My problem isn't self-identifying as a feminist in front of men, it's women

[boston bean]

89. In my book you are a feminist ally, I think from what you say.

Which means you are supportive of feminist ideals. And are very welcome to support feminists in their struggles, and we feminists are extremely grateful.

However, if as a man, you decide to tell me what feminism is, or how or what to focus on, or how to express myself, I might question if you fully understand feminism. Women deserve a place to focus on their issues from their perspective. Not that we always agree, but we have had many of the same experiences and know from where we came. Just like LGBT and ethnic groups have their allies.

Women should be able to own feminism without men co-opting the movement, by proclaiming themselves feminists and then proceed to tell women who are feminists what to do. If that were to happen that would be anti feminist.

A man who supports feminism should understand all of this.