General Discussion

TheMadMonk

(6,187 posts)

158. She is not being called names because she was assaulted.

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 11:50 PM

Jan 2013

She is being called names over a frivolous (by all appearances) lawsuit.

AND YOU ARE DOING RAPE VICTIMS NO SERVICE by playing silly games with conflating semantics in the hope of tarring people with the "appologist" brush. Would "horendously" be a sufficiently emotive adjective to get you off that hobby horse?

Then again I too have issues with "turned out badly" becasue it presuposes that some sort of connection was there to be seen if someone had just looked hard enough.

ANYONE, ANYONE AT ALL, remotely connected her life could have attacked her. Co-worker, friend of a friend, friend of a sibling, register jockey at any store where they have a policy of asking name and address, where larger purchases are involved.

And conversely, anyone, anyone at all, remotely connected with his life might have been victimised in her place.

Nothing "turned out" badly. A terribly bad person did a terribly bad thing, and she just happened to be the one it was done to.

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Woman sues Match.com for $10 million [View all] Still Sensible Jan 2013 OP

I would sue her homebuilder, too Dreamer Tatum Jan 2013 #1

and the knife company Angry Dragon Jan 2013 #3

And whomever made her computer. nt Dreamer Tatum Jan 2013 #4

And her internet provider. Drunken Irishman Jan 2013 #26

+1 Liberal_in_LA Jan 2013 #167

All dating has the same potential danger. MineralMan Jan 2013 #2

Maybe. Curmudgeoness Jan 2013 #9

Match does no screening Confusious Jan 2013 #15

Yes, they do. And this man was wanted in Phoenix PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #34

No, he was not. cthulu2016 Jan 2013 #83

ok, I stand corrected on that point. She should have her day in court and not be fucking ridiculed PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #84

There is no reason to ridicule her cthulu2016 Jan 2013 #101

How can anyone possibly know it's frivolous? PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #103

Very American. Sue someone else because plaintive... TheMadMonk Jan 2013 #139

*plantiff PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #140

Multi-billion. And strange isn't it that we "little guys"... TheMadMonk Jan 2013 #147

not when they are in the wrong qazplm Jan 2013 #151

I'm a "little guy" business and I think frivolous lawsuits are frivolous regardless of how big kestrel91316 Jan 2013 #232

I'm with you! nt Tumbulu Jan 2013 #253

There is a huge difference between ... 1StrongBlackMan Jan 2013 #258

good point nt Tumbulu Jan 2013 #259

If I pay for drinks at a bar Confusious Jan 2013 #269

Not the same ... 1StrongBlackMan Jan 2013 #288

It's the same Confusious Jan 2013 #292

What part of Bar = Drinks ... 1StrongBlackMan Jan 2013 #306

They were in my 20's, they were in my 30's Confusious Jan 2013 #307

Okay ... 1StrongBlackMan Jan 2013 #308

Well, yea, that is the case Confusious Jan 2013 #309

Okay n/t 1StrongBlackMan Jan 2013 #310

I think they mean they screen for similar interests JVS Jan 2013 #268

They started screening for sex offenders in march Confusious Jan 2013 #270

This story is from May of 2012.... Curmudgeoness Jan 2013 #298

I disagree. If you meet the person through friends or family who have known him a long time, pnwmom Jan 2013 #225

Big difference between knowing someone as a friend Confusious Jan 2013 #271

Welcome to online dating. Curmudgeoness Jan 2013 #5

Thanks for your broad brush statement Confusious Jan 2013 #14

Met my hubby on a dating site. Daughter also met her husband on another site. Most things patricia92243 Jan 2013 #121

I always find the mildly crazy Confusious Jan 2013 #126

That's a silly generalization. Where do "winners" meet dates? Bars? DirkGently Jan 2013 #25

Yes, it's much better to meet in a dark place TexasBushwhacker Jan 2013 #74

My thoughts exactly. If anything, the ability to talk anonymously, DirkGently Jan 2013 #96

Exactly. Before I meet anyone in person I make sure there's a long electronic trail kestrel91316 Jan 2013 #235

