General Discussion

Cassidy

(223 posts)

57. Things for men to do if they have "uncontrollable" urges

Wed Dec 26, 2012, 03:17 PM

Dec 2012

Here are some suggestions for what a man should do instead of firing an employee whom they lust after:

1. Seek professional help. This will probably need to be long term.

2. Find a better job for your employee and encourage them to go there. Find them such a good job that they will take it. Finding something with a significant salary increase and better benefits would be a minimum. If necessary, make it clear to them that you have psychological problems in order to make sure that they leave.

3. Find employment where you will not interact with members of the public. Do not work in health care, in police work, or in any type of work where you have authority over individuals whom you might find "irresistible." Innocent people do not deserve to be exposed to you. No employee deserves to have such a creep for a boss.

4. Recognize that no response to a suggestive, vulgar, or extremely intimate comment means that the person is politely telling you that you are a jerk and you should not repeat that behavior.

The bottom line is that if your brain is not in control of your behavior, you need to recognize this and take the necessary precautions so that other people are not injured by your psychological problems.

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American Taliban: Women have no right to their own bodies, but they're responsible for HIS [View all] ProfessionalLeftist Dec 2012 OP

+1,000 Mona Dec 2012 #1

My first thought after reading this was, Gloria Allred pocoloco Dec 2012 #38

Hey, Gloria Allred is ALRIGHT! If we hadn't had irritants like her, we'd be so much farther calimary Dec 2012 #69

Seriously. Seriously. knitter4democracy Dec 2012 #2

k&r AmyDeLune Dec 2012 #3

It was actually the Iowa Supreme Court. libinnyandia Dec 2012 #4

Thank you. I've corrected the piece. ProfessionalLeftist Dec 2012 #9

THE EVIL PEOPLE ARE ALL THE SAME ROBROX Dec 2012 #5

The Enemy Godot51 Dec 2012 #6

Sounds more like the dentist's wife at fault ErikJ Dec 2012 #7

Seems he had issues with her presence regardless the wife. And the pastor (male) helped ProfessionalLeftist Dec 2012 #11

there is no doubt this is Taliban behavior liberal_at_heart Dec 2012 #13

The question before the court was... jberryhill Dec 2012 #27

It was gender discrimination. JDPriestly Dec 2012 #41

Excellent post and great advice. mbperrin Dec 2012 #68

so, dont blame the attractive woman, blame the other woman. whatever we do, do NOT blame the man. seabeyond Dec 2012 #15

Please read my post #41. JDPriestly Dec 2012 #43

His wife OBVIOUSLY has a problem too. kurtzapril4 Dec 2012 #78

disgusting but not surprising given our culture's disrespect of women liberal_at_heart Dec 2012 #8

He fired her on advice ohheckyeah Dec 2012 #10

Yes. Isn't that .... ProfessionalLeftist Dec 2012 #12

Of course, the pastor ohheckyeah Dec 2012 #18

"..keeping things professional." is an UNDERSTATEMENT. Volaris Dec 2012 #47

Holy Moly... ReRe Dec 2012 #14

Just when you think it could not get stupider. mbperrin Dec 2012 #16

Some consolation prize. iemitsu Dec 2012 #28

Three decades in education, work with what you've got. mbperrin Dec 2012 #33

!@#$%^&*!!!!! freshwest Dec 2012 #17

Once again, Women are relegated to second-class citizens. This shit is going to keep up .. BlueJazz Dec 2012 #19

The Taliban outlaw woman to work, have any legal voice, show any skin, use phones, drive... Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #20

Highly recommended read. BlancheSplanchnik Dec 2012 #21

Evil and Stupid... Grey Dec 2012 #22

Iowa, actually, not Idaho. nt cecilfirefox Dec 2012 #23

Tx. Changed the post and the piece ProfessionalLeftist Dec 2012 #34

Fuck, what the hell century are we in... WCGreen Dec 2012 #24

What about his patients? catchnrelease Dec 2012 #25

What do you think he should have done? What was a better solution? Nt Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #26

Are you actually defending this? To answer your question: he should have done nothing. ieoeja Dec 2012 #32

No. I'm wondering if you were so attracted to someone at work Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #39

We also get erections when our jeans rub us the right(or wrong) way... Humanist_Activist Dec 2012 #42

