General Discussion

davidn3600

(6,342 posts)

231. I agree 100%. And yet I get roasted for suggesting it around here.

Sat Mar 9, 2013, 07:16 PM

Mar 2013

Like I said above, if I ever have a kid, especially a daughter but a son too, I will make sure she learns how to defend herself and what to do when under duress.

What's the problem with that? I dont get why it's such a bad thing to teach people, especially women and kids, what to do when they are confronted with danger.

A lot of people on this thread are living in a fantasy land of idealism. The world is full of criminals and violent people. That isn't going to change by putting PSAs out to men saying "don't rape women." A rapist sees that ad on TV and they will start laughing. This world is a crazy place full of crazy people. That's just reality.

No. I am not saying it is the woman's responsibility to stop a rape. But taking steps of prevention and self-defense is the common sense and intelligent thing to do. It could save her life.

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Highlight:

Stop Telling Women How to Not Get Raped [View all] ProfessionalLeftist Mar 2013 OP

And, no means no, period. geek tragedy Mar 2013 #1

Unable to consent for any reason means NO too. n/t ProfessionalLeftist Mar 2013 #2

Yup. If it's not 100% obvious that she wants things to go forward, dude is doing something geek tragedy Mar 2013 #3

How About Be Careful? liberalmike27 Mar 2013 #79

" do your best not to get seperated from the herd" sufrommich Mar 2013 #87

Well said. redqueen Mar 2013 #90

Yes, but tomorrow is MsPithy Mar 2013 #242

Please cut the gentleman a little slack IrishAyes Mar 2013 #328

Because mercuryblues Mar 2013 #345

"Why did you go up to that room" redqueen Mar 2013 #348

exactly mercuryblues Mar 2013 #363

I didn't say IrishAyes Mar 2013 #353

Are women mercuryblues Mar 2013 #181

How about IrishAyes Mar 2013 #329

Male view One_Life_To_Give Mar 2013 #359

Yep! Someone here said they'd advise their daughter to not be alone with anyone till they know them bettyellen Mar 2013 #361

you do realize you are, in fact, blaming the woman, right? why weren't you more careful? niyad Mar 2013 #257

Victim-blaming by any other name... frankenfeinstein499 Mar 2013 #303

welcome to DU--unfortunately, seeing some of the posts in threads about rape on this board, niyad Mar 2013 #306

not so surprised, alas frankenfeinstein499 Mar 2013 #318

Because backlash. Rape culture, as abhorrent as most claim to find it, redqueen Mar 2013 #310

Hope you haven't misunderstood IrishAyes Mar 2013 #330

The point of the OP, to me, seems to be... redqueen Mar 2013 #337

Dead on. frankenfeinstein499 Mar 2013 #341

Thank you, anyone who thinks it's that hard to bettyellen Mar 2013 #347

I view it as anything but yes is a no SQUEE Mar 2013 #125

I agree with EVERYTHING in the OP; greiner3 Mar 2013 #4

How about if, as a society, we don't condone the aggression in the first place? eggplant Mar 2013 #214

The two are not mutually exclusive. 11 Bravo Mar 2013 #316

It's not that simple... davidn3600 Mar 2013 #5

It really is just that simple. Sheldon Cooper Mar 2013 #10

thank you niyad Mar 2013 #16

burglars and criminals are stupid datasuspect Mar 2013 #20

Well, your burglar analogy is piffle. MrModerate Mar 2013 #22

The burgler analogy is not piffle. It's actually very well stated. Maybe if you read it again ... Squinch Mar 2013 #28

Exactly ... 1StrongBlackMan Mar 2013 #36

+1 redqueen Mar 2013 #47

+2 JustAnotherGen Mar 2013 #354

I read it again. Very weak sauce. Care to tell me why it's not? n/t MrModerate Mar 2013 #52

