Last edited Thu Aug 15, 2024, 02:12 PM - Edit history (1)
First of all, I want to express my heartfelt condolences for your losses, Coventina, including the loss of your son and your multiple pregnancy losses. I feel your pain and I ache for you.
JD Vance would probably think I'm useless, too. I do have one child, but I'll never have grandchildren, so I guess I'm just a waste of space at this point, according to him. 
We "planned" to have at least two kids, but infertility had other ideas. It took us years and endless trips to multiple doctors to conceive our daughter, and once we had her, I just couldn't face going through all that stress all over again. So we said "all done" at one.
She's in her late 30s now and determinedly childfree. She has never wanted kids, never had any interest in them, wouldn't even play with baby dolls when she was little. Kids are simply not her thing.
When it gradually became clear that she was never going to be interested in motherhood, I accepted it. I wanted her to do what was best for her, not put her wishes aside to please me. I've always had a great dislike of parents (usually moms) who hassle their grown kids about giving them grandkids and an even greater dislike of people who push the idea that everybody has to have kids, and I was not about to be one of those people.
Instead, I chose to focus on developing a variety of thobbies and interests that give me satisfaction and joy. I feel that I have a very full life, and although I would have welcomed a grandchild or two, I do not need them to make my life worth living or to make me feel that I have worth as a human.
Furthermore, I know for a fact that all of our lives have worth and value. That goes for your life, Coventina, my childfree daughter's life, and my life as a non-grandmother. We all have our own special gifts and our own contributions to make, all of which are part of the rich tapestry of life.
People like JD Vance, who think having babies is the only thing that gives a young woman's life value and grandchildren are the only thing that can give worth to the life of an older woman, are full of crap and need to stfu about things of which they obviously know nothing. At this point, I'm already sicker of JD than I am of the Orange Hellbeast, sick of his condescension and his know it all attitude and his freaking 19th century views about women!
ALL women have value, whether we are mothers, grandmothers, both, or neither. Each of us has something special to contribute and we need to celebrate that and celebrate each other!
P.S. Fuck Shady Vance and the couch he rode in on!
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