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Butterbean

(1,014 posts)

123. I don't have a dog in this fight, but I do think it's unreasonable

Thu Feb 21, 2013, 08:57 PM

Feb 2013

to expect the family to call the restaurant in advance. Just speaking from the position of special needs mom, that's just plain unrealistic and for a reason I can't quite articulate yet (it's the end of the day, my brain isn't working that quickly...sorry), the idea that they should have to do such a thing makes me really cringe.

One of my best girlfriends has a severely developmentally delayed child who can sometimes have public outbursts and do inappropriate things. My girlfriend does try to have a developmental therapist remain with her child when she has to run errands or go out, because it genuinely upsets her child to have to leave "her" space. However, life happens and sometimes there is no DT and my friend has to take her child with her, and predictably, her child erupts and acts out. Should my girlfriend have to call ahead to every place she is going to go to on her errands to warn them about her child? The tantrums can be quite violent, and strangers have approached my friend when her child was mid-tantrum and made very ugly comments to her. Still...this is her life. She can't spend her life walking on eggshells around other people because of her kid's disability, kwim?

I dunno. I'm taking this all too personally, which means I just need to step away, methinks.

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Family Kicked Out Of Golden Corral Restaurant Over Children's Skin Disorder [View all] The Straight Story Feb 2013 OP

america, america god shed his....... spanone Feb 2013 #1

A disorder that looks like a contagious disease? lumberjack_jeff Feb 2013 #2

Really? Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #6

I don't think the situations are analagous. lumberjack_jeff Feb 2013 #8

And if told the child's condition was not contagious Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #9

I don't know. lumberjack_jeff Feb 2013 #11

The article said the mother Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #12

Yes. I read that and understand that this is what the plaintiff alleges. n/t lumberjack_jeff Feb 2013 #15

Ah, so you think the DOJ Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #16

Hey, this is one of our resident authoritarian liberalhistorian Feb 2013 #19

Post removed Post removed Feb 2013 #21

Well, I just found a post Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #25

Link please? lumberjack_jeff Feb 2013 #28

Still waiting. n/t lumberjack_jeff Feb 2013 #29

Get a grip and then get lost.... Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #33

LOL, thanks! liberalhistorian Feb 2013 #135

You're most definitely welcome. :-) Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #146

Bang. trumad Feb 2013 #202

Good Morning Trumad... Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #233

You could head over and vote for the hottest celeb... trumad Feb 2013 #266

LOL Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #274

here's a link where you justify that women should pay more for health insurance than men CreekDog Feb 2013 #186

Bullshit! liberalhistorian Feb 2013 #133

Hey thanks for the heads up! Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #22

You don't want your "head up" in the sense that LH does. lumberjack_jeff Feb 2013 #26

I would say that your admission liberalhistorian Feb 2013 #136

Does that include cutting out ovaries of moms who don't pay child support???? Manifestor_of_Light Feb 2013 #289

I wouldn't know... Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #290

he also thinks women should pay for more health insurance than men CreekDog Feb 2013 #182

As another resident apologist for the police treestar Feb 2013 #209

It has everything to do with it. Because liberalhistorian Feb 2013 #222

But the issue still stands, separate from him treestar Feb 2013 #223

courts judge. lumberjack_jeff Feb 2013 #24

And if you can't trust the DOJ, who can you trust? cthulu2016 Feb 2013 #32

No one... Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #35

I work with kids with all kinds of disabilities. I see your point and like you, I would ask the Squinch Feb 2013 #131

Picture will bring tears to your eyes. EastKYLiberal Feb 2013 #10

Looks like chicken pox... Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #13

Golden Corral doesn't have waiters. grantcart Feb 2013 #36

But that's exactly what the ADA is all about: marybourg Feb 2013 #71

Someone from the restaurant should have gotten the children their food. KamaAina Feb 2013 #93

the report doesn't indicate whether or not that option or the option of the parents getting the food grantcart Feb 2013 #102