No. Squinch Mar 2013 #63

Well, gee. I guess I rest my case then. n/t MrModerate Mar 2013 #83

That's nice, dear. Squinch Mar 2013 #85

The analogy is spot on ... 1StrongBlackMan Mar 2013 #40

It's an analogy . . . poke it too hard and it collapses. MrModerate Mar 2013 #51

lol Sheldon Cooper Mar 2013 #58

That is the nature of ANY analogy ... 1StrongBlackMan Mar 2013 #59

We can argue all day how hard burglars try to get in . . . MrModerate Mar 2013 #81

sweetie, if you honestly believe that "society as a whole" does not blame the woman, then I niyad Mar 2013 #107

I've been on the planet quite a little while . . . MrModerate Mar 2013 #123

and I have been on this planet a very long time, in a lot of different places, amoung many niyad Mar 2013 #135

Wallow away. I've done all I can. n/t MrModerate Mar 2013 #159

"wallow away"??? nice snide bit of nastiness there, because, after all, what we are discussing niyad Mar 2013 #221

I have nothing but contempt ... MrModerate Mar 2013 #235

your contempt is abundantly clear niyad Mar 2013 #237

+1 Sheldon Cooper Mar 2013 #243

wow wow wow. right niyad? another... wow. nt seabeyond Mar 2013 #244

I haven't been on this planet that long Lordquinton Mar 2013 #263

Do you like it when... IrishAyes Mar 2013 #333

welcome to DU. niyad Mar 2013 #334

LOL ... 1StrongBlackMan Mar 2013 #110

This is a red herring Warpy Mar 2013 #251

Agreed. And that's how I've raised my son . . . MrModerate Mar 2013 #261

There's your money quote: Doc Holliday Mar 2013 #304

The "and then run away . . ." MrModerate Mar 2013 #305

Thanks, StrongBlackMan Sheldon Cooper Mar 2013 #53

I just love the experts ... 1StrongBlackMan Mar 2013 #77

Would you advise people to go without locks then? caseymoz Mar 2013 #232

No ... 1StrongBlackMan Mar 2013 #322

What?? IrishAyes Mar 2013 #338

The statement was ... 1StrongBlackMan Mar 2013 #366

'Lawyerly Banter' or not IrishAyes Mar 2013 #367

Okay ... 1StrongBlackMan Mar 2013 #369

I heart 1strongblackman JustAnotherGen Mar 2013 #355

It's been my experience that burglars strictly pursue the low-hanging fruit. ZOB Mar 2013 #259

The thing is people have sex consensually all the time. Threedifferentones Mar 2013 #344

Actually, it's very typical kdmorris Mar 2013 #133

Thank you, Sheldon. RILib Mar 2013 #45

Well said. redqueen Mar 2013 #57

Yep. NO OTHER VICTIM gets grilled on how they woulda shoulda coulda Sheldon Cooper Mar 2013 #60

"No one denies that women should learn self-defense, and situational awareness, etc." redqueen Mar 2013 #67

But it is a sad commentary, that we do in almost boston bean Mar 2013 #86

The OP made *exactly* that argument. MrModerate Mar 2013 #126

If that's what the people around you believe, you need to move. MrModerate Mar 2013 #130

Have you ever sat in on a rape trial? uppityperson Mar 2013 #218

Trials are not "society at large" . . . MrModerate Mar 2013 #260

Your tiny sample of anecdotal evidence Lordquinton Mar 2013 #267

I've seen zero empirical evidence in this thread. Zero. MrModerate Mar 2013 #272

It's really tiresome to provide the same evidance over and over again Lordquinton Mar 2013 #286

Thanks. Useful (if harrowing) statistics. However . . . MrModerate Mar 2013 #293

Regardless of the cause, it is not the woman's fault Lordquinton Mar 2013 #295

Thanks for your thoughtful response, with which I still, I'm afraid, disagree . . . MrModerate Mar 2013 #300

"No one denies that women should learn self defense..." lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #279

There really is something else in play with the blame the victim ... 1StrongBlackMan Mar 2013 #323

I agree with this much: IrishAyes Mar 2013 #336

very well said. SemperEadem Mar 2013 #101

Thank you. nt uppityperson Mar 2013 #216

Nothing in life is simple IrishAyes Mar 2013 #332

is it your view then, that we should not bother teaching men that rape is wrong--that they niyad Mar 2013 #12

Wow. Bonobo Mar 2013 #19

having been witness to many, many posts and responses on this subject does make one wonder. niyad Mar 2013 #24

