Welcome to DU! The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards. Join the community: Create a free account Support DU (and get rid of ads!): Become a Star Member All Forums Issue Forums Culture Forums Alliance Forums Region Forums Support Forums Help & Search

calimary

(80,693 posts)
26. DEFINITELY an important post, and thread. I suppose I'm among the lucky ones - never to have
Sat Feb 16, 2013, 11:30 PM
Feb 2013

experienced that kind of horror you did, sheshe2. Thank you for sharing this. I can only imagine the anguish, day after day after day.

The VAWA simply MUST be passed. It amazes me to watch the republi-CONS stand so firmly against legislation like this - and then in the next breath they're turning around and scratching their heads, wondering why they're stuck in the ratings basement with women voters. NO DUH!!! And every last one of them has women in THEIR lives too. More infuriating, republi-CON women are against this too. It just doesn't compute for me. I don't get it. I do not get it. What the hell are they THINKING??????????

I am grateful every day that I never went through that or was exposed to it. My mother's father beat her and was abusive to her siblings, too. She'd tell me stories about going to school and feeling her skirt stick to the back of her thighs because he'd beaten her so badly she had weeping sores on the back of her legs. BASTARD. I always found it rather remarkable that, as scarred as she surely was by that, she never hit me. It stopped with her and never got passed on to me. She could be verbally abusive, and I realized early-on that the nursery rhyme "sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me" - is NOT true. Words CAN hurt. But she NEVER hit me. And for that I'm grateful and actually kind of proud of her. So many batterers learn it from their own parents and then pass it on.

And it just stunning to think - that somewhere in this country, at this moment I'm writing this or you're reading it - some woman is being beaten by someone close to her.

