"Pope" DonKey to canonize "Saint Charlie"! [View all]
trump has completed the 3 steps to canonization:
Investigation - The first step involves examining a person’s life for evidence of the individual’s evil. The individual must be opened by someone in DonKey's Cabinet of Clowns and that was done after he called them all and told them that if they did not propose him, they would be fired and deported. The entire Cabinet, in one voice, made the proposal and DonKey declared Charlie Venerable Vulnerable.
Beautification - The next step is Beautification and this involves verifying a miracle that has been attributed to the Vulnerable person’s intercession. Donkey said it was a miracle he had as vicious a mouth as he did and it was almost as vicious as Donkey himself, and that's a miracle.
Canonization - The last step involves a second miracle. Donkey declared that it was a miracle Charlie had so many followers and sycophant repug cowards that praised him no matter what hatred he spewed. DonKey then declared that the month of September would be officially Charlie's Feast Month with celebrations of ketchup, burgers and KFC chicken.
DonKey is considering nominating Charlie to be a "Doctor of the Country" whose doctrinal writings have special authority. The writings and teachings of the various Doctors of the Country are of particular importance to right wing theology, and their works are considered to be both true and timeless.
:satire: (for those that need it).
Description courtesy of Britannica Encyclopedia's explanation of religious canonization with a few "minor" modifications.
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