I got my first "Merry Christmas" said to me yesterday

[BanTheGOP]

259. Just say, "A joyous Kwanzaa to you too."

First, let's be clear. In public, a store shows very bad taste by potentially hurting the feelings of their customers by issuing a greeting of a holiday that may provoke anxiety, fear, and hatred. In addition, it steps on the throats of progressive atheists such as myself, that I was once tempted to just yell at them on the spot, store etiquette be damned.

That's when I realized that when businesses use "Merry Christmas," they are promoting THEIR own bias and GOP-based repressionist, capitalist attitudes that demeans the very tenets their holiday ostensibly portrays. And I'm sure most of us understand that very feeling, and for the most part, we reply very tepidly at best.

But I came upon a BRILLIANT idea, ESPECIALLY in white-bread GOP-controlled stores: Respond with "Happy Kwanzaa to you too!" This throws them for a loop, either by shoving their conservative hatred and (most likely) racist bias with the most progressively relevant holiday of the winter period. In fact, when someone says "Merry Christmas" to me, I not only respond with "Happy Kwanzaa," but I also take a couple of minutes about telling them the very tenets of what makes Kwanza the fulfilling, glorious holiday that it actually is. Most rethugs don't want to hear about the Seven Guiding principles of Kwanzaa: Unity, Self-Determination (within a progressive society), Collective Work and Responsibility, Cooperative Economics, Social Purpose, Creativity, and Faith in our fight against the oppressors (in this case, the GOP). I have a 1-minute spiel that comes out eloquently and firmly.

Now, by this time, the greeter will either have learned a new, and better, way to celebrate the season, or (more likely) the greeter will now understand that he or she has met his/her match, and get the very progressive racial unity rubbed in her face.

If you want to know more about Kwanzaa, start at Wikipedia. It's actually a fascinating holiday, and I may even start celebrating it within the context of my own race (I'm white).