Sweeping generalizations like that are a sweeping fail sakabatou Jan 2013 #75

Absolutely - I have had three marriage proposals from guys at DU Samantha Jan 2013 #170

Really? Proposals? sakabatou Jan 2013 #174

Yes, but unfortunately I have no "affair to remember" nt Samantha Jan 2013 #262

"DU?" KansDem Jan 2013 #227

I found out some time later one of these guys already had a significant other Samantha Jan 2013 #263

Will you marry me? Major Nikon Jan 2013 #244

LOL Cha Jan 2013 #247

Thanks for asking but I don't fool around any more with DU'ers Samantha Jan 2013 #264

Good call Major Nikon Jan 2013 #265

Lucky the guy was stupid enough to state it. LiberalFighter Jan 2013 #157

I'm sorry, but I really had to clean the coffee off the monitor after that one... TreasonousBastard Jan 2013 #162

I know, huh? Le Taz Hot Jan 2013 #169

Really, "Losers"? alarimer Jan 2013 #212

I know several women who have been happily married for several years to the very normal, kestrel91316 Jan 2013 #233

That's quite a huge broad brush there, eh? liberalhistorian Jan 2013 #242

Did he post a naked pic of her? banned from Kos Jan 2013 #6

He stabbed her 10 times and stomped on her head gollygee Jan 2013 #17

+100 alcibiades_mystery Jan 2013 #18

I'm sure other trolls find that hysterical. UnrepentantLiberal Jan 2013 #27

No wonder you are "banned from KOS" idwiyo Jan 2013 #49

Seconded n/t Strelnikov_ Jan 2013 #150

This message was self-deleted by its author darkangel218 Jan 2013 #97

Does Match.com do background checks? bluestateguy Jan 2013 #7

No, they don't do background checks. Confusious Jan 2013 #13

Exactly so. DirkGently Jan 2013 #24

I beg to differ PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #33

And they're bloody fools for doing it. TheMadMonk Jan 2013 #148

The website I use has a very prominent disclaimer, IIRC, about safety in meeting people. kestrel91316 Jan 2013 #236

The stooopid it... alphafemale Jan 2013 #8

She should be suing Al Gore. Scuba Jan 2013 #10

No comment on this case, but I wonder about Christian Mingle. longship Jan 2013 #11

LOL n/t Still Sensible Jan 2013 #12

hahah My friend worried about Dog's match for her, she'd EvilAL Jan 2013 #19

What might be God's match might not be a good match for a couple. LiberalFighter Jan 2013 #159

Aside from the obvious "stupidity" of the lawsuit etherealtruth Jan 2013 #16

Yea Confusious Jan 2013 #28

That is purely awful etherealtruth Jan 2013 #135

I'm getting over it Confusious Jan 2013 #144

She should sue her educators and parents for not disclosing the dangers of stupidity. nt OneTenthofOnePercent Jan 2013 #20

What did she do that was stupid? UnrepentantLiberal Jan 2013 #30

Lawsuit. Confusious Jan 2013 #42

Someone will sue her for having a garage. n/t 2on2u Jan 2013 #21

the woman is a first class asswipe mgcgulfcoast Jan 2013 #22

wow. you're a heartless pig. "turned out badly", huh? PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #29

I think this woman is part of the problem Travis_0004 Jan 2013 #168

What problem is this woman part of? The one that got her stabbed repeatedly and her skull crushed? PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #178

So in your opinion Match.com is guilty Travis_0004 Jan 2013 #191

I think you and I don't have the details of the case and neither of us is qualified to PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #193

Yes, and some lawyer did take it on Tumbulu Jan 2013 #255

I agree with you nt Tumbulu Jan 2013 #254

Organizations are assumed to have the resources Warpy Jan 2013 #40

This guy had no known criminal record Confusious Jan 2013 #58

Then she'll likely lose the suit because there was no way to know Warpy Jan 2013 #66

seething hatred of women Confusious Jan 2013 #71

Relationship? The article makes it clear that they had known each other 8 days HangOnKids Jan 2013 #88

