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OutNow

(916 posts)

84. Hit mine at 42

Fri Feb 22, 2013, 02:43 PM

Feb 2013

I'm not sure if it was a mid life crisis or a reaction to the end of my marriage. At 42 I felt hopeless, nothing to look forward to except getting older, etc. I was seeing a counselor to help deal with it. After a few sessions he asked if there was anything I had wanted to do in life but hadn't done it. It seemed selfish during my marriage but I always wanted to buy a sailboat since I had learned to sail as a teenager.

There was no reason not to do it, so with some prodding from my counselor I did it. It became a great hobby and taught me to go where the wind took me rather than trying to control everything. That's a valuable lesson! I also met my current wife while sailing in the Caribbean.

PS. I'm glad I bought a boat rather than a Corvette!

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wall of midlife crisis. when did you hit it and how did you make it thru. edited... [View all] seabeyond Feb 2013 OP

I'm only 38 but I think I'm kind of in mine titaniumsalute Feb 2013 #1

good question. I am not there yet but like all crisis i am sure i will handle it okay loli phabay Feb 2013 #2

wink... seabeyond Feb 2013 #14

lol i live to obey loli phabay Feb 2013 #18

First of all be thankful. cbrer Feb 2013 #3

rofl do people really buy a sports car loli phabay Feb 2013 #4

Hard to say. I'm having my third MLC... cbrer Feb 2013 #8

i get the going fast thing but i regularly burn up the highway going that fast. even had to slow dow loli phabay Feb 2013 #12

I've lost too many friends on the street. cbrer Feb 2013 #16

i like going fast, too. the only real risk taking i do in life. seabeyond Feb 2013 #19

the charger always feels like the tail wants to slide ine the corners once you hit 120 loli phabay Feb 2013 #23

h ahahah. ya, i have done a 360 in the middle of the hiway avoiding a squirrel. lol seabeyond Feb 2013 #25

lol avoiding a squirrel. i always hit skunks and i never even see them until its to late loli phabay Feb 2013 #27

lol. your third??? NOOooooo. lol. nt seabeyond Feb 2013 #17

I think they really do, those that can afford it that is. I think I know why too. ChisolmTrailDem Feb 2013 #66

I am 47 ellie Feb 2013 #5

I'm 47 too. Bonobo Feb 2013 #6

Although you did make one huge midlife change by Lydia Leftcoast Feb 2013 #62

It was. Thanks. Bonobo Feb 2013 #67

I am using the power of denial, backed by spending money on things I don't need el_bryanto Feb 2013 #7

This. Also, talking louder is working for me. Robb Feb 2013 #10

ah bryant, i love "power of denial" though i never use that and believe in exactly the opposite. seabeyond Feb 2013 #21

i will say one thing ive never seen a sad ostrich so it might work. loli phabay Feb 2013 #24

Didn't experience it as a wall Brainstormy Feb 2013 #9

It's a wall? MindPilot Feb 2013 #11

a long dark hallway that keeps getting longer. seabeyond Feb 2013 #22

no crisis bigtree Feb 2013 #13

single and childless pretty much all my adult life, no crisis here... KG Feb 2013 #15

Crises? ismnotwasm Feb 2013 #20

Burned down my emotional house Protalker Feb 2013 #26

i really like that. "a new sounder more authentic self " seabeyond Feb 2013 #28

oh oh i am going to annoy you here. i think thats to broad a statement yes many do loli phabay Feb 2013 #30

this is true. and you will never convince me men do not have or feel. seabeyond Feb 2013 #31

i agree a bit. guys just express them differently some in a non traditional way loli phabay Feb 2013 #34

thanks loli. good post. nt seabeyond Feb 2013 #39

same way I got through most problems. hobbit709 Feb 2013 #29

ha hahahaha. lol. seabeyond Feb 2013 #33

my personal take on the "midlife crisis" (I will be 50 this year) Javaman Feb 2013 #32

I never followed the path of how society believes I should act or live my life. seabeyond Feb 2013 #38

i am pretty sure im well outside of normal and i liked the post as well loli phabay Feb 2013 #45

+1 Sissyk Feb 2013 #54

What midlife crisis? MadHound Feb 2013 #35

This message was self-deleted by its author Helen Reddy Feb 2013 #36

I'm 37 and I've already dealt with dreams not coming true liberal_at_heart Feb 2013 #37

good post. old wives wisdom is that to be content is to be happy loli phabay Feb 2013 #41

I would be happy with the life I have led. love and peace are far more important to me now seabeyond Feb 2013 #42

