Such a question is underpinned - subtly, cleverly - by a refusal to admit that Israel's response was not at all "proper".
To me, that viewpoint is still defending Netanyahu's "war" and if you are defending that, you are still pro-Netanyahu in the only way that matters.
A "proper" response would have started with the acknowledgement that Palestinian civilians were not collectively responsible for October 7th. It was clear from the very beginning that was not the case - to wit, "we are fighting animals", "a second Nakba" "all laws of warfare have been loosened" "there are no innocents" etc. Because of that refusal to do so the the laws of war and humanitarian laws and conventions were thrown out the window and a murderous spree of vengeance and retribution followed. I don't think that was "proper".
A person can support the existence of a sovereign state of Israel as long as that support does not morph into support for the erasure of Palestinians from their lands and homes. I'm afraid that, unless you opposed Netanyahu's war that was clearly fought dishonestly, savagely and illegally to achieve THAT VERY GOAL of Palestinian erasure, then you still don't understand why this war was wrong on many levels. You could start by asking different questions that are not underpinned by a desire to excuse or mitigate. For example, why did all of Israeli society (with the exception of stalwart old leftists and human rights defenders, alas far too few and dwindling every year) accept the idea of collective responsibility and collective punishment - why were they not as revolted by the carnage as the rest of the world, quite the opposite?
And I never ignore Palestinian "grievances". The whole problem as I see it - the root of all this evil happening there - is that they've been ignored for too long.
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