We as a community (not just DU, but all Americans, heck, all humans who feel even slightly connected to us) have had a sudden, horrific psychological wound inflicted on us.
We are experiencing grief, rage, denial...
We are experiencing such horror that many of us flinch from even trying to make sense out of it, writing it off as unfathomable, anomalous-- we can't make sense of it, it only hurts to try, and attempts to analyze what happened and why only perpetuate the pain. Others of us want to make sense of it by drawing a neat "blame" box around it-- it could only happen because of "X" and if we fix "X" it can't happen again. Reality is likely somewhere in between, but it's ALL painful.
Some of us respond to this pain by reaching out, wanting to connect, to give and receive the small comfort of our common humanity and grief. Some of us respond with rage, lashing out at the things and people we perceive as blame-worthy. Some of us respond with both-- alternately or at the same time. It's an emotional overload.
We are jolted out of our assumptions about how things are supposed to work. Kids at school in a peaceful Connecticut community are supposed to be safe. And if they're not, then the world is upside-down by that much, feeding disorientation, insecurity, paranoia.
No matter how hard we try to lift ourselves out of "thinking with our feelings" right now, we just can't. Even when we think we are being rational, analytical, objective, we are still experiencing the physical effects of the shock and grief and horror, and those endocrines impact how we respond. And will continue to do so for a long time, whenever we are confronted with the horror of this event.
It's pretty common, in these uncommon times, to experience any or all of the following:
Crying jags
Bursts of anger/rage
Feeling insecure, wanting human connection
Feeling paranoid, wanting isolation
"Unexplained" fatigue (strong feelings take a physical toll)
Sleep disruptions
Persistent thoughts about the horror at seemingly random moments
Yeah. These are trauma symptoms. This is a national trauma. We have to get through it together. We can make it easier on each other by understanding, cutting each other slack, writing off those inappropriate bursts of rage or annoying clinginess as part of the process. By being kind.
Being kind is maybe the best way to process this, collectively and individually. We all need our faith in kindness reaffirmed in the wake of this horror. Be kind.
We are all human, we are all in this together.
sorrowfully,
Bright
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