Do you feel extreme anxiety when you walk in your neighorhood or go for a drive in your car?

[madamesilverspurs]

40. Sister geezer white gal, here.

Never been targeted for my color. That said, I have been doubted/snickered at/accused of lying by officers responding to an assault; my bruises and missing teeth and blood-splattered clothing did nothing to assuage their suspicion that I had somehow caused my assailant's actions. Beyond that experience, I have worked in settings (mainly restaurants and nightclubs) where I was essentially reprimanded for failing to anticipate being routinely manhandled; one of my co-workers was issued a warning for slapping a customer who grabbed her every time she walked by his table. There was an attitude that our 'complaints' were just a waste of the officers' time. And because of that one very violent assault I am still very careful about where I am in a roomful of people, I keep an eye on the doors to see who's coming in. If I'm leaving a store after dark, I will sometimes ask for someone to walk me to my car. I consciously give myself permission to do what I must to feel safe.

I've had this conversation with a retired police officer who acknowledged that he had seen that attitude way too often. It's sad, because in other situations the officers have been very courteous and helpful. And none of the men in my family and circle of friends has ever had to have that conversation with themselves.

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