K&R I hope things are better for you now. MotherPetrie Feb 2013 #1
I am so sorry. I support this cause 100%. I am lucky Laura PourMeADrink Feb 2013 #2
Thank you Laura. sheshe2 Feb 2013 #4
100% Euphoria Feb 2013 #29
We can Stop this. We can! sheshe2 Feb 2013 #92
Real men are not cruel to women. Deep13 Feb 2013 #3
I am sure that really made SheShe feel better Laura PourMeADrink Feb 2013 #5
Thanks Laura. sheshe2 Feb 2013 #8
????????? nt Deep13 Feb 2013 #13
I know you didn't mean anything Laura PourMeADrink Feb 2013 #15
I was saddened somewhat and violence against women makes me angry... Deep13 Feb 2013 #87
I got what you were saying. GentryDixon Feb 2013 #120
Deep13... sheshe2 Feb 2013 #28
Sorry. Deep13 Feb 2013 #89
Deep13, I am so very sorry for what you suffered. sheshe2 Feb 2013 #165
Thanks. Deep13 Feb 2013 #169
Deep 13, although YOU did not intend tblue37 Feb 2013 #115
+10.000 smirkymonkey Feb 2013 #57
rec'd, kicked, signed, tweeted, facebooked.. annabanana Feb 2013 #6
Thank you anna. sheshe2 Feb 2013 #9
Oh, sheshe2... DollarBillHines Feb 2013 #7
Thank you DBH! sheshe2 Feb 2013 #31
Sounds similar to what I went through rurallib Feb 2013 #10
I am so sorry rurallib... sheshe2 Feb 2013 #12
oddly I had most of those memories repressed until rurallib Feb 2013 #19
Thanks for sharing that with DU. VAWA affects real women and they're being ignored. freshwest Feb 2013 #11
Oh do not make me cry, my dear freshwest. sheshe2 Feb 2013 #22
Look at this response -- you're helping the cause a LOT! gateley Feb 2013 #80
In 2010, a shocking 4,741,000 women were victims of domestic violence Bonobo Feb 2013 #14
For the sake of those of us that love stats littlemissmartypants Feb 2013 #27
Sure. Bonobo Feb 2013 #34
link says page not found. BlancheSplanchnik Feb 2013 #42
Worked for me, but here. again. Bonobo Feb 2013 #44
ok got it, Thanks. It was a download BlancheSplanchnik Feb 2013 #50
Per your CDC chart, 1 in 5 women are raped; 1 in 71 men are raped. SunSeeker Feb 2013 #97
Thank you! nt raccoon Feb 2013 #99
And it also includes "shoves". DURHAM D Feb 2013 #108
Yes. As they say, "there are lies, damn lies...and then there are statistics." nt SunSeeker Feb 2013 #112
Predictably pathetic Helen Reddy Feb 2013 #124
Thank you so very much, SunSeeker. sheshe2 Feb 2013 #138
You showed a lot of strength in baring your soul, sheshe. SunSeeker Feb 2013 #168
And it's also worth noting that Gormy Cuss Feb 2013 #143
No but as a volunteer at my local women's shelter I recognize the pain, suffering and grief riderinthestorm Feb 2013 #16
In that respect, yes I am...it was many years ago. sheshe2 Feb 2013 #43
I can't imagine what it's like to live in the presence of that physical violence; I do know about patrice Feb 2013 #17
I really do not know if one is any worse that the other. sheshe2 Feb 2013 #49
It took a lot of work to get as past as I am from all of the verbal abuse and tpsbmam Feb 2013 #18
Thank you tpsbmam. sheshe2 Feb 2013 #55
sheshe...I am ALWAYS amazed to see that threads on women's human rights tend to sink BlancheSplanchnik Feb 2013 #20
My father was abused as an old man in his 2nd marriage... Bonobo Feb 2013 #23
I am very sorry. I wonder, when minority folks post to raise awareness of their situation, BlancheSplanchnik Feb 2013 #25
I see no reason why age should redefine the issue. Bonobo Feb 2013 #35
I made some edits for clarity to my post. HOWEVER, you are missing my point BlancheSplanchnik Feb 2013 #37
I am not minimizing it. The opposite, in fact. Bonobo Feb 2013 #40
I DO NOT think a thread on the issue of male victims would be mocked. BlancheSplanchnik Feb 2013 #47
violence againt anyone is wrong CitizenPatriot Feb 2013 #125
Thank you! He always does this. nt raccoon Feb 2013 #100
Thank you Blanche... sheshe2 Feb 2013 #58
There are just as many, if not more, abusive human females Disconnect Feb 2013 #21
a "female tantrum" as you put it, is not equivalent to abuse by someone bigger & stronger who BlancheSplanchnik Feb 2013 #32
Again Blanche, thank you, for answering these posts, sheshe2 Feb 2013 #61
"As many, if not more" OldHippieChick Feb 2013 #45
It's a common MRA deflection.nt sufrommich Feb 2013 #107
Well, you certainly know how to win friends and influence enemies, don't you? nt. OldDem2012 Feb 2013 #54
BullSHIT. Zoeisright Feb 2013 #71
Get YOUR facts straight, not some ad hominem tantrum!!!! Disconnect Feb 2013 #153
Straight out of the MRA handbook. DURHAM D Feb 2013 #72
Where are the Equal Programss, Shelters for Battered Men?? Disconnect Feb 2013 #136
I have to wonder if the neighbors always call the police on this man? CitizenPatriot Feb 2013 #130
So where are the Battered Men's Shelters?? Disconnect Feb 2013 #135
You need a math class n/t CitizenPatriot Feb 2013 #160
Where are the men who gave up their jobs to raise children wickerwoman Feb 2013 #164
Another Ad Hominem Tantrum!!! Disconnect Feb 2013 #171
Bullshit Marrah_G Feb 2013 #151
You are full of shit alarimer Feb 2013 #162
No, dad would just hit me Demo_Chris Feb 2013 #24
I am so so sorry Tumbulu Feb 2013 #59
Yeah, it's a sad thread. Thanks for the response Demo_Chris Feb 2013 #62
'tis. good to see so much compassion, though BlancheSplanchnik Feb 2013 #88
Funny you mention that... Demo_Chris Feb 2013 #93
I've read that yes, it is related. raccoon Feb 2013 #101
I could not sleep last night- reading the threads Tumbulu Feb 2013 #163
In my family it was my mom and me. redqueen Feb 2013 #139
IKHO it's a survival strategy. Gormy Cuss Feb 2013 #144
DEFINITELY an important post, and thread. I suppose I'm among the lucky ones - never to have calimary Feb 2013 #26
Signed the petition UtahLib Feb 2013 #30