Your jeans rubbing on your penis don't have a source attraction... Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #45

The point is that your penis doesn't need a source of attraction, or if it does have one... Humanist_Activist Dec 2012 #54

Put it in context. This was not just someone he saw walking down the street. Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #60

"doesn't mean we go around humping blue jeans at Old Navy all the time." ieoeja Dec 2012 #51

That does it! Wranglers from now on! mbperrin Dec 2012 #71

Weird question. ieoeja Dec 2012 #50

Yeah, I don't get that turn of phrase either, and usually, unless you are itching to get fired... Humanist_Activist Dec 2012 #55

I'm not suggesting some initial planning was not involved. But when two Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #61

Sex between coworkers is quite common as you well know... Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #59

His choices were (1) do not fuck her or (2) fuck her over. He chose option #2. n/t ieoeja Dec 2012 #65

See post 59 for context. Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #66

See post 65 for reply in context. n/t ieoeja Dec 2012 #67

Ok. Lets juxtapose context. (Just discussing context not comparing situations) Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #75

But nothing says you HAVE to act on it. annabanana Dec 2012 #56

Context. See post 59. Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #62

I was RESPONDING to # 59 annabanana Dec 2012 #76

You were responding to 39... Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #80

Things for men to do if they have "uncontrollable" urges Cassidy Dec 2012 #57

Counseling would be good. Finding another job for someone is problematic... Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #63

I'M the one that's flabbergasted. I've been in the workforce mbperrin Dec 2012 #72

... Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #79

So 6% married someone they dated more than once from work. mbperrin Dec 2012 #85

If 40% have dated someone at work how many would have if asked? Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #88

Whoa. The US labor force is 155,000,000, give or take. mbperrin Dec 2012 #91

Yes you're right. Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #93

So your claim is that 31% of the people who dated only one time married? mbperrin Dec 2012 #94

It's more about reading comprehension and math than statistics. Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #95

I didn't get snotty. I realized that even though you were quoting statistics, you were misusing them mbperrin Dec 2012 #96

I would have liked to discuss this more.... Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #97

I have this very discussion with my sophomore high school students every year. mbperrin Dec 2012 #70

It really depends on the situation. The body responds in certain ways depending on certain stimuli Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #82

I've read the post 59, understand what you say completely. It is wrong. mbperrin Dec 2012 #86

THANK YOU mbperrin!! annabanana Dec 2012 #87

I'm not quite sure exactly what you mean is a learned behavior. You could be referring to a couple Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #90

The key word is "difficult," not "impossible." reflection Dec 2012 #73

It wasn't as simple as that. Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #83

As a gay man . . . markpkessinger Dec 2012 #81

In retrospect that wasn't the best argument as pertaining to this case... Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #84

He needs to exercise control over himself, not someone else. ProfessionalLeftist Dec 2012 #36

Context: see post 59. Nt Flabbergasted Dec 2012 #40

Right. And that, in my opinion, is the crux of this... Volaris Dec 2012 #53

I thought Iowa Shadowflash Dec 2012 #29

This latest ruling is a license to legally sexually harass women. Demo_Chris Dec 2012 #30

It's a license to discriminate against women for being women ProfessionalLeftist Dec 2012 #31

Women have been blamed for men's violent behavior since the dawn of humanity. lunatica Dec 2012 #35

This is the issue with patriarchal religion. It's no better than the Taliban. ProfessionalLeftist Dec 2012 #37

If he started to have a crush on her, that's his problem, not hers, she shouldn't have been... Humanist_Activist Dec 2012 #44

Gore Vidal had it right wanttosavetheplanet Dec 2012 #46

If your marriage is in danger Aerows Dec 2012 #48

This reminds me of a church I use to go to.. SummerSnow Dec 2012 #49

Well, thank God............. Amaril Dec 2012 #52

Our religious fundamentalists really aren't any better than the ones we're fighting. Initech Dec 2012 #58

This was discussed last week, here is the thread happyslug Dec 2012 #64

kick Why Syzygy Dec 2012 #74

Our religious fundamentalists really aren't better than the ones we're fighting overseas. Initech Dec 2012 #77

I'd hoped for better for my daugher, and her daughters... liberalmuse Dec 2012 #89

The misguided believe of Old school religion haunting us again NoAmericanTaliban Dec 2012 #92