So just saying there might be other factors Confusious Jan 2013 #92

You Are Going Over The Top HangOnKids Jan 2013 #102

You went over the top Confusious Jan 2013 #108

what I find odd is the phrasing hfojvt Jan 2013 #132

Wow,after 8 day's of knowing him she broke up with him?? SummerSnow Jan 2013 #287

I've gotten a little "wacked out" at the end of a relationship or two.... mike_c Jan 2013 #301

She's not going to "lose" the suit because it won't go to trial. duffyduff Jan 2013 #118

Well, we hope they'll be that generous Warpy Jan 2013 #120

Which would have had ZERO, NONE, NADA effect in this case. TheMadMonk Jan 2013 #153

They shouldn't even have to pay THAT. And when we all have medical insurance, kestrel91316 Jan 2013 #237

Actually, I thought the article said thucythucy Jan 2013 #81

If you read the links, rather than taking them as proof unread, you would cthulu2016 Jan 2013 #86

My mistake. thucythucy Jan 2013 #94

The animosity is for her greed and stupidity. TheMadMonk Jan 2013 #154

That's a bit strong... TreasonousBastard Jan 2013 #164

Interesting take on what drives some litigation. thucythucy Jan 2013 #218

And she "chose" to get born in a first world country... TheMadMonk Jan 2013 #243

We often see what validates our own preconceptions. LanternWaste Jan 2013 #300

Actually, I'd at least afford her the qualification of desperate. TheMadMonk Jan 2013 #304

No, read it again Confusious Jan 2013 #89

Ask that one "Where are you getting the info that she told him where she lived?" PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #91

At a bare minimum she provided him with information... TheMadMonk Jan 2013 #156

Well, I don't know about that. I went looking for some old school chums a year or so ago. MADem Jan 2013 #173

This is true, but the simpler solution remains she gave... TheMadMonk Jan 2013 #245

Maybe she did, maybe she didn't. We just don't know. MADem Jan 2013 #261

I can't believe this was allowed to remain. polly7 Jan 2013 #57

The woman is stabbed 7 times and you think it "turned out badly?" ScreamingMeemie Jan 2013 #111

She is not being called names because she was assaulted. TheMadMonk Jan 2013 #158

Not in the real world. She would have been much better off dating only people pnwmom Jan 2013 #228

Or one of several bars in a nightclub district. TheMadMonk Jan 2013 #246

Match.com takes money to arrange dates. The Post Office doesn't. pnwmom Jan 2013 #267

Match.com doesn't arrange dates Confusious Jan 2013 #275

Well Confucious has spoken. They're a specialist... TheMadMonk Jan 2013 #281

Match.com isn't a friend. It's a money making enterprise. As far as your claim about the woman, pnwmom Jan 2013 #226

I really would have thought the replies to this would have been something like gollygee Jan 2013 #23

Another thread that seems to be attracting trolls. UnrepentantLiberal Jan 2013 #32

It's quite alright now - to act like mean RWers. Whisp Jan 2013 #36

I agree that this is a horrible thing to have happened to her mythology Jan 2013 #51

Why can't you let a judge or jury decide that? PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #55

Because all too often in cases like this it never... TheMadMonk Jan 2013 #161

She's being mocked because she filed a stupid lawsuit. SpartanDem Jan 2013 #106

That's cool how you know all of the details of this case. Nobody should ever go to court, just ask PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #114

What details could possibly make Match.com responsible? SpartanDem Jan 2013 #123

I am not the plaintiff's attorney and I don't try to settle cases online, Frist. PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #124

You said there were "details" that could make the suit this legit SpartanDem Jan 2013 #129

I said she should have her day in court. You claim to know she doesn't deserve it. PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #131

�The basis of the lawsuit is the advertising that is utilized by Match.com lulling women .. SpartanDem Jan 2013 #133

Ok, Judge Judy. PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #134

Way to refute my arguments SpartanDem Jan 2013 #137

Your complete argument is "sounds like bullshit to me". The end. PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #138

