Should Free Speech include Hate Speech?

[TalkingDog]

75. Actually quite the opposite. My mother had bouts of paranoid schizophrenia and BPD.

She was, at times, a very scary lady to live with.

You seemed to have missed my point. I don't think seeing a psychologist will "restore" anything.

I'll say it again, slowly and with smaller words so it's easier to understand. (if that snark hurts your feelings, deal with it):

Most adults learn how to cope with rude or unthinking people as they come to maturity. They learn that people have bad days and say things off the cuff. They learn that some people use humor to deflect hurt. Sometimes the humor is not always the good kind. They learn that other people grew up in houses where ribbing (from the gentle kind to the very rude and hurtful kind) was an everyday occurrence and the people who grew up that way expect others to be the same way or to have developed the necessary thick skin.

In other words, they learn that in the larger scheme of trying to live and survive that a few mis-spoken words generally don't mean a hell of a lot.

Instead they prefer to be generous (instead of overly sensitive, whining, and controlling) and give people the benefit of the doubt. Barring that, even if they don't feel generous, they learn that they can give people a fucking break on a fairly regular basis and their world and their person-hood remains intact.

If the barrage of rudeness or insensitivity becomes constant or if they are having a bad day and don't feel like being polite enough to ignore it, mature adults know that they can make others aware of the problem in a timely and appropriate manner. In many cases the offending person will apologize, because they had not realized their misstep. Even if this does not occur, the mature adult will know they have taken steps to maintain their sense of self worth and dignity.

And mature adults know that co-dependent behavior, like having another person step in and "defend" them robs them of their person-hood and does not allow them to develop their own coping skills. So the mature adult will avoid letting people "take up for them", preferring to fight their own battles.

If you haven't developed any or all of these coping skills, or if as a grown adult, you have not matured to the point where seeing this point of view is even possible, then you may need assessment by a trained professional (aka psychologist) because this more nuanced understanding of others and self is a fairly normal part of becoming an adult. A psychologist can assist in developing some cognitive strategies to deal with rude or insensitive people.

That's all I'm saying. And in case you haven't realized, this information in this post was not directed at the OP or the snarky person you berated.