General Discussion

nolabear

(43,850 posts)

9. You could be describing my mother's father, including being a cop. It scarred her badly.

Sun Apr 28, 2013, 11:03 AM

Apr 2013

In fact the legacy lives on. When I was a little girl we were badly frightened by an episode on a visit, and I refused to ever see them again. He died not too many years after so I managed to keep that vow.

It's true a bad man is a bad man, and might use fists or knives or whatever on the truly helpless around him, but it's also true that guns extend the reach of a coward, so they can comfortably belive they can get to you but you can't get to them. It makes acting out a lot easier. And in my opinion, whether everyone has the right under law to own a gun, there are people who should not ever, ever have access to them. It's a problem with no solution under American law, and I have no suggestions except that we should provide access to help for girls like the one you were and no stigma about reporting it and trying to help everyone involved.

I'm terribly sorry for what you went through. I'm glad you have people. My mother's family didn't, and the depth of the repercussions was awful.

Peace to you, Robyn

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What it was like growing up with a "gun nut" as a father [View all] Robyn66 Apr 2013 OP

I'm very sorry that was your experience growing up. MineralMan Apr 2013 #1

I'm sorry to hear that your father terrified you like that. aikoaiko Apr 2013 #2

Thanks for sharing your painful experiences, Robyn. femmocrat Apr 2013 #3

Having a bad father is the worst, Robyn. I had two, one a gun nut and pervert, the other just Mnemosyne Apr 2013 #4

I am sorry your father treated you so badly. Jenoch Apr 2013 #5

Please pay attention. gussmith Apr 2013 #22

Did you read the headline she wrote Jenoch Apr 2013 #28

Did you read more than the headline? n/t cui bono Apr 2013 #33

Yes. Jenoch Apr 2013 #34

This message was self-deleted by its author OwnedByCats Apr 2013 #58

Similar experience growing up Freddie Apr 2013 #6

Fun isnt it? Robyn66 Apr 2013 #19

That is part of the whole power thing PatSeg Apr 2013 #23

I feel your pain; I grew up in the 50s and 60s and you sure didn't talk about that raccoon Apr 2013 #32

+1 freshwest Apr 2013 #36

Too many people just weren't willing to come to terms with that back then. AverageJoe90 Apr 2013 #47

Society was in a lot of denial back then about abuse within the family. The women's movement raccoon Apr 2013 #60

I have an ex that was like that OwnedByCats Apr 2013 #61

Booze + guns = bad situation. Lizzie Poppet Apr 2013 #7

The abuse you suffered was unconscionable. appal_jack Apr 2013 #8

The people I think are gun nuts, Robyn66 Apr 2013 #12

Sounds like neither of us thinks the other is a nut. appal_jack Apr 2013 #35

thanks! Robyn66 Apr 2013 #41

YOU KNOW IT, ROBYN Skittles Apr 2013 #52

You could be describing my mother's father, including being a cop. It scarred her badly. nolabear Apr 2013 #9

There was no safety for someone like me Robyn66 Apr 2013 #18

That's the lack of help and the stigma I was addressing. nolabear Apr 2013 #38

Thank you Robyn66 Apr 2013 #42

Thanks for the post. timdog44 Apr 2013 #10

Thank you! Robyn66 Apr 2013 #83

Sad... His defining characteristic is not gun owner... Pelican Apr 2013 #11

Thank you for sharing. liberalmuse Apr 2013 #13

k&r... spanone Apr 2013 #14

Thank you for telling your story. I am so sorry you had a father like that. Maraya1969 Apr 2013 #15

+1 freshwest Apr 2013 #37

What a horrible way to grow up. zeemike Apr 2013 #16

And I am not anti-gun at all Robyn66 Apr 2013 #21

VERY well said... "they are tools not objects that grant power". PeaceNikki Apr 2013 #40

I wrote a message OwnedByCats Apr 2013 #62

I heaven05 Apr 2013 #17

Wow. Faygo Kid Apr 2013 #20

I feel you. No guns in my house, growing up, but the sickness was there---so many similarities-- BlancheSplanchnik Apr 2013 #24

I will explain :) Robyn66 Apr 2013 #43

Well no matter who or what brought him OwnedByCats Apr 2013 #63

God's Plan?! Oakenshield Apr 2013 #65

Get a grip OwnedByCats Apr 2013 #75

well said . . . DrDan Apr 2013 #76

Thank you OwnedByCats Apr 2013 #80

I guess most times I assume gun crazy parents raise gun crazy children AndyA Apr 2013 #25

Good question about my brothers Robyn66 Apr 2013 #30

K&R 99Forever Apr 2013 #26

Background checks arent enough, we need drug and alchohol testing and license renewals.... CarrieLynne Apr 2013 #27

We need to imprison and/or treat dangerous maniacs. Taitertots Apr 2013 #29

it never occurred to me that what he was doing was breaking the law, since we were at home... CarrieLynne Apr 2013 #44

First step in gun ownership recovery is admit to being Emotionally Unstable. itsrobert Apr 2013 #31

Thanks for sharing, your defination is the same as mine. When someone becomes a different Thinkingabout Apr 2013 #39

The problem with your father isn't guns rl6214 Apr 2013 #45

Your father was not a responsible gun owner; he was a bad person that owned guns. badtoworse Apr 2013 #46

I doubt you would say "the way he chose to do it is of secondary importance" Pale Blue Dot Apr 2013 #50

You're right. A razor at her throat would have been much better. badtoworse Apr 2013 #56

I had a bit of a dysfunctional family growing up..... AverageJoe90 Apr 2013 #48

What a monster! olivelove Apr 2013 #49

Welcome to DU my friend! hrmjustin Apr 2013 #71

Welcome to DU!! Robyn66 Apr 2013 #73

This message was self-deleted by its author rightsideout Apr 2013 #51

How much of this is really about guns? flvegan Apr 2013 #53

Guns are a symptom of a larger problem in the OP dogknob Apr 2013 #54

Boy that is pretty close to my father! Robyn66 Apr 2013 #57

Having a gun pointed in your face is not about guns? treestar Apr 2013 #67

I guess the gun jumped up and pointed itself at her? TampaAnimusVortex Apr 2013 #68

But the father used guns, which are specifically scary treestar Apr 2013 #69

So are pipi_k Apr 2013 #72

The guy had guns around the house treestar Apr 2013 #74

So would that apply to swords and maces? TampaAnimusVortex Apr 2013 #82

Maybe, but those things all require some effort, too treestar Apr 2013 #84

Why are people not getting what I am saying Robyn66 May 2013 #85

It is crazy treestar May 2013 #86

The only answer for many gun nuts... nikto Apr 2013 #55

Thank you for sharing this lunatica Apr 2013 #59

He would have been as bad without the guns. My father wasn't to the degree yours was.... marble falls Apr 2013 #64

Except for the gun pipi_k Apr 2013 #66

Thanks Ms. Robyn FairWinds Apr 2013 #70

You hit that one on the head Robyn66 Apr 2013 #79

What a horrible experience liberal N proud Apr 2013 #77

I would hate to tell you my memories Robyn66 Apr 2013 #78

How horrible! I am so sorry for your experience. smirkymonkey Apr 2013 #81

Seems like every day Robyn66 May 2013 #87