Or she deserves an opportunity to try to have her day in court... octothorpe Jan 2013 #163

I agree womanofthehills Jan 2013 #198

Even if you disagree with the lawsuit gollygee Jan 2013 #119

What happen to her was awful SpartanDem Jan 2013 #127

Read through the thread gollygee Jan 2013 #128

She is not being mocked for having been brutally attacked. TheMadMonk Jan 2013 #160

See post 128 gollygee Jan 2013 #197

+ 1 n/t Still Sensible Jan 2013 #199

Yes, there are some really awful posts Tumbulu Jan 2013 #256

Sad story. Frivolous lawsuit. cthulu2016 Jan 2013 #31

If you set up an acquaintance on a blind date and the blind date onenote Jan 2013 #35

It depends gollygee Jan 2013 #37

It's a billion dollar a year industry not a well-intentioned friend, ffs. PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #38

Depends. If you charge money for the service of setting her up, thucythucy Jan 2013 #41

Obviously if match.com falsely claimed to do a background check onenote Jan 2013 #46

They don't have to ask you whether you have a criminal record to find out gollygee Jan 2013 #53

Best way in the world if you round out the contract... TheMadMonk Jan 2013 #166

No it asks nothing of the sort Confusious Jan 2013 #61

PeaceNikki has posted twice that they DO do background checks thucythucy Jan 2013 #90

Ask him "Where are you getting the info that she told him where she lived?" PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #93

And who cares if she did? thucythucy Jan 2013 #98

Agreed. It's disgusting. PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #99

+1000 smirkymonkey Jan 2013 #130

Just to be clear, my post immediately above thucythucy Jan 2013 #100

I have peacenikki on ignore Confusious Jan 2013 #105

Youre talking about employment, not a private thucythucy Jan 2013 #117

More strawmen Confusious Jan 2013 #125

Granted .. Maybe is isn't Match's fault Trajan Jan 2013 #39

Agreed. thucythucy Jan 2013 #43

So she should get the $10 million? Confusious Jan 2013 #44

FUCK the ten million dollars ... Trajan Jan 2013 #47

She told someone where she lived within 8 days Confusious Jan 2013 #52

So it's her fault she was stabbed 10 times and had her head stomped on? gollygee Jan 2013 #56

It is the perps fault. It is no more match.com's fault than her internet provider. alphafemale Jan 2013 #192

That's cool how you know all of the details of this case. Nobody should ever go to court, just ask PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #59

She should have her day in court and not be fucking ridiculed by people who don't know shit about PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #48

+1 leftstreet Jan 2013 #80

+1 Starry Messenger Jan 2013 #171

Not Your Money HangOnKids Jan 2013 #50

I'm not the upset one Confusious Jan 2013 #54

I'm Not Giving Any Body Money But Thanks For Caring HangOnKids Jan 2013 #60

She made some stupid decisions Confusious Jan 2013 #63

Where are you getting the info that she told him where she lived? PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #64

Well So It Goes HangOnKids Jan 2013 #65

They shouldn't Confusious Jan 2013 #67

They Have a Big Fat Reputation To Protect HangOnKids Jan 2013 #70

I doubt it will be huge. Confusious Jan 2013 #72

She won't get 10 million-- that's just lawyer talk to file the suit... TreasonousBastard Jan 2013 #165

Why wouldn't I do it? Confusious Jan 2013 #201

Agreed. A (thankfully very) few people enjoy victim blaming women for sport. PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #45

Agreed, people need to learn about empathy Bjorn Against Jan 2013 #143

Thank you. redqueen Jan 2013 #289

One could always READ THE STORY cthulu2016 Jan 2013 #62

He was wanted. PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #68

Tracking down warrants? That's absurd. DirkGently Jan 2013 #76

He wasn't. Read the story you link to, and also the OP link. cthulu2016 Jan 2013 #77