Some people would argue.... ProudToBeBlueInRhody Feb 2013 #144

It was extremely easy for Chipotle to lower the counters KamaAina Feb 2013 #145

The "proper height" might change.... ProudToBeBlueInRhody Feb 2013 #221

As it happens, many little people do use wheelchairs KamaAina Feb 2013 #256

Do you have a cite for that case? thucythucy Feb 2013 #230

Here you go ProudToBeBlueInRhody Feb 2013 #234

Thanks! thucythucy Feb 2013 #240

After seeing this, I don't blame the owner LittleBlue Feb 2013 #134

The ADA was specifically written thucythucy Feb 2013 #150

I don't think that is reasonable LittleBlue Feb 2013 #157

This "we" thucythucy Feb 2013 #176

You don't have an argument anymore Shivering Jemmy Feb 2013 #208

I agree with you 110%thucythucy undergroundpanther Feb 2013 #188

Thank you. treestar Feb 2013 #210

Thanks thucythucy! Scruffy Rumbler Feb 2013 #257

you don't even know the law that protects the disabled CreekDog Feb 2013 #163

I feel bad for the little guy davidpdx Feb 2013 #177

Poor little guy treestar Feb 2013 #207

It looks like a condition that IS acutely contagious Yo_Mama Feb 2013 #34

It looks like chicken pox in the picture... Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #45

Impetigo is what it looks like. Yo_Mama Feb 2013 #49

And you see no other alternative? Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #54

I think the mother should get a medical statement from a doctor Yo_Mama Feb 2013 #61

One hopes she will. Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #64

Well, depending on what happened Yo_Mama Feb 2013 #68

I don't blame him for asking. I blame him Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #69

Because every kid I've known with it has been tossed from school, daycare etc. Yo_Mama Feb 2013 #77

But the article doesn't say when Robinson made that assertion. Sekhmets Daughter Feb 2013 #81

so now people who look like they may have a contagious disease need to carry papers? liberal_at_heart Feb 2013 #82

Agree KatyMan Feb 2013 #125

IMO it was not intended that way treestar Feb 2013 #212

Right. The kids had the right to be there. n/t Yo_Mama Feb 2013 #248

yes, the disabled should carry papers, right, why isn't your post hidden? CreekDog Feb 2013 #174

No, the disabled do not need papers Yo_Mama Feb 2013 #250

"This shouldn't be a disability" --who do you think you are? CreekDog Feb 2013 #258

I meant that our society should see that prejudice doesn't turn it into one Yo_Mama Feb 2013 #260

Well, hey, why don't people liberalhistorian Feb 2013 #246

That is very wrong... Javaman Feb 2013 #275

I know the condition the kids had isn't contagious Yo_Mama Feb 2013 #284

Anything with some open sores could be contagious. pnwmom Feb 2013 #52

No, it's not contagious.. Javaman Feb 2013 #276

You obviously didn't bother to read my actual post, pnwmom Feb 2013 #286

Like maybe impetigo Yo_Mama Feb 2013 #30

I had impetigo as a kid .... oldhippie Feb 2013 #41

My younger brother had one tiny lesion Yo_Mama Feb 2013 #46

I'd be much more inclined to listen to a doctor about a disorder that looks like a contagious diseas LanternWaste Feb 2013 #50

It's very simple Canuckistanian Feb 2013 #53

"How was I to know she had Typhoid?" lumberjack_jeff Feb 2013 #63

The case you're citing thucythucy Feb 2013 #83

you can't expect that poster to know anything about laws protecting the disabled can you? CreekDog Feb 2013 #164

Please do tell us what a contagious disease "looks like". kestrel91316 Feb 2013 #84

As far as I know, cranial-rectal inversion disorder isn't contagious. lumberjack_jeff Feb 2013 #103

And if you are worried about it, then you DON'T TOUCH that child. kestrel91316 Feb 2013 #175