You are a brave person, I hope things are better for you now kairos12 Feb 2013 #33
yes, here is my horrible experience with violence against women Puzzledtraveller Feb 2013 #36
god..... BlancheSplanchnik Feb 2013 #85
No, but as a medic I saw plenty nadinbrzezinski Feb 2013 #38
Thank you nadin, thank you so much! nt sheshe2 Feb 2013 #63
Le Taz Hot Feb 2013 #39
I'm hugging you tight right now, sheshe2 ReRe Feb 2013 #41
You got that right, ReRe....Let's get in the right millenn!ium sheshe2 Feb 2013 #69
I am sorry that you had to go through this, Curmudgeoness Feb 2013 #46
... sheshe2 Feb 2013 #70
Yes, it has, sheshe2. Control-Z Feb 2013 #48
OMG! I clicked on your link and I am so sorry! smirkymonkey Feb 2013 #60
Oh, Control-Z sheshe2 Feb 2013 #73
No words. JNelson6563 Feb 2013 #98
O.M.G. Helen Reddy Feb 2013 #126
Thank you. n/t pnwmom Feb 2013 #51
Your action got my signature. iemitsu Feb 2013 #52
You are welcome, iemitsu. sheshe2 Feb 2013 #77
Since victims of abuse or witnesses to abuse iemitsu Feb 2013 #91
Thanks for posting this fadedrose Feb 2013 #53
Former shelter volunteer here. Ilsa Feb 2013 #56
... sheshe2 Feb 2013 #142
Thank you, sheshe2 -- gateley Feb 2013 #64
Thanks gateley.... sheshe2 Feb 2013 #79
I can understand your reluctance to post this, but look at all the others who gateley Feb 2013 #82
gateley...your petition was a tipping point for me... sheshe2 Feb 2013 #86
Signed Gemini Cat Feb 2013 #65
Thank you, thank you, thank you PatSeg Feb 2013 #66
I saw your post PatSeg...and I thank you for that! nt sheshe2 Feb 2013 #173
I once went to the ER with a bloody nose TexasBushwhacker Feb 2013 #67
My siblings and I lived that nightmare, and worse. Most of the abuse was verbal, but he did Flatulo Feb 2013 #68
I weep for you, Flatulo sheshe2 Feb 2013 #75
The important thing is to break the cycle, as I have done. Flatulo Feb 2013 #78
We can break the cycle...yes . We can! sheshe2 Feb 2013 #81
I signed the petition. ohheckyeah Feb 2013 #74
Hi, ohheckyeah...and thank you! sheshe2 Feb 2013 #83
You're welcome. ohheckyeah Feb 2013 #84
Thank you for posting this.. bama_blue_dot Feb 2013 #76
For your children, you must leave usrbs Feb 2013 #102
Thank you bama_blue_dot Feb 2013 #103
I stayed years later than I should have in a bad marriage usrbs Feb 2013 #104
+100 wickerwoman Feb 2013 #166
:( Fire Walk With Me Feb 2013 #90
I want to see, and I think it's now possible we could see, an explosion snot Feb 2013 #94
Done, sheshe! pacalo Feb 2013 #95
K&R & signed! SunSeeker Feb 2013 #96
morning kick Laura PourMeADrink Feb 2013 #105
DONE. derby378 Feb 2013 #106
Done! WinstonSmith4740 Feb 2013 #109
This message was self-deleted by its author OldDem2012 Feb 2013 #110
I'm so sorry this cruel child abuse happened to you. I wish there was someone there AnotherMother4Peace Feb 2013 #117
I'm sorry...I understand the statistics, but I didn't know where else to share my story.... OldDem2012 Feb 2013 #118
One of my favorite movie quotes: "Some of us have great stories, pretty stories. That AnotherMother4Peace Feb 2013 #119
Yes - My dad was cruel & assaulted my mom many times. I kept many secrets as AnotherMother4Peace Feb 2013 #111
Thanks. lunatica Feb 2013 #113
Men not only need to stand up for women, they need to make it clear to other men rhett o rick Feb 2013 #114
This thread is heartbreaking. redwitch Feb 2013 #116
Since I'm pretty old. I'm familiar with how men thought in the past. Cleita Feb 2013 #121
Yes. LWolf Feb 2013 #122
I was never a victim of domestic abuse. RebelOne Feb 2013 #123
You were a victim of abuse, passive abuse. Cleita Feb 2013 #127
I've only been through it from your mother's side, not yours kdmorris Feb 2013 #128
Done... Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #129
like 129 malokvale77 Feb 2013 #131
sheshe.. Cha Feb 2013 #132
Oh, Cha, you too? sheshe2 Feb 2013 #147
You are amazing Number23 Feb 2013 #133
Thank you, Number23! sheshe2 Feb 2013 #148
Sheshe, you've done well in this thread. I don't talk online about such things as I can't do it. freshwest Feb 2013 #134
... sheshe2 Feb 2013 #149
Nothing as dramatic as that and I'm scarred. It's total BS that anyone who would not support strong Dark n Stormy Knight Feb 2013 #137
Men have Domestic Violence perpetrated against them by Human Females, the opposite sex also!!! Disconnect Feb 2013 #140
Don't. Be. So. Sure. J/S. WinkyDink Feb 2013 #141
To Mr. Disconnect Helen Reddy Feb 2013 #145
Good gawd, no! Iggo Feb 2013 #146
signed - Thanks for your bravery! flying_wahini Feb 2013 #150
It has. Scootaloo Feb 2013 #152
I do, Scootaloo. sheshe2 Feb 2013 #154
I got lucky as a child, I guess LadyHawkAZ Feb 2013 #155
Oh, LadyHawk. sheshe2 Feb 2013 #156
I haven't seen him in 16 years LadyHawkAZ Feb 2013 #157
Signing. davidthegnome Feb 2013 #158
I understand rickyhall Feb 2013 #159
So very sorry, rickyhall. sheshe2 Feb 2013 #161
Fuck the knuckle draggers sigmasix Feb 2013 #167
K & R Quantess Feb 2013 #170
Here is a video that explains VAWA Disconnect Feb 2013 #172
I'm sorry that you went through this, sheshe. No child should be part of violence. In_The_Wind Mar 2013 #174
I often wonder if there is a woman alive who hasn't been abused by some male, Sekhmets Daughter Mar 2013 #175
imo: In_The_Wind Mar 2013 #176
Good Lord... Sekhmets Daughter Mar 2013 #177
indeed In_The_Wind Mar 2013 #178
Healing Power...yep Sekhmets Daughter Mar 2013 #179
Sad but true and I am so very sorry! sheshe2 Mar 2013 #181
Thanks sheshe2 Sekhmets Daughter Mar 2013 #182
So true....sad but true. And Thank you! sheshe2 Mar 2013 #183
Thank You! Sekhmets Daughter Mar 2013 #184
Been there 2naSalit Mar 2013 #180
Latest Discussions»General Discussion»Has this ever happened to...»Reply #26