Ah, thanks for the time frame gollygee Jan 2013 #87

An excellent point. The suit is apparently based on DirkGently Jan 2013 #69

I don't understand how people actually do this. Sen. Walter Sobchak Jan 2013 #73

Smart people have rules Confusious Jan 2013 #78

Where are you getting the info that she told him where she lived? PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #82

I'm also wondering when 8 dates became "a mere 8 dates" gollygee Jan 2013 #95

"days" not "dates" cthulu2016 Jan 2013 #104

I still see no claim anywhere other than here that she TOLD him where she lived. PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #107

Even so gollygee Jan 2013 #116

It's also incredibly easy to find out where people live. DirkGently Jan 2013 #141

I never hit the bars and I did okay, Sen. Walter Sobchak Jan 2013 #110

Well, some of are a little more shy then others Confusious Jan 2013 #113

I've known people who have met great people on internet dating sites gollygee Jan 2013 #79

There are bad people everywhere. Bars are worse. DirkGently Jan 2013 #85

I've had mixed success with it Blue_Tires Jan 2013 #299

When I posted this, I didn't expect the replies Still Sensible Jan 2013 #109

mmm, field day on women. for some, whatever goes is acceptable. nt seabeyond Jan 2013 #112

Indeed! This Thread has been very illuminating n/t HangOnKids Jan 2013 #122

It is, but she will get a settlement large enough to pay her medical expenses duffyduff Jan 2013 #115

I expect that is what will happen Still Sensible Jan 2013 #200

Here's the thing folks - some men hurt women TexasBushwhacker Jan 2013 #136

That won't work either Confusious Jan 2013 #146

This message was self-deleted by its author HangOnKids Jan 2013 #149

I don't see the liability unless he had a criminal record. nt Honeycombe8 Jan 2013 #142

The news article says he had no criminal history before he attacked her. tammywammy Jan 2013 #155

There are some cold, callous, frightening people posting on this site. myrna minx Jan 2013 #145

No, just people sick of frivolous of lawsuits! n-t Logical Jan 2013 #172

I'm quite capable of reading the posts on their own merit, thanks. This thread, myrna minx Jan 2013 #180

Or frivolous posts Coyotl Jan 2013 #196

I have sympathy for someone who scalds themselves badly with hot coffee... Silent3 Jan 2013 #181

You should spend some time learning about what you speak. You have fallen for GOP bullshit. PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #182

Thank you for posting this! myrna minx Jan 2013 #184

Me, too. People are "Fristing" all over it. Who the FUCK do they think they are? PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #186

The libertarians have defiantly made it popular to shame and ridicule anyone who seeks myrna minx Jan 2013 #188

Exactly. That's why it's almost poetic that someone mentioned that case. PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #189

Even if that particular old anecdote doesn't hold up well... Silent3 Jan 2013 #185

Watch the film and here's a thought: let her have her day in court. PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #187

There's not one touch of blaming her for the attack in what I said. n/t Silent3 Jan 2013 #194

no, but others are. PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #195

This message was self-deleted by its author devilgrrl Jan 2013 #203

Frivolous lawsuits happen in all directions Silent3 Jan 2013 #234

This message was self-deleted by its author devilgrrl Jan 2013 #250

I knew some of this info on the McDonald's coffee case thucythucy Jan 2013 #224

Not trying to steal PeaceNikki's thunder justiceischeap Jan 2013 #282

Thanks for the info. thucythucy Jan 2013 #291

Read these posts - people are calling her an "asswipe" among other things. myrna minx Jan 2013 #183

Being a victim does not turn one into a saint. jeff47 Jan 2013 #207

To some Confusious Jan 2013 #279

I add my voice to those pointing out that the coffee thing is RW propaganda cthulu2016 Jan 2013 #231

Yep. Can't just say, 'That's a frivolous lawsuit.' redqueen Jan 2013 #290

I don't think they are at fault treestar Jan 2013 #152

stab me too Trascoli Jan 2013 #175

EIGHT DAYS and he knows where she lives? Th1onein Jan 2013 #176

*That's* what you take away from that article? myrna minx Jan 2013 #179

Yeah, WOW, that's what I took away from it. Th1onein Jan 2013 #215

You really have no idea how the internet works, do you? Sheldon Cooper Jan 2013 #190