Similar issues here... PasadenaTrudy Feb 2013 #56

I can beat that. Le Taz Hot Feb 2013 #105

Exactly! PasadenaTrudy Feb 2013 #106

Another DUer posted this link Le Taz Hot Feb 2013 #107

Don't think I've had it yet newfie11 Feb 2013 #40

lol... its a comin' i am tellin' ya. seabeyond Feb 2013 #43

Oh bummer newfie11 Feb 2013 #83

43 abelenkpe Feb 2013 #44

Mine happened at age 45. MineralMan Feb 2013 #46

wow. You dealt with that very well. liberal_at_heart Feb 2013 #47

I learned from my father. MineralMan Feb 2013 #50

wow. you stopped me in my tracks this morning pnwest Feb 2013 #48

Just stop. Stop thinking, fighting, controlling...and just start listening. seabeyond Feb 2013 #49

:) pnwest Feb 2013 #51

My husband and I both have been through Sissyk Feb 2013 #52

thank you seabeyond Feb 2013 #58

Go into a small manageable business that you own and run KurtNYC Feb 2013 #53

49 PasadenaTrudy Feb 2013 #55

I think I must have missed mine .... oldhippie Feb 2013 #57

Mine seemed to kick in early samplegirl Feb 2013 #59

Mine came earlier. I was in my early 40s and Lydia Leftcoast Feb 2013 #60

I'm female but worried more about the money aspect treestar Feb 2013 #61

The Mr. (at 55 years old) bought a pair of white snake~skin cowboy boots.. Tikki Feb 2013 #63

lol! Sissyk Feb 2013 #64

Now at 65 years old...they match his hair... Tikki Feb 2013 #65

I don't think my husband or I have gone through one yet... maybe never? riderinthestorm Feb 2013 #68

I decided that I don't give a flying fuck what anyone thinks about me slackmaster Feb 2013 #69

I am in the middle of mine WCIL Feb 2013 #70

Built a house in South America. Puglover Feb 2013 #71

A well defined Midlife Crisis marions ghost Feb 2013 #72

very VERY good post marions.... seabeyond Feb 2013 #73

thanks seabeyond marions ghost Feb 2013 #75

Had one at age 40 and in one now steve2470 Feb 2013 #74

I learned this. When life sucks you have to not give up. upaloopa Feb 2013 #76

The law of attraction: "like attracts like" seabeyond Feb 2013 #78

I got two unexpected checks the last two weeks. Not big ones upaloopa Feb 2013 #79

Message auto-removed year of the cat Feb 2013 #82

I went back donco Feb 2013 #77

I turn 50 tomorrow and feel like it is right in my face. Father in law died last week at 92 and.... yourout Feb 2013 #80

Fifty hit me hard.I think it's sufrommich Feb 2013 #86

for me it's a combination of physical changes and realizing I probably have more years behind me.... yourout Feb 2013 #94

happy 50 and.... seabeyond Feb 2013 #88

best wishes for you, hopefully better right after 50 ! nt steve2470 Feb 2013 #90

when i started having to wear glasses shanti Feb 2013 #81

Hit mine at 42 OutNow Feb 2013 #84

that sounds lovely. nt seabeyond Feb 2013 #93

44. lasted a few years. MadrasT Feb 2013 #85

Like Kris Kristopherson wrote Protalker Feb 2013 #87

Well, let's see Trailrider1951 Feb 2013 #89

what a wonderfully FUN post. seabeyond Feb 2013 #91

I was in midlife so long ago, I can't remember. Blue_In_AK Feb 2013 #92

kick nt steve2470 Feb 2013 #95

I had mine at 32. Not kidding. Evoman Feb 2013 #96

i love you. seabeyond Feb 2013 #98

Aw, I love you to. Evoman Feb 2013 #100

I am going through mine now. I don't know how to get through it. smirkymonkey Feb 2013 #97

scary. seabeyond Feb 2013 #99

Thanks! I also have a ridiculous amount of student loan debt hanging over my smirkymonkey Feb 2013 #104

Denial and then a resolution to re-claim my life. no_hypocrisy Feb 2013 #101

"Getting old ain't for sissies." Bette Davis Tierra_y_Libertad Feb 2013 #102

1 over the double-nickle here,, benld74 Feb 2013 #103

I was 55 and it was April 10, 2007 at 7:34pm exactly SmileyRose Feb 2013 #108

It's not a wall, cher, it's a passageway. nolabear Feb 2013 #109

The truth etherealtruth Feb 2013 #110

I'm not a man, so maybe you can't relate OnionPatch Feb 2013 #111