It is??? Holy shit! Why didn't someone tell us this before? lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #97

It isnt that "men" don't know rape is wrong SQUEE Mar 2013 #139

Thank you. redqueen Mar 2013 #152

Tell it to Niyad, that's exactly what she's saying. n/t lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #161

An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure davidn3600 Mar 2013 #191

It's up to the woman because there isn't a man around to protect them from rapists. duffyduff Mar 2013 #194

Teaching a woman how to protect themselves is treating them like property? davidn3600 Mar 2013 #226

THere is a whole lotta misinformation in that post. Squinch Mar 2013 #206

Ah, America. The land of Paranoia where we must lock our doors at night. NutmegYankee Mar 2013 #78

except for the property they've cased for months... SemperEadem Mar 2013 #115

It IS that simple. Women have just as much right to freedom of movement as men. duffyduff Mar 2013 #193

Thank you for that. prole_for_peace Mar 2013 #252

Exactly IrishAyes Mar 2013 #331

Can you give us an example michigandem58 Mar 2013 #6

k and r niyad Mar 2013 #7

From a males viewpoint, it seems to me to boil down to those magic three little words... BlueJazz Mar 2013 #8

None of the true things in your OP are invalidated by teaching women how to be safe. nt Bonobo Mar 2013 #9

teaching women how to be safe. seabeyond Mar 2013 #27

thank you SemperEadem Mar 2013 #42

Hey, but she shouldn't have been Texasgal Mar 2013 #142

It's REALLY about restricting the woman's right to move about. duffyduff Mar 2013 #195

correct. i can remembering living in reno in the 80's, single. 24 hour town. seabeyond Mar 2013 #201

Post removed Post removed Mar 2013 #29

What a load of sexist crap. nt pintobean Mar 2013 #89

+1 Dash87 Mar 2013 #114

The problem I have with this is, Dash87 Mar 2013 #109

I have a friend who was attacked from behind the other day. Bonobo Mar 2013 #236

the education would not be for the street punks but for posters on du that ask if it is rape.... seabeyond Mar 2013 #245

Of course it is rape to have sex with an unconscious woman. Bonobo Mar 2013 #250

The street punks in this analogy ARE the people who get a woman drunk seabeyond Mar 2013 #253

That's a completely false equivalency. Dash87 Mar 2013 #273

And how would you "teach women to be safe" bettyellen Mar 2013 #131

Someone posted an article along these lines a couple of months ago, Sheldon Cooper Mar 2013 #11

and it is likely the same thing will happen here. niyad Mar 2013 #13

It is the lack of realism. Bonobo Mar 2013 #17

Would you tell your daughter noamnety Mar 2013 #73

+1 Squinch Mar 2013 #204

*crickets* bettyellen Mar 2013 #268

*double crickets* (Bonobo doesn't know the majority of rapes are done by people riderinthestorm Mar 2013 #274

BTW, there were no crickets. Bonobo Mar 2013 #283

No I would not tell her never to do those things. Bonobo Mar 2013 #275

yeah it's pretty much random, unless you're talking some frat parties. bettyellen Mar 2013 #281

Let me lay it out the way I see it more clearly. Bonobo Mar 2013 #282

honestly Bo, the big objection is that there are no messages out there directed to men, and there bettyellen Mar 2013 #288

You're right. Bonobo Mar 2013 #290

some guys tend to stink up any threads asking them to be allies, because we're not phrasing it right bettyellen Mar 2013 #292

You forgot one Lordquinton Mar 2013 #289

The ones that would rape their daughters would not teach that, no. Bonobo Mar 2013 #291

Yeah, especially mine tavalon Mar 2013 #301

Although I (obviously) did click on this post ... etherealtruth Mar 2013 #21

that period was interesting because, we were attacked for saying all men are POTENTIAL rapists, in seabeyond Mar 2013 #30

I agree with your point Arcanetrance Mar 2013 #84

honestly arcane, i believe that would be the biggest benefit for ALL of us. seabeyond Mar 2013 #88