+1 nt Javaman Feb 2013 #277

My sister and niece have this genetic disease. They are in pain every day from it. No, it is not Scruffy Rumbler Feb 2013 #138

My cousin's children has this southern_belle Feb 2013 #153

Hi southern_belle, Scruffy Rumbler Feb 2013 #172

Thank you southern_belle Feb 2013 #220

who cares what you think? it's the law CreekDog Feb 2013 #151

well you are also failing to advocate for the disabled CreekDog Feb 2013 #161

Once they had been assured that the kids weren't contagious Warpy Feb 2013 #3

And if the mother lied, and other diners were infected with impetigo? X_Digger Feb 2013 #44

Yes, the manager would be blameless jeff47 Feb 2013 #75

But who has the deeper pockets customerserviceguy Feb 2013 #100

If the restaurant owner decides to settle, they'd be paying jeff47 Feb 2013 #127

Riiiight. Any personal injury attorney would wipe the floor with him. X_Digger Feb 2013 #106

Based on what? jeff47 Feb 2013 #129

Proximate cause + reasonable person test X_Digger Feb 2013 #140

You'll notice that your quote from the ADA says thucythucy Feb 2013 #148

Reasonableness was re liability, not the ADA. X_Digger Feb 2013 #155

Didja notice the major hole in your statement? jeff47 Feb 2013 #156

Again, you think that the mother's statement has legal weight. X_Digger Feb 2013 #160

Can you sue someone for refusing to disobey federal law? thucythucy Feb 2013 #168

Negligence / liability cases are civil cases.. X_Digger Feb 2013 #228

Sorry, but in my opinion a judge thucythucy Feb 2013 #236

That would be for the defense to argue. X_Digger Feb 2013 #241

Well, at this point this is all thucythucy Feb 2013 #242

Yup, so much angels-on-heads-of-pins (for the hypothetical we were discussing). X_Digger Feb 2013 #245

Continuing the hypothetical kudzu22 Feb 2013 #251

Your argument is the reason he can ask. jeff47 Feb 2013 #159

If I handed you a gun and said, "It isn't loaded." and you point it at a bystander.. X_Digger Feb 2013 #162

Even if I was comfortable comparing kids with disabilities to loaded weapons, thucythucy Feb 2013 #226

It was a stretch, yes. I struggled to find an analogous situation.. X_Digger Feb 2013 #232

Because it is reasonable for me to check if the gun is loaded myself. jeff47 Feb 2013 #271

No, because it's not reasonable to point a gun at someone and pull the trigger, regardless.. X_Digger Feb 2013 #273

Again, the manager isn't in any position to doubt her story. jeff47 Feb 2013 #282

He has no qualifications to disprove *or* corroborate her statement. X_Digger Feb 2013 #283

There isn't a basis to kick them out. Yo_Mama Feb 2013 #253

there's this thing called the law against discrimination CreekDog Feb 2013 #165

I've read it, all of it, thanks. n/t X_Digger Feb 2013 #235

I Googled what this looks like and have to say, for a manager of a buffet-style restaurant . . . Journeyman Feb 2013 #4

I agree. The manager was stuck between a rock and a hard place. n/t pnwmom Feb 2013 #55

Possibly by doing just what you did; googling marybourg Feb 2013 #72

Not to put too fine a point to it, but . . . Journeyman Feb 2013 #85

Nonsense. Union Scribe Feb 2013 #190

Exactly. people coughing, sneezing openly and doing whatever else are for more contagious than a Javaman Feb 2013 #278

I'm sorry. I have all the sympathy SouthernDonkey Feb 2013 #5

If there were any chance of this sort of thing being a public health threat in a kestrel91316 Feb 2013 #95

+1. And don't forget diabetics who test on their fingers Union Scribe Feb 2013 #169

