Welcome to DU! The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards. Join the community: Create a free account Support DU (and get rid of ads!): Become a Star Member Latest Breaking News Editorials & Other Articles General Discussion The DU Lounge All Forums Issue Forums Culture Forums Alliance Forums Region Forums Support Forums Help & Search

DET

(2,631 posts)
34. "Women are expected to work like they have no children and parent like they have no job."
Wed Jun 3, 2026, 10:56 PM
17 hrs ago

I would add ‘…and take care of their parents like they had no kids and no job’.

We were lucky…my mother was in a great nursing home on Medicaid and my mother-in-law could afford a good assisted living facility. But many families can’t do that, and the burden of care often falls primarily on the women in the family.

This will get much worse once the Medicaid cuts in the Big Crappy Bill go into effect, since the majority of nursing home patients are on Medicaid and will be kicked out of their nursing homes and returned to their families - if they are lucky enough to have them. From what I’ve seen, most nursing home patients require 24/7 specialized care, which is impossible to provide in a home environment. I find this all unbearably cruel.

Recommendations

11 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

Bookmarked!!! IA8IT 22 hrs ago #1
Most Women sit around watching "A brighter Day" ..polishing their nails... chouchou 22 hrs ago #2
What is "A brighter Day"? TIA Celerity 20 hrs ago #15
A reference to the "soap operas" that women supposedly have nothing niyad 19 hrs ago #16
never heard of it Celerity 19 hrs ago #20
I had never heard of that one, either, so I looked it up. Wayyyyyyyyyy niyad 19 hrs ago #23
One of the ridiculous daytime Dramas that could have wasted one's life away. chouchou 16 hrs ago #37
I've never been a huge fan PatSeg 6 hrs ago #47
Unfortunately, Your words are True. chouchou 5 hrs ago #49
And guess what types of people PatSeg 4 hrs ago #50
My husband and I were invited to a dinner, the first time we saw that.. chouchou 38 min ago #60
Do you remember ... oldsoldierfadingfast 10 min ago #62
Will the Democrats campaign on that issue? MustLoveBeagles 22 hrs ago #3
Symptom of a bigger issue Lithos 21 hrs ago #5
Yes it is. OldBaldy1701E 9 hrs ago #42
A smart candidate would Jilly_in_VA 3 hrs ago #52
Spot on. Raven123 21 hrs ago #4
So Far Timewas 21 hrs ago #6
Until the 70's, women could do little financially on their own. paleotn 19 hrs ago #25
Yep. My mother won't bank with one of the major American banks because of a grudge related to that. RockRaven 18 hrs ago #31
Same thing happened to my spouse in 1986 Farmer-Rick 7 hrs ago #44
I lived those days Lifeafter70 18 hrs ago #33
BTW StoolPigeon 21 hrs ago #7
Oh right... men have nothing but problems getting a lawyer! ihaveaquestion 21 hrs ago #9
Dear Goddess, it is very disappointing to see that sort of thing on a niyad 20 hrs ago #12
Being a single parent H2O Man 19 hrs ago #19
Lawyers won't take your money? Oh really. paleotn 19 hrs ago #26
Sounds serious Torchlight 18 hrs ago #28
Men can't afford lawyers? johnp3907 17 hrs ago #35
And play mommy with benefits to an adult spouse. xuplate 21 hrs ago #8
OMG! After spending all day trying to find the wallet slightlv 19 hrs ago #17
huggggggggs, my friend. Your DU family is here, so lean as hard as niyad 19 hrs ago #21
I feel it for you malaise 19 hrs ago #22
So sorry. paleotn 18 hrs ago #27
We are here for you, V SheltieLover 18 hrs ago #30
If you have a healthcare provider you regularly talk to Sympthsical 18 hrs ago #32
Thanks... slightlv 15 hrs ago #38
So pleased to hear this Sympthsical 15 hrs ago #40
Same here in reverse - playing parent to a 5 year old wife who is 82. Aussie105 14 hrs ago #41
I hear you. Friends we've had for 20 years slightlv 1 hr ago #59
A humble suggestion ... if he keeps losing his wallet FakeNoose 7 hrs ago #45
Slightly... CousinIT 7 hrs ago #46
Is the VA program mesnt for the vet who's the slightlv 1 hr ago #58
The VA Caregiver Support Program is for caregivers of veterans CousinIT 24 min ago #61
I feel for you; I went thru the dementia caretaker twice. The first time was with my mother. state of stupid 2 hrs ago #55
my brother coached the men's company softball team Skittles 20 hrs ago #10
Was watching a comedy routine Nittersing 5 hrs ago #48
And then get no credit for either and blamed for everything Tumbulu 20 hrs ago #11
And that is putting it VERY politely. niyad 20 hrs ago #13
Unless you believe the "rumors" that Harris actually won. Which I do. slightlv 19 hrs ago #18
I mean...everyone is. It's just that women, for the most part, picked up the slack for some time, and now are not. WhiskeyGrinder 20 hrs ago #14
As a single father who raised three daughters BeneteauBum 19 hrs ago #24
Thank you so much for including the video link. I will look at it later, niyad 18 hrs ago #29
"Women are expected to work like they have no children and parent like they have no job." DET 17 hrs ago #34
GREAT and VERY TRUE line! Jack Valentino 17 hrs ago #36
"The mental load" women try to explain to men that they are carrying the mental load BlueWaveNeverEnd 15 hrs ago #39
Yep. Diamond_Dog 4 hrs ago #51
Women marry a man with kids and are shocked when he shifts all child care to him BlueWaveNeverEnd 2 hrs ago #57
And society suffers from the epidemic of unparented kids. live love laugh 8 hrs ago #43
My wife and I just passed 30 years of marriage in March of this year... Moostache 3 hrs ago #53
Elizabeth Warren points out the "two-income trap"... gulliver 3 hrs ago #54
I think the biggest problem is the exploitative nature of work now. LT Barclay 2 hrs ago #56
Latest Discussions»General Discussion»"Women are expected to wo...»Reply #34