Sadly there's this stigma among alot men that if you don't go with the group your not one of the guy Arcanetrance Mar 2013 #93

yes. i think women are MUCH more likely to speak out to each other. we see it on du seabeyond Mar 2013 #103

Much like muslims are potential terrorists. n/t lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #102

that would be ALL people are potential terrorists, yes. if you really want to go that route, seabeyond Mar 2013 #112

No. It's important to single out Muslims because they represent most terrorists. lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #119

i would argue that muslims represent most terrorists. i guess that is how you define terrorism. seabeyond Mar 2013 #120

Actually that's a terrible analogy Arcanetrance Mar 2013 #174

> Squinch Mar 2013 #211

So tired of this. Jesus Christ! Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #14

Since they aren't rapists, it clearly wasn't a waste of time. n/t yodermon Mar 2013 #25

Clearly there are male children out there who do not get the message that rape is wrong. Squinch Mar 2013 #32

No! Is it your impression that all criminals are ignorant of the law? Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #48

Your annoyance is not really the issue here. Nor is your canard that this OP blames all men. Squinch Mar 2013 #62

Okay, let's shift away from paragraph (that you don't want to talk about)... Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #72

I'm not sure which paragraph you think I don't want to talk about. But Squinch Mar 2013 #82

I don't agree with the OP. At all. Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #98

Yet you think that a public education campaign on ESPN and in NFL games, aimed at men, Squinch Mar 2013 #105

You said some PSAs during football games might help..... bettyellen Mar 2013 #151

"So far, all prevention has aimed at changing the victim's behavior". cliffordu Mar 2013 #256

Kinda not. Squinch Mar 2013 #264

kinda, indeed tavalon Mar 2013 #302

some fathers do exactly as you with your sons SemperEadem Mar 2013 #37

You're asking me? Hells bells! You just made my point! Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #54

this isn't about you SemperEadem Mar 2013 #56

You are intentionally missing the point. Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #65

well, get used to hearing it SemperEadem Mar 2013 #68

Get used to it? No thanks. Here's advice for you... Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #74

In my observation, the people discussing on these threads are not really concerned about Squinch Mar 2013 #94

... Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #96

What insult? redqueen Mar 2013 #104

This is a discussion board. And I was not insulting you. I was disagreeing with your Squinch Mar 2013 #171

I think it is you missing the point. And I don't think it is intentional on your part. Squinch Mar 2013 #76

No, not every rapist "knows" its a crime. mostlyalurker Mar 2013 #224

I have been in half a dozen universities for freshman orientation. Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #225

True. The other part is to stop cultural acceptance mostlyalurker Mar 2013 #265

i think that is very much a fact. and calling him a monster leads one to "see" the monster. seabeyond Mar 2013 #269

If you believe ANY such transparent protestations of ignorance IrishAyes Mar 2013 #339

This is so spot on. Speaking as a father of two daughters... I can't do anything to control what Ed Suspicious Mar 2013 #69

+1 Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #75

But do you think that somebody's miscreant son can be better educated on how to treat your daughter Squinch Mar 2013 #100

The virulent, hyperbolic overreaction to this very simple, reasonable message.... redqueen Mar 2013 #108

I think what it says is very complex. Paradoxically, I think the subject is very painful Squinch Mar 2013 #132

If I had a son, there would be no uncertainty. No means no, and further, the absence of an emphatic Ed Suspicious Mar 2013 #116

The way I'm reading the OP Squinch Mar 2013 #134

The OP doesn't suggest instructing the sons as well. EOTE Mar 2013 #313

Perhaps because instructing daughters and not sons has not worked. Squinch Mar 2013 #315

Instructing sons and not daughters is equally stupid. EOTE Mar 2013 #320

As I said, I think we all know that no one is going to stop teaching their daughters about safety. Squinch Mar 2013 #327

Well, that's not what the OP calls for. EOTE Mar 2013 #342

The OP is a reaction to seeing these messages directed only at women bettyellen Mar 2013 #317

Again, it says doing one in lieu of the other. EOTE Mar 2013 #319

What it means is we're fed up with the only message on this be directed at women. bettyellen Mar 2013 #321