This whole thread is really unbelievable. nt laundry_queen Feb 2013 #227

It truly is. Javaman Feb 2013 #279

Or people with cold sores, or even sunburn obamanut2012 Feb 2013 #191

Please! Get real! SouthernDonkey Feb 2013 #291

That's truly unfortunate. MineralMan Feb 2013 #7

Parents could have alleviated the situation by contacting the manager SoCalDem Feb 2013 #14

Carrying documentation would help jberryhill Feb 2013 #59

Who would file the lawsuit? thucythucy Feb 2013 #86

In your hypothetical, the reataurant could be held liable jberryhill Feb 2013 #147

Perhaps in my hypothetical, but the more I think about this case thucythucy Feb 2013 #149

ah, recommending people violate the ADA CreekDog Feb 2013 #183

I am certainly familiar with that law jberryhill Feb 2013 #204

well the disability was explained to the person who made the decision CreekDog Feb 2013 #269

It's going to unfold the way most lawsuits do jberryhill Feb 2013 #206

Who else should carry papers -- AIDS patients? Albinos? obamanut2012 Feb 2013 #192

When you have a condition easily mistaken for something else? jberryhill Feb 2013 #205

So if you "look sick", your papers, please? Occulus Feb 2013 #259

'Reserving the right to refuse anyone" doesn't allow them to discriminate Gormy Cuss Feb 2013 #67

Thank you -- it amazes me that people think that's allowed obamanut2012 Feb 2013 #193

you had to type a lot because it takes more words to explain BS CreekDog Feb 2013 #185

Well, would the manager have thrown out someone who sneezed? jeff47 Feb 2013 #17

Most likely not. I've never seen that happen. MineralMan Feb 2013 #18

So why is it ok to toss these kids out? jeff47 Feb 2013 #20

Where did I say it was OK? MineralMan Feb 2013 #39

Back up in post #7 jeff47 Feb 2013 #70

Are you being serious? cthulu2016 Feb 2013 #40

Your complains would be the reason to ASK what's going on. Not throw them out. jeff47 Feb 2013 #73

A sneeze is much less likely to result in a serious infection pnwmom Feb 2013 #58

Because the manager knows the health status of all customers in the restaurant? jeff47 Feb 2013 #74

A sneeze is usually a one-off. No customer who arrives later will even notice. pnwmom Feb 2013 #76

Not when someone is suffering from a cold jeff47 Feb 2013 #79

�Anyone with such a defiling disease must wear torn clothes Union Scribe Feb 2013 #173

How about coughing people? Union Scribe Feb 2013 #170

Except for all the people who walk through the droplets in the air, get influenza and then uppityperson Feb 2013 #247

I agree kudzu22 Feb 2013 #252

I would have compromised here... cthulu2016 Feb 2013 #23

Ah! Finally a post worthy of a toast! Vinnie From Indy Feb 2013 #31

Which is discrimation obamanut2012 Feb 2013 #194

Some compromise could have been worked out. geek tragedy Feb 2013 #27

Yes, he is. KatyMan Feb 2013 #38

purity trolling or are you serious? cthulu2016 Feb 2013 #43

I assume that the cook KatyMan Feb 2013 #48

Yes, s/he legally is obamanut2012 Feb 2013 #195

Nice to see such compassion here KatyMan Feb 2013 #37

How do you know that manager wasn't concerned about the spread of disease? pnwmom Feb 2013 #57

He wasn't worried about spreading germs KatyMan Feb 2013 #87

Other restaurant patrons won't know this. pnwmom Feb 2013 #126

what does it matter KatyMan Feb 2013 #128

It matters to the restaurant if other customers leave. n/t pnwmom Feb 2013 #137

Too bad obamanut2012 Feb 2013 #197

That doesn't matter obamanut2012 Feb 2013 #196

Hi Katyman, Scruffy Rumbler Feb 2013 #142

people often feel justified in their prejudices. does not mean they are justifiable. liberal_at_heart Feb 2013 #92

well said and many times KatyMan Feb 2013 #94

I'm sure you're quite right about that. liberal_at_heart Feb 2013 #99

my sentiments exactly liberal_at_heart Feb 2013 #89

Sounds like lots of DUers would have me thrown out of places too Union Scribe Feb 2013 #167

