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In reply to the discussion: "all men are potential rapists" [View all]BainsBane
(53,180 posts)but I gauge that not in terms of number of posts but HOW people respond. This thread for example, or posters who show a lack of compassion or even cruelty toward victims of assault. Men certainly are victims or rape and domestic violence and I have ZERO problem with your raising that very important point. What I have a problem with are threads like these that seek to create some sort of parallel on how a man might feel about a possible charge sometime, somewhere in the past that a rape victim might see all men as potential assailants because that really is what that post is about. Spider Jerusalem explained that concept as well as I've seen, so I'll simply link to it here: http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=2606903
Rather than seeking to understand what a rape victim might feel, the terror that might lead her to write something like that, some men paint themselves as the victim. Now I know I've called you on this in the past, and to your credit you thought about it, which is more than others here do. I agree with Spider J that they are being willfully obtuse and deliberately dismissive of the trauma of rape, as we by a few posters in this very thread. Then of course there is the fact that the most recent example they could find of such a statement was a year ago, when since then millions of women have been raped, a couple of hundred thousand in this country alone. Think about that: one comment in a year vs. hundreds of thousands of rapes. Is there really any kind of equivalency? Never in a million years would I diminish the suffering of men who have suffered rape or domestic battery. True, many more women face those crimes, but it is no less severe when perpetrated on a man. Basic safety is the most important issue to any human being. Someone who can't support a woman or man's right to that safety stands worlds apart from me. Someone who refuses to consider the pain and terror that rape victims go through and instead considers his own hurt feelings about hearing about rape more important, in my view, lacks the basic humanity to be an ally to anyone. We all say stupid things at times, but some show a consistent lack of compassion that I find chilling.
Slavery: You appear uninformed on the issue. I'm not talking about people who enter pornography and prostitution for lack of other options, though that certainly is an issue. I'm talking of women and boys who are slaves: forced, beaten, owned by others. There are currently more people living under slavery than at any point in human history and most are women. Slavery is enmeshed in the sex industry globally and in the US. Slaves also labor as domestics and even in industry. Hillary Clinton brought some attention to this as Secretary of State and you can find information on the websites of state, the UN, and many non-profit organizations working on the issue. CSPAN has video of an excellent conference at Yale's Gilder Lehrman Center for Slavery last year.
Gun control: Far more men die of gun violence than women, but of course more men are assailants too. I raise the issue because it is my number one political priority and because some who oppose gun control have claimed I should see them as my allies. Though I must confess the rape threads have tested my commitment. I'm determined to never again be a victim of any kind. How can I be sure that won't happen? I need to think about self defense, but a gun isn't the right solution, though frankly it crossed my mind today.
Workplace discrimination: The point about the Richards case is that joke was part of a larger pattern, which is why conference organizers took in seriously. as did the employer of one of the men involved. That pattern of a male dominated industry is such that there have been several reported rapes at their conferences. Both Rex and Recursion work in that field and have spoken about it. Both members are amazing allies for women. I disagree with them on some other issues but this key commitment to gender equality gives me utmost respect and admiration for them. The way so many responded to that incident tells me that do not support a non-discriminatory workplace and feel compelled to vilify that African America, lesbian woman, if not women more generally.
Then of course there is the ridiculous bullying tactic against HOF members. Anyone who does something so stupid declares themselves--both men and women are involved--enemies of feminism. in my mind. Disagree with points all they like, but this petty bullying shit they do is absurd. Few seem to be able to articulate a single point of disagreement, so I guess personal swipes are all they have. But I have no doubt the core issue is their resentment that I and some others won't shut up about women's rights. They are right. I won't shut up. Targeting feminists tells me they oppose the issues I care about, and in most cases they do, as this thread demonstrates.
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