Silly me for thinking words mean things. EOTE Mar 2013 #343

No - deliberately obtuse to ignore every woman on this thread who clarifies the issue. bettyellen Mar 2013 #346

What explanations? There has been nothing but defenses, no explanations. EOTE Mar 2013 #352

Wow, double down on the ignorance. bettyellen Mar 2013 #356

So prominent and so patiently stated that you can't even provide one. EOTE Mar 2013 #358

Reality based when you deny their are half dozen people hear breaking it down for you? bettyellen Mar 2013 #360

So, your defense is "Other people have defended it for me!" EOTE Mar 2013 #362

Defense? Are you imaging this is an episode of bettyellen Mar 2013 #364

Another brilliant argument! EOTE Mar 2013 #365

this isn't blaming all men, any more than "don't drink and drive" campaigns are blaming all drivers fishwax Mar 2013 #156

for someone who is so tired of this, you have spent a lot of time and energy on this thread. niyad Mar 2013 #228

But then there's rape culture where men will not commit actual rape but will rationalize and parse. alp227 Mar 2013 #240

How the hell is focusing almost SOLELY on the victim "rape prevention education?" Number23 Mar 2013 #325

Let's be real. We need both sorts of campaigns. MrModerate Mar 2013 #15

so glad you have missed the toronto police officer telling women not to dress like sluts (the niyad Mar 2013 #23

The fact that the stupid remarks . . . MrModerate Mar 2013 #33

or the judge who said only a "shredded vagina" meant that a rape occurred... SemperEadem Mar 2013 #38

Teaching women how not to be raped gollygee Mar 2013 #18

I don't know who you hang out with . . . MrModerate Mar 2013 #26

Why do people try to dismiss women who talk about this gollygee Mar 2013 #31

Two foolish judges . . . MrModerate Mar 2013 #43

You really have your head in the sand RILib Mar 2013 #55

When you paint with too broad a brush . . . MrModerate Mar 2013 #71

Women are often blamed for being raped gollygee Mar 2013 #66

Well, I went to college in the 70s . . . MrModerate Mar 2013 #113

You won't like my response. gollygee Mar 2013 #127

You're right. I don't like your response -- for one reason. MrModerate Mar 2013 #157

Try thousands of foolish judges. bettyellen Mar 2013 #155

There's something like 32,000 judges of all sorts . . . MrModerate Mar 2013 #162

I'm contending that thousands or rape victims have been treated like shit bettyellen Mar 2013 #185

The number one thing that would assist in this would be to Lionessa Mar 2013 #34

the woman who wrote this has received numerous rape threats because of this article SemperEadem Mar 2013 #35

Not hard to believe. Even the internet sufrommich Mar 2013 #49

Sadly no, it isn't hard to believe at all. redqueen Mar 2013 #99

Three Words grilled onions Mar 2013 #39

You mean like teaching young girls about birth control means they'll be promiscuous? KittyWampus Mar 2013 #41

I think the commentary speaks mostly to the point boston bean Mar 2013 #106

+1000 smirkymonkey Mar 2013 #44

There isn't a parent in the world who can deny sufrommich Mar 2013 #46

Excellent, excellent post. redqueen Mar 2013 #111

it's as dismissive as telling a black person who sufrommich Mar 2013 #128

So why is it a bad idea skepticscott Mar 2013 #50

Stop telling people now not to get robbed treestar Mar 2013 #61

K&R Starry Messenger Mar 2013 #64

This is just more of that blame-the-rapist mentality. Iggo Mar 2013 #70

These threads are always so depressing. redqueen Mar 2013 #124

Do we also need to stop telling people how to, kestrel91316 Mar 2013 #80

When were women ever naive about bad sufrommich Mar 2013 #91

Why is rape 85% less common today than in 1980? lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #92

how about providing a link to those rather remarkable stats niyad Mar 2013 #118

. lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #121

you claimed bureau of justice, yet neither of those links is from doj. niyad Mar 2013 #146

Try this. Helen Reddy Mar 2013 #179

OMG a blog! Alas, I am undone. lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #280

Many people pushing these stats are doing so to legitimize porn. redqueen Mar 2013 #182

Every topic you habitually attack are reasons it is in decline. lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #285

