roguevalley Dec 2012 #201

sorry...to say. some do. alphafemale Dec 2012 #164

No, they do not, no matter how many posters say they do obamanut2012 Dec 2012 #168

You call taken a term alphafemale Dec 2012 #171

That obviously isn't my term obamanut2012 Dec 2012 #172

that would have been in the 70's and 80's known as the bodice ripper. but, then, if you look at the seabeyond Dec 2012 #169

Juror #5 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE and said: L0oniX Nov 2012 #61

At the thrift store I work at I would say about half of the romance novels we have... Odin2005 Dec 2012 #147

This is some sick shit. redqueen Nov 2012 #22

what is your intent for excusing, validating, justifying rape? nt seabeyond Nov 2012 #25

please be man enough to self delete your post. from the title on, it is offensive. seabeyond Nov 2012 #26

Can you believe this shit is still being spewed forth? Rex Nov 2012 #29

fuckin start, all this talk about rape..... that is fuckin sick. and clear what a perverts seabeyond Nov 2012 #31

This is the first I've seen people try and defend Rex Nov 2012 #40

Oh? redqueen Nov 2012 #43

There isn't anything in this OP We haven't seen on DU before bettyellen Nov 2012 #74

the title is the creep all of any title i have seen. says a hell of a lot about the poster, seabeyond Nov 2012 #76

Interesting. The title doesn't bother me but I do think bettyellen Nov 2012 #82

true that seabeyond Nov 2012 #87

I'm hugely offended that jurors are leaving these vile posts TorchTheWitch Dec 2012 #148

I'm sorry I can't pretend there was anything new or special in that post bettyellen Dec 2012 #150

on another post someone made some remark about taking back this shit and making roguevalley Dec 2012 #202

bigotry in all forms is a TOS violation TorchTheWitch Dec 2012 #144

I read that Skinner was alerted on the rapist confession and let it stand. bettyellen Dec 2012 #153

The post I am referring to is the one you decided not to read. Rex Dec 2012 #188

Yep. My thoughts exactly. Squinch Nov 2012 #41

so fuckin in your face, if you are a rape victim, the pig slaps you up across the head seabeyond Nov 2012 #42

Worse than smacking you across the head, he is saying, "was it really rape?" Squinch Nov 2012 #51

cowards. all of them. and so much to play with the OP to offend all. but, wtf.... nt seabeyond Nov 2012 #58

men don't have to face this threat all the time. They don't have to think about their roguevalley Dec 2012 #203

Agreed! hrmjustin Nov 2012 #62

It is beyond mercuryblues Nov 2012 #46

and lets pity their sons. because people with these attitudes have a fucked up life. and that is seabeyond Nov 2012 #67

Actually mercuryblues Nov 2012 #69

yup. image these men as parents that cannot tell the difference between rape, and not rape. sad seabeyond Nov 2012 #70

There is so much failsauce in this OP. that I won't be Rex Nov 2012 #28

No, they don't. LisaLynne Nov 2012 #53

Serious question, and I want a serious answer. What if it was happening to you? nolabear Nov 2012 #36

Great questions Tsiyu Nov 2012 #47

Special Snowflakes indeed Tree-Hugger Nov 2012 #59

Thanks Tree-Hugger Tsiyu Nov 2012 #63

Lack of consent is not consent. Coercion to force sex is rape. Rape is fucking rape. STOP. rDigital Nov 2012 #56

Tell you what, why don't you ask Dan Savage what he would thinks graham4anything Nov 2012 #57

Looks like a hit and run poster. What exactly is "all this talk about rape".... boston bean Nov 2012 #65

Is this the only way you can get any DevonRex Nov 2012 #66

well played. FightForMichigan Nov 2012 #81

Thank you. I think it was a well-deserved volley. Nt DevonRex Nov 2012 #102

What a dipshit! UtahLib Dec 2012 #146

Yup. DevonRex Dec 2012 #149

In court, in support of child victims, I've heard defense attorneys raise some of these points. JohnnyLib2 Nov 2012 #71

Gack. Solly Mack Nov 2012 #72

yup. cowards that dont know rape. seems like the picture was right on. nt seabeyond Nov 2012 #73

Evidently, more than just 14, 15, 16 and 17 year old children are confused NoGOPZone Nov 2012 #75

Trashing. I don't need to read yet another post on this subject. nt. OldDem2012 Nov 2012 #80

all the men and OP that dont get rape. here, read. "Meet the Predators" seabeyond Nov 2012 #89

That's a creepy post. You've just described MineralMan Nov 2012 #91

This is basically necrophilia porn. Starry Messenger Nov 2012 #92

i am so glad that people are feeling the same thing from the post that i was. seabeyond Nov 2012 #97

It's over their heads. RegieRocker Nov 2012 #98

ahhh, just us silly women being all emotional. uh hu. thanks guy for telling us silly women seabeyond Nov 2012 #100

No, she DOESN'T have to say jack SHIT. redqueen Nov 2012 #104

Give RegieRocker a break. He doesn't even understand climate change. morningfog Nov 2012 #109

Oh... redqueen Nov 2012 #112

lol obamanut2012 Nov 2012 #122

I understand fully well RegieRocker Dec 2012 #178

That doesn't sound agnostic at all. morningfog Dec 2012 #189

Not proven either way is an RegieRocker Dec 2012 #192

Regie booby, I live in alaska. You are wrong. Truly, get over yourself. roguevalley Dec 2012 #204

