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Victor_c3

(3,557 posts)

67. I've been pounding similar ideas into my two daughter's heads

Sun Apr 7, 2013, 05:03 AM

Apr 2013

My youngest is 2 years old and I don't think she has any concept of that yet, but my 4 year old does.

I stress over and over again to her how important school is. Whenever she tells me she wants to grow up to be an artist or a scientists or a truck driver I always have the same answer for her - "I'd be so proud of you!". So long as it was her choice and she was legitimately happy doing it, I'd be proud of her doing anything that she wants.

My newest thing is to stress to her never to be afraid of being wrong or making mistakes. You have try and make mistakes in order to learn things. My oldest daughter has a perfectionist streak in her which can be good and bad. It's heartbreaking to see her get so mad and frustrated because she can't draw a perfect circle or write a perfect looking lower case 'k' or whatever. However, she has a die-hard worth ethic and is always detail oriented. I hope that she can reach a happy balance in this aspect.

Like what you say, I also always stress how I will always love and support both of my daughters. I think it is a very important for them to know that they can pursue whatever life they want to pursue and to know that they'll always be loved and accepted.

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I haven't been able to shake the feeling I got when my daughter said "I think men are smarter than [View all] rainy Apr 2013 OP

niyad has posted tons of info on amazing women here: polly7 Apr 2013 #1

Before overreacting........it might actually be accurate. TimberValley Apr 2013 #2

My understanding is that there are more men at both extremes of the IQ spectrum. winter is coming Apr 2013 #3

Pure anecdote, but something I noticed years ago teaching large college classes petronius Apr 2013 #35

I remember discussing this when I was in college starroute Apr 2013 #40

"Hypergamy" is probably the term you're looking for. n/t alp227 Apr 2013 #65

It seems to me that in our Western culture, most women have always expected to "marry up" and raccoon Apr 2013 #72

I have never felt myself intellectually inferior to men BainsBane Apr 2013 #69

About IQ's I did google and found that women rainy Apr 2013 #4

"Men" or "women" don't have a collective IQ YoungDemCA Apr 2013 #8

I agree with you. It does colossal harm to do that to groups. it's diminishing. rainy Apr 2013 #17

Give me a fucking break BainsBane Apr 2013 #27

Are you serious????????????? Beacool Apr 2013 #54

This message was self-deleted by its author Squinch Apr 2013 #74

This from the same poster who told us we shouldn't depend on Squinch Apr 2013 #75

Welcome to DU ~ TimberValley In_The_Wind Apr 2013 #84

I have a 7 yr old granddaughter. southernyankeebelle Apr 2013 #5

I've been pounding similar ideas into my two daughter's heads Victor_c3 Apr 2013 #67

Excellent comments. You know I have a younger sister who was a perfectionist. She became southernyankeebelle Apr 2013 #87

What's ironic is that my son told me the exact opposite! mainer Apr 2013 #6

I think it was college. She was surrounded by very bright men. rainy Apr 2013 #10

If someone had said, "I think women are smarter than men," would you have been floored? TimberValley Apr 2013 #7

Nope ha ha ha. I have always thought and said that rainy Apr 2013 #11

A few good films that TCM shows from time-to-time regarding awesome women Tx4obama Apr 2013 #9

thanks! rainy Apr 2013 #12

She'll be a happier kid if she learns to not compare herself to others, but instead pursue her own bettyellen Apr 2013 #13

I think it's pretty normal to idealize the opposite sex a little ... dawg Apr 2013 #14

I don't think so and there is this; Dyedinthewoolliberal Apr 2013 #15

Sounds like there are multiple issues here. winter is coming Apr 2013 #16

Very wise words and you are so right. rainy Apr 2013 #21

Men may have more tendency to discuss abstract subjects starroute Apr 2013 #42

This message was self-deleted by its author nenagh Apr 2013 #58

Here is a good resource: demmiblue Apr 2013 #18

well, you could direct her to the women's rights and issues forum (under gender and orientation) niyad Apr 2013 #19

not all women love shoes. My daughter does. I don't. We're all individuals. liberal_at_heart Apr 2013 #20

Thanks, that's what I was looking for recommendations for reading:) rainy Apr 2013 #22