No matter how many times statistics are explained to you, you just tighten your grip redqueen Mar 2013 #309

If the department of justice isn't a fair source, who is? lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #312

i know you purpose is to minimize and you do not care about reality, but here are a couple threads i seabeyond Mar 2013 #314

. lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #287

you are still promoting that number? and it is logical to you? wow. 1 in 3 military/college seabeyond Mar 2013 #129

I think it's odd how you can't accept stats from the bureau of justice statistics... lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #140

i think it is totally irresponsible when we ignore how and why the numbers are what they are for men seabeyond Mar 2013 #144

Facts are facts. They are neither responsible nor irresponsible. lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #149

when you conveniently ignore all FACTS that prove you fact wrong it is a mere game. offensive game seabeyond Mar 2013 #172

An ugly, sickening game. We can only hope that no one is buying that garbage. nt redqueen Mar 2013 #175

Facts have a well-known misogynistic bias? lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #227

I am amused by the non-sourcing of that number at your link. uppityperson Mar 2013 #230

RAINN should have enough credibility to serve as their own source. n/t lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #241

I guess you can't see what they refer to as #2 either. That is too bad as I'd like to see it. uppityperson Mar 2013 #246

Yes. I would prefer that their footnotes actually have footnotes. lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #278

you have ignored every bit of information that tells you that number is not correct. seabeyond Mar 2013 #247

You have presented none. lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #276

+1 Starry Messenger Mar 2013 #277

partly because violent crime in general is down 70% since 1993 fishwax Mar 2013 #183

Our society gets less and less dangerous each year... lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #238

It's not about pipi_k Mar 2013 #95

This stuff is getting lost in the weeds of ideology Prism Mar 2013 #117

Stepping out of the context of rape for a moment: Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #122

Actually, there are a wide variety of opinions about this- bettyellen Mar 2013 #138

What an odd response. Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #148

Your question assumes there is a "one size fits all" bettyellen Mar 2013 #154

Meh. Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #160

One has to wonder why you bother bettyellen Mar 2013 #184

Mind bending, isn't it? Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #186

Mind bending to ask why you introduce completely irrelevant questions? bettyellen Mar 2013 #188

I quoted the OP in bringing it up. Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #200

Did you miss the part where *what she wore* is entirely irrelevant? Seriously? bettyellen Mar 2013 #203

LOL! You are turning into a caricature. Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #210

I'm commenting on your bullshit attempt at derailing, in other parts of the thread as well.... bettyellen Mar 2013 #213

What bullshit. Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #217

No, I called your bluff from the get go. And you persist trying to derail. bettyellen Mar 2013 #219

Bluff? I asked a legit question with complete honesty about context. Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #220

Hey, Buzz and Betty both! IrishAyes Mar 2013 #340

Get A Room? HangOnKids Mar 2013 #357

This message was self-deleted by its author lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #153

really? BainsBane Mar 2013 #164

That's generally my opinion. Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #168

More than teaching men not to rape, I think we need to teach men not to tolerate other men who do Lydia Leftcoast Mar 2013 #136

^^^^^This^^^^^^^ Squinch Mar 2013 #143

Yes, the larger point is, conversations about rape need to be directed towards men ALSO. bettyellen Mar 2013 #223

"fight back" by holly near niyad Mar 2013 #137

As expected, this thread has lived up to my expectations etherealtruth Mar 2013 #141

yes, all the usual suspects, right on schedule niyad Mar 2013 #150

Is that not the definition of trolling? n/t lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #158

A couple posts up, you "self-deleted" a post. Buzz Clik Mar 2013 #163

My point wasn't entirely germane to your post. lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #170

Trolling? etherealtruth Mar 2013 #166

Yep. Starry Messenger Mar 2013 #165

One can only hope etherealtruth Mar 2013 #169

On the issue of alcohol... davidthegnome Mar 2013 #145

If the information about rape prevention geared toward women was honest bettyellen Mar 2013 #147

excellent point BainsBane Mar 2013 #167

The usual advice is useful only for the rarer occurrence of violent rape... bettyellen Mar 2013 #176