You know, you are probably right, Sheldon Cooper Th1onein Jan 2013 #214

Just returning the sly, snide, and nasty innuendo in your comment. Sheldon Cooper Jan 2013 #217

There was no such innuendo in my comment. Th1onein Jan 2013 #219

lol Sheldon Cooper Jan 2013 #220

There's a term for this: disrupting. Th1onein Jan 2013 #221

I don't think that means what you think it means, but it's amusing nonetheless. Sheldon Cooper Jan 2013 #222

It means what it says, Dearie. Th1onein Jan 2013 #223

Not that hard to believe... octothorpe Jan 2013 #202

How old is this lady? Ian Iam Jan 2013 #177

This message was self-deleted by its author devilgrrl Jan 2013 #204

Match.com should clearly inform people: Our members include rapists, stalkers & murderers limpyhobbler Jan 2013 #205

/facepalm jeff47 Jan 2013 #209

LOL ok. But match.com makes a lot of money selling an image of safe dating. Needs a warning label. limpyhobbler Jan 2013 #210

Only in your head. jeff47 Jan 2013 #211

I just watched 3 match.com ads on youtube and all of them showed safe environments with no warnings. limpyhobbler Jan 2013 #216

Again, your premise is people are too dumb to tie their own shoes. jeff47 Jan 2013 #249

Maybe it seemed safe. People don't necessarily know what's safe on the internet. limpyhobbler Jan 2013 #297

Warnings: Confusious Jan 2013 #277

If you had looked, Confusious Jan 2013 #278

If Republicans had their way, very few people would be able to have their day in court. Nine Jan 2013 #206

Thank you! thucythucy Jan 2013 #229

Yes, PeaceNikki has done a good job on this thread. Nine Jan 2013 #241

The number one creator of frivolous suits Confusious Jan 2013 #276

Idiotic. You can meet psychopaths or dangerous people anywhere... NYC Liberal Jan 2013 #208

I had a dating website accidentally expose my email address (and my real name). alarimer Jan 2013 #213

You should never trust anyone you know Confusious Jan 2013 #274

She should sue her lawyer for taking this nuisance case. leveymg Jan 2013 #230

I think she is doing the right thing. A big $$$ lawsuit is getting her.... Walk away Jan 2013 #238

I once met a crazy person on a bus Confusious Jan 2013 #272

You don't get on a bus for the purpose of meeting a life partner... Walk away Jan 2013 #295

Match isn't selling introductions to dates Confusious Jan 2013 #296

She should have sued them for 100 million tjwash Jan 2013 #239

Exactly. Thank you. PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #240

You've had excellent and informative posts on this thread. Don't let the assholes get you down. nt msanthrope Jan 2013 #251

thanks PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #284

I agree with msanthrope Tumbulu Jan 2013 #257

thanks, I don't understand how some can be so arrogant PeaceNikki Jan 2013 #285

Great post. redqueen Jan 2013 #248

And we the people pay for the court system, senseandsensibility Jan 2013 #252

There are a lot of legitimate lawsuits every day. Confusious Jan 2013 #280

I wish I could rec this post. justiceischeap Jan 2013 #283

"there are folks with zero clue whatsoever about what it really takes to see someone in court." snooper2 Jan 2013 #286

Forgot about THAT frivolous lawsuit. Confusious Jan 2013 #294

She should be free to bring her lawsuit. That doesn't mean every lawsuit should be taken seriously. NYC Liberal Jan 2013 #302

This message was self-deleted by its author thucythucy Jan 2013 #260

Crazy people on dating sites? LTR Jan 2013 #266

This is a dumb lawsuit, Jamaal510 Jan 2013 #273

Is it time for a Catfish-Manti Te'O-Match Bill? ecstatic Jan 2013 #293

The lawsuit is doing women a service. And men, too. DevonRex Jan 2013 #303

Good for her...1 million dollars for each stab wound. Auntie Bush Jan 2013 #305