LOL you really don't remember RegieRocker Dec 2012 #217

what a sad pile of piffle honey. truly. you are part of the mind roguevalley Dec 2012 #221

When in doubt, *ask*! Seriously! It doesn't harm anyone! nomorenomore08 Dec 2012 #163

Yea right RegieRocker Dec 2012 #193

Doesn't have to be in so many words. "Is this okay?" probably suffices. nomorenomore08 Dec 2012 #195

Oh no I am not the one RegieRocker Dec 2012 #198

At least your heart's seemingly in the right place. nomorenomore08 Dec 2012 #199

It goes something like this... Shibby2002 Jan 2013 #236

That is total B.S. RegieRocker Dec 2012 #177

If one person says "stop" and the other person doesn't stop MadrasT Dec 2012 #194

The law RegieRocker Dec 2012 #197

I am assuming you're a man. Thank you for the man wisdom. Silly me. I've been a girl roguevalley Dec 2012 #205

Post removed Post removed Dec 2012 #215

bullshit. it is. if women arent allowed to change their mind even if you roguevalley Dec 2012 #222

Exactly. The OP had a list of MineralMan Dec 2012 #181

Wait, what now? FightForMichigan Nov 2012 #105

the whole OP is a treatise to how to read "no" as anything other than "no." redqueen Nov 2012 #106

the women that say no do not mean it enough? that would be legitimate rape from false rape. seabeyond Nov 2012 #107

Are you agnostic on date rape too? morningfog Nov 2012 #110

For those interested, here is another RegieRocker vomit statement: demmiblue Nov 2012 #113

Listen to me: FightForMichigan Nov 2012 #114

demmi is not saying this. the poster copy and pasted something regie said. nt seabeyond Nov 2012 #115

You're right FightForMichigan Nov 2012 #117

the wonderful thing seabeyond Nov 2012 #119

FlightForMichigan, I hug you. Seriously. :*( roguevalley Dec 2012 #207

Do these fuckers get it that rapists LIE????? boston bean Nov 2012 #116

omg obamanut2012 Nov 2012 #123

repeatedly!?! What about telling boys if they molest someone's daughter their dad roguevalley Dec 2012 #206

Rapists tell the judge the woman consented. Even though the victim was screaming no. boston bean Nov 2012 #118

No, the woman doesn't have to say no obamanut2012 Nov 2012 #121

Perfectly stated! MineralMan Dec 2012 #182

Get lost. morningfog Nov 2012 #108

WOW, Well I guess you painted yourself out of a corner HUH? WCLinolVir Dec 2012 #126

I am so fucking sick of this shit. Good fucking grief. I am so enraged by these people. I will amywalk Dec 2012 #136

or amy.... seabeyond Dec 2012 #139

Amy, you are loved. Know that from me. :*( roguevalley Dec 2012 #208

so many self deluded entitled wannabes have lost their way all day lunasun Dec 2012 #141

These threads are ridiculous and your OP is pedantic, obtuse and insulting all at the same time. stevenleser Dec 2012 #143

Steve, why do you think quite a few men here claim they can't tell they have consent? bettyellen Dec 2012 #180

I really dont know what its about. On the one hand, at least half seem to be low post newbies who I stevenleser Dec 2012 #184

Ah, I never notice who is new. I think many who had respectful behavior modeled for them don't need bettyellen Dec 2012 #187

I remember a fucking JUDGE in Ohio or some place back in the midwest told a FIVE roguevalley Dec 2012 #209

+1,000,000,000 x 1,000,000,000 - Well put and definitely coalition_unwilling Dec 2012 #218

Yes means yes, no means no, and if you keep pushing it you are a rapist. Odin2005 Dec 2012 #145

it's making you what, exactly? iwillalwayswonderwhy Dec 2012 #151

really that disgusts me the most and makes clear it is an hostile OP to women. regardless if he seabeyond Dec 2012 #157

Post removed Post removed Dec 2012 #152

You need to delete this thread steve2470 Dec 2012 #159

decency. hey all, honest, decency and ALL this is so easy. dont even have to think. little decency seabeyond Dec 2012 #162

You realize your little story about you and your wife is trivializing genuine marital/acquaintance nomorenomore08 Dec 2012 #166

Re: prostitutes freedom fighter jh Dec 2012 #176

apparently, the OP finds categories of women to be good, bad, indifferent. roguevalley Dec 2012 #210

Reading your OP makes me sad that I am a man. Ugh, the "notches on the belt" coalition_unwilling Dec 2012 #183

Reading your reply makes me a little less sad to be a man. Democracyinkind Dec 2012 #214

have made me very proud of allot of other men on DU seabeyond Dec 2012 #220

Holy Shit Aerows Dec 2012 #196

I'm right with you. Was totally creeped out and mortified for my gender. As coalition_unwilling Dec 2012 #216

This shit makes my skin crawl. Odin2005 Dec 2012 #225

I don't even know what to say about it Aerows Dec 2012 #226

TL;DNR Ian David Dec 2012 #227

Interesting... does such navel gazing change the impact of the assualt salin Dec 2012 #228

Whiskeytide is probably a rapist and should be banned. geek tragedy Dec 2012 #231

Nice attempt to justify rape. idwiyo Jan 2013 #233