I understand BainsBane Mar 2013 #177

I don't know. davidthegnome Mar 2013 #173

I totally agree- I think we need to educate both sexes so the messages bettyellen Mar 2013 #180

girl, you need to post OP's more. you say the most brilliant things La Lioness Priyanka Mar 2013 #190

I never post OPs. But, wow- what a compliment- thank you. bettyellen Mar 2013 #192

Define "not working". lumberjack_jeff Mar 2013 #229

let's not make this about child custody. the fact that men perpetrate the vast bulk of violent crime bettyellen Mar 2013 #248

Sure thing, I'll let the "ad campaigns" know just1voice Mar 2013 #178

How do you teach a young man that he can't have "sexual intercourse with a 2-year-old" Petrushka Mar 2013 #187

where did you see anything about being PC in there? apparently it was not the family that bettyellen Mar 2013 #198

I think she means that with children, you seldom see the word "rape" gollygee Mar 2013 #202

Thank you, gollygee! Your interpretation of my post was 100% correct. (eom) Petrushka Mar 2013 #205

Oh, the PC thing threw me. I totally agree that the issue of child rape and abuse is soft-pedaled... bettyellen Mar 2013 #207

That's like asking how you tell a sick mind not to be sick anymore. talkingmime Mar 2013 #199

It's more like asking the media AND prosecutors why . . . Petrushka Mar 2013 #208

I'm at a loss for words. talkingmime Mar 2013 #212

Those ads need to be redirected toward men to tell them NOT to rape. talkingmime Mar 2013 #189

+1,000,000 n/t duffyduff Mar 2013 #197

I seriously wish I could rec this five million times. nt LaydeeBug Mar 2013 #196

Consent. Rex Mar 2013 #209

It's unfair, isn't it? LittleBlue Mar 2013 #215

I agree 100%. And yet I get roasted for suggesting it around here. davidn3600 Mar 2013 #231

The problem is you can be attacked anywhere, so self-defense is useless, but the emphasis duffyduff Mar 2013 #234

You see, that's twisting the logic davidn3600 Mar 2013 #239

sorry, it has EVERYTHING to do with patriarchal values--the ones that say that women are niyad Mar 2013 #254

The problem is....there are apologists for rape. Evoman Mar 2013 #297

.K & R! lastlib Mar 2013 #222

What's wrong with doing both? caseymoz Mar 2013 #233

Exactly, the only messages we are getting is of limited use. And since they are the only messages bettyellen Mar 2013 #249

To me, though caseymoz Mar 2013 #270

well yeah- and sadly enough more "helpful" advice would be don't ever go out on a one on one date... bettyellen Mar 2013 #271

Knowing rapists, robbers, and murderers exist... Deep13 Mar 2013 #255

Self-defense doesn't help the woman that's been knocked out or drugged justiceischeap Mar 2013 #258

I think I'll raise my own kids, thanks. FBaggins Mar 2013 #262

The only way for a woman to not get raped... bobclark86 Mar 2013 #266

The only way for a person to not get beaten up... Bonobo Mar 2013 #284

do we address the bully or do we tell the kid who is bullied how to protect themselves. seabeyond Mar 2013 #298

If my son is bullied, of course I address how he can avoid or defend himself. Bonobo Mar 2013 #299

as a society, do we address the victim or the bully. and you already know the answer. seabeyond Mar 2013 #308

If bullying was common and ignored in your child's school, would you ignore it? bettyellen Mar 2013 #350

numbers Deep13 Mar 2013 #335

I've spent my entire life being told how to avoid molestation/rape Hekate Mar 2013 #294

I remember reading somewhere that the "don't be that guy" ads were working. Evoman Mar 2013 #296

3 things in which i believe arely staircase Mar 2013 #307

Or how about this... politicandy Mar 2013 #311

Agreed IrishAyes Mar 2013 #324

+++ marions ghost Mar 2013 #368

Never understood this. Kurska Mar 2013 #326

But you see, the tips for women you've added - inappropriate violations bettyellen Mar 2013 #349

Blame the victim is the norm for only one crime - a female being raped. fifthoffive Mar 2013 #351

Message auto-removed Name removed Aug 2013 #370