I actually thought of psoriasis or eczema obamanut2012 Feb 2013 #198

sadly you are probably correct liberal_at_heart Feb 2013 #216

It sound like a lot of DUers don't believe anyone makes honest mistakes jberryhill Feb 2013 #218

You win the thread. ElboRuum Feb 2013 #287

And, hypothetically, if the mom was lying about her children's condition... sadbear Feb 2013 #42

The law doesn't work that way obamanut2012 Feb 2013 #199

You think lawyers give a shit about the law? sadbear Feb 2013 #219

This concept of the mother lying about it treestar Feb 2013 #213

The restaurant was most likely trying to err on the side of caution. OceanEcosystem Feb 2013 #47

I'm sure SOMEBODY must have been able to use Wikipedia on their smartphone. n/t Ian David Feb 2013 #51

And when other customers quietly walked out after seeing them -- just to be on the pnwmom Feb 2013 #56

Sorry, but this same argument was used thucythucy Feb 2013 #91

It was used against AIDS patients obamanut2012 Feb 2013 #200

Because chain restaurant managers are trained in wiki telemedicine jberryhill Feb 2013 #60

Did you just say Wikipedia? sadbear Feb 2013 #62

I think so too, but I think a doctor's letter that the mother could take with her could solve that Yo_Mama Feb 2013 #65

And that would be a reason to ask. jeff47 Feb 2013 #78

You've apparently never been to the Golden Corral in my area. sadbear Feb 2013 #80

Great post! thucythucy Feb 2013 #178

I personally know a family with this condition. Butterbean Feb 2013 #66

fear of the unknown plain and simple. The problem with that is that it leads to prejudice and liberal_at_heart Feb 2013 #88

There is no right and wrong here. Unfortunately the many over the few wins in this situation. The Pisces Feb 2013 #90

in this case there is a right and wrong KatyMan Feb 2013 #96

The manager is just suppose to take her word for it and not believe his lying eyes? You are faced Pisces Feb 2013 #139

Yes, he legally is obamanut2012 Feb 2013 #201

This is for all those who cite the manager having to worry thucythucy Feb 2013 #97

I don't think that business considerations are the issue for anyone discussing the point here. lumberjack_jeff Feb 2013 #104

A resonable person KatyMan Feb 2013 #109

Several people have posted expressing thucythucy Feb 2013 #120

Agree! :) KatyMan Feb 2013 #122

my husband is legally blind. You would not believe how many employees are not educated on ADA. liberal_at_heart Feb 2013 #224

You may have already thought of this thucythucy Feb 2013 #249

oh, he has the contact information of the building manager liberal_at_heart Feb 2013 #263

girls were kicked out CreekDog Feb 2013 #171

Thank you so much KatyMan Feb 2013 #105

I don't think it is okay to make excuses for this Restaurant. The children suffering this condition Douglas Carpenter Feb 2013 #98

I think the suit is a poor use of federal Justice Department resources. slackmaster Feb 2013 #101

what else could the family have done? KatyMan Feb 2013 #107

They could have cleared it in advance with the manager, or... slackmaster Feb 2013 #108

You are wrong on many levels KatyMan Feb 2013 #110

I think it's unreasonable for the family to expect every business manager to have knowledge... slackmaster Feb 2013 #112

are you missing the part about the mother educating the manager? KatyMan Feb 2013 #113

Why should the manager be expected take the word of a stranger? slackmaster Feb 2013 #115

Because he asked her KatyMan Feb 2013 #117

OK, you've wandered into Straw Man territory. slackmaster Feb 2013 #118

I don't have a dog in this fight, but I do think it's unreasonable Butterbean Feb 2013 #123