Harry Belafonte Disagrees. Warren DeMontague Apr 2013 #23

Ada Lovelace - founder of modern computing RainDog Apr 2013 #24

�milie du Ch�telet RainDog Apr 2013 #25

Barbara McClintock RainDog Apr 2013 #26

Here's something you can say to her that she will understand. pnwmom Apr 2013 #28

Elinor Ostrom RainDog Apr 2013 #29

The best advice I can give is to do your best to encourage individualism, period. Warren DeMontague Apr 2013 #30

Lynn Margulis RainDog Apr 2013 #31

A hero of mine. Bonobo Apr 2013 #41

Richard Dawkins thinks so too RainDog Apr 2013 #44

Thanks for sharing that, Raindog. Bonobo Apr 2013 #49

it seems like a lot of the most interesting work in the sciences lately RainDog Apr 2013 #51

Yeah, the examples of this interdependence among trees/plants is even more amazing. Bonobo Apr 2013 #53

I welcome my bacterial overlords... RainDog Apr 2013 #89

ask her why she thinks so. HiPointDem Apr 2013 #32

Did you try to find out where/how your Daughter came up with that ? JI7 Apr 2013 #33

She probably heard it from some little boy mercymechap Apr 2013 #61

Those shoes remind of Chinese foot-binding! treestar Apr 2013 #34

Kick for later...nt Mnemosyne Apr 2013 #36

Little while back my daughter told me boys are stinky girls are better.. snooper2 Apr 2013 #37

You should start by having her read... ljm2002 Apr 2013 #38

Mismeasure of Man has been widely criticized, however, alp227 Apr 2013 #66

Speaking of comedies, I don't remember seeing any women LuvNewcastle Apr 2013 #71

I'm reading all your posts and rainy Apr 2013 #39

Rosalind Franklin RainDog Apr 2013 #43

Virginia Woolf: Shakespeare's Sister RainDog Apr 2013 #47

Hmmm. You're not saying you equate nail polish with low intelligence? Honeycombe8 Apr 2013 #45

Preach. I paint my nails because it's fun and it relaxes me. I made Dean's list. Butterbean Apr 2013 #52

You do know that my post was saying what your post says, right? Honeycombe8 Apr 2013 #57

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees. I was agreeing with you and giving my own Butterbean Apr 2013 #77

Thank you. mercymechap Apr 2013 #62

Look up Max Dashu. She writes about the forgotten histories of women. nolabear Apr 2013 #46

I hear you Skittles Apr 2013 #48

This message was self-deleted by its author nenagh Apr 2013 #50

Please just slow down, set aside a couple of hours and start that time by asking your bluestate10 Apr 2013 #55

I feel sad for your daughter. Beacool Apr 2013 #56

This message was self-deleted by its author nenagh Apr 2013 #59

To be honest, savebigbird Apr 2013 #60

You will not find the answer here LittleBlue Apr 2013 #63

I read this book "Delusions of Gender" a couple years back. alp227 Apr 2013 #64

^^^ I also strongly recommend this book ^^^ MadrasT Apr 2013 #76

I'm a chemist and my boss is a women (she is a chemist too) Victor_c3 Apr 2013 #68

Luckily, I had a father in the picture when I tried to pull that shit as a child. smirkymonkey Apr 2013 #70

I'd suggest teaching her about the difference between statistical and absolute claims. Donald Ian Rankin Apr 2013 #73

Sounds like its a commentary on her peers, not some grand statement on IQ and gender. dkf Apr 2013 #78

That is the most likely situation etherealtruth Apr 2013 #88

Men aren't smarter. Turbineguy Apr 2013 #79

But I find that those differences overlap to a large degree. dawg Apr 2013 #82

I don't have a clue why your daughter would think this way ... etherealtruth Apr 2013 #80

She didn't comment on shoes make-up and nails. rainy Apr 2013 #83

I understood that those were your musings etherealtruth Apr 2013 #85

No. Both sexes have their distinct differences... Comrade_McKenzie Apr 2013 #81

She's an outlier. Most girls AND boys believe the opposite is true. lumberjack_jeff Apr 2013 #86