Sorry, slackmaster, but since 1990 thucythucy Feb 2013 #130

"the restaurant management does have the right to refuse to seat or serve anyone for any reason. " KatyMan Feb 2013 #111

See reply #112. Racial minorities are specifically protected groups under federal law. slackmaster Feb 2013 #114

Read the American for Disabilities Act KatyMan Feb 2013 #116

Only to the extent that the restaurant manager could be reasonably expected to know that. slackmaster Feb 2013 #119

Do you not think KatyMan Feb 2013 #121

I'm open to the possibility that the manager may have feared that the child had Hansen's Disease... slackmaster Feb 2013 #124

A child running around with untreated and contagious thucythucy Feb 2013 #132

Some parents have been known to misrepresent their children's illnesses REP Feb 2013 #141

In a case like that you should call thucythucy Feb 2013 #152

And those around her and them. REP Feb 2013 #158

I'm going to go out on a limb here... TeeYiYi Feb 2013 #143

I agree. eom Purveyor Feb 2013 #154

Yeah, better keep him inside locked away from the normals. Union Scribe Feb 2013 #166

i think he is adorable JI7 Feb 2013 #180

+1 treestar Feb 2013 #214

When my kids had chicken pox laundry_queen Feb 2013 #238

I agree treestar Feb 2013 #239

Look at that smile. You are right. He is adorable. liberal_at_heart Feb 2013 #225

I agree. Apophis Feb 2013 #187

thanks Dr. Frist CreekDog Feb 2013 #189

The manager's position was understandable. Quantess Feb 2013 #203

Many DUers lack the ability to recognize simple misunderstandings jberryhill Feb 2013 #217

yes those of us who know someone with a disability get tired of seeing them discriminated against liberal_at_heart Feb 2013 #229

I don't know anyone with a disability, is that what you are saying? jberryhill Feb 2013 #268

yes, the manager was informed of the condition and kicked the kids out for other customers' comfort CreekDog Feb 2013 #270

Well I'll tell you something from personal experience jberryhill Feb 2013 #272

This message was self-deleted by its author thucythucy Feb 2013 #288

I am with the manager - people lie - I had to touch someone and asked about their scabs 2Design Feb 2013 #179

Golden Corral is for fat rethug rednecks mwrguy Feb 2013 #181

Well, if that's the case.... ProudToBeBlueInRhody Feb 2013 #244

What the fuck is wrong with people? What do you want? Leper colonies to return? Humanist_Activist Feb 2013 #184

well that's a little stronger I would put it..but yes some of the attitudes here are fucking sick Douglas Carpenter Feb 2013 #211

I agree with you liberal_at_heart Feb 2013 #215

maybe society itself has become so utterly depraved that siding with power and privilege Douglas Carpenter Feb 2013 #231

the ADA treaty vote failed just months ago --so your point is correct CreekDog Feb 2013 #237

just knowing someone who is disabled doesn't mean you know what they are going through liberal_at_heart Feb 2013 #243

The manager shows what we know to be true about America. Rex Feb 2013 #254

So true Rex, Scruffy Rumbler Feb 2013 #262

Wow, yeah that is horrible. Rex Feb 2013 #267

Meanwhile, in restaurants across America... AndyA Feb 2013 #255

how about just minding our own business and not worrying about what other people look like liberal_at_heart Feb 2013 #261

There's a big difference between dressing to impress and basic hygiene AndyA Feb 2013 #264

I just can't take the disgusting posts on this thread anymore. this is going in the trash. liberal_at_heart Feb 2013 #265

the lack of compassion displayed by some posters in this thread is absolutely appalling... Javaman Feb 2013 #280

I wore long sleeves and pants in South Florida HockeyMom Feb 2013 #281

Cool bath with sea salts... Javaman Feb 2013 #285