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riderinthestorm

(23,272 posts)

55. I honestly didn't mean to thread derail, I just wanted the OP to understand he prob does not have

Mon Feb 6, 2012, 11:02 PM

Feb 2012

all of the facts, nor is he privy to the family's private situation, that teens lie, that there are two sides to every story, and add in a vengeful ex-spouse situation and there's no way an outsider has enough information to judge.

(we don't have enough info from the OP to judge)

That said, I simply have to respond to your question. By an APG, do you mean an outpatient support group of other teens? She's going twice/week to that (and weekly to a private counselor). She's been sober since December 11th so we're really in the fragile stage. I'm shocked and saddened that our kids are the same age - I really have a hug for you since you "know"... my older girl appears to have escaped the addictive gene (my dad and my husband's dad were both raging alcoholics) and channeled her prodigious intellect into being academically precocious. Not so my beautiful sweet youngster.

I'm so grateful to find others on DU! Honestly, one feels pretty alone in RL....

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What say you...my boss' ex-wife just threw their daughter out of the car and drove off... [View all] joeybee12 Feb 2012 OP

heck, my dad used to do that to me. provis99 Feb 2012 #1

In Vegas? joeybee12 Feb 2012 #5

Vegas would have been a lot better. provis99 Feb 2012 #17

Was this close to home? joeybee12 Feb 2012 #19

I have to admit, it was never more than 10 miles from home. provis99 Feb 2012 #23

This happened to me a few times too. Lunacee2012 Feb 2012 #48

Insufficient information to form an opinion. WillowTree Feb 2012 #2

What are you talking about... This is DU MattBaggins Feb 2012 #40

Just wait right? Broderick Feb 2012 #47

I agree. We need more information. juajen Feb 2012 #109

It can be abuse, but isn't necessarily, IMO. Brickbat Feb 2012 #3

there was an incident almost exactly like this a year or so ago--made the news--mom arrested librechik Feb 2012 #4

The charges were, rightly, dropped obamanut2012 Feb 2012 #118

thx for the update-- librechik Feb 2012 #121

I hope she stopped the car first DJ13 Feb 2012 #6

That was my thought as well slackmaster Feb 2012 #57

Yes, that's definitely abuse. TheWraith Feb 2012 #7

Really? blueamy66 Feb 2012 #64

Kid could get picked up by a predator Shankapotomus Feb 2012 #79

Or kid could learn a valuable lesson. blueamy66 Feb 2012 #86

Not at all Shankapotomus Feb 2012 #103

My son has a 10 month old daughter whom he loves desperately. stufl Feb 2012 #8

when it is my turn (my daughter is 5) Maine-ah Feb 2012 #56

When you say 'threw their daughter out of the car' you mean the mother stopped first, right? tawadi Feb 2012 #9

Figuratively threw...stopped the car I assumed... joeybee12 Feb 2012 #14

That could have ended badly tawadi Feb 2012 #21

I don't think you want to leave a 14-year-old girl alone joeybee12 Feb 2012 #24

Yeah, maybe. But in the middle of the day, if just a few blocks from home..maybe tawadi Feb 2012 #31

NYC kids walk around the city and or take public transportation all the time at 14! Geeze. bettyellen Feb 2012 #76

Dr. Phil ( I know, I know) obamanut2012 Feb 2012 #99

Please don't buy into that hysteria. Codeine Feb 2012 #84

Me too Dorian Gray Feb 2012 #89

I'd need to know a little more before I called it child abuse. Arkansas Granny Feb 2012 #119

Depends where treestar Feb 2012 #10

Las Vegas, and no... joeybee12 Feb 2012 #11

Where did the mom kick her out of the car? enlightenment Feb 2012 #22

+1 nt riderinthestorm Feb 2012 #30

Were there sidewalks, a library, a store, an Applebee's? obamanut2012 Feb 2012 #101

The last sentence treestar Feb 2012 #115

Exactly, one-sided and filtered through two sources obamanut2012 Feb 2012 #117

Second hand gossip. Quantess Feb 2012 #12

I would have been too afraid liberal N proud Feb 2012 #13

Maybe she saw it on TV last night Tsiyu Feb 2012 #15

I saw that, too...Modern Family... joeybee12 Feb 2012 #20

Ah..that age does make a difference Tsiyu Feb 2012 #36

Makes you wonder why she is his X wife? OffWithTheirHeads Feb 2012 #16

Oh, the stories.... joeybee12 Feb 2012 #18

it's abandonment and possibly child endangerment. notadmblnd Feb 2012 #25

Depends MoonRiver Feb 2012 #26

Did she 'throw her out of the car' while it was still moving Rex Feb 2012 #27

If not abuse, it's dangerous to the kid. n/t Cleita Feb 2012 #28

I have a 15 year old daughter and we are going through a very, very difficult year riderinthestorm Feb 2012 #29

All the best to you and your daughter tawadi Feb 2012 #34

There are no right answers and parenting does not come with a manual. riderinthestorm Feb 2012 #35

Please do whatever it takes to stop her from going down this path nobodyspecial Feb 2012 #41

Oh my god, can I pm you? I would really love to talk if you are willing riderinthestorm Feb 2012 #44

Find an APG fast elehhhhna Feb 2012 #54

I honestly didn't mean to thread derail, I just wanted the OP to understand he prob does not have riderinthestorm Feb 2012 #55

This message was self-deleted by its author seaglass Feb 2012 #95

what a post. that is interesting seabeyond Feb 2012 #73

Not a flame, but frankly I'm not going to say you did the right thing. TheWraith Feb 2012 #42

Read post #44 and get back to me. She was dealing drugs, prostituting herself. Its way beyond pot riderinthestorm Feb 2012 #45

my son is a cross country runner. he runs 11, 12 or more miles ALL over town. since 14. seabeyond Feb 2012 #72

I know -- very weird replies to this to me, too obamanut2012 Feb 2012 #107

any other thread about child, posters all over overprotecting "little darlins" seabeyond Feb 2012 #113

Peace to you and your family mrs_p Feb 2012 #50

Thks. I didn't mean to thread derail but the OP really prob does not have all the info to judge this riderinthestorm Feb 2012 #58

Your story is a good reminder that it is easy mrs_p Feb 2012 #74

anywhere in our town, i would be comfortable pulling over and telling either sons, 14 and 16, to get seabeyond Feb 2012 #52

Thanks seabeyond. She had an hour walk home and was fine. Yeah, it does suck tho...nt riderinthestorm Feb 2012 #59

Great example of maturity there. tabasco Feb 2012 #61

Do you have any statistics on this? blueamy66 Feb 2012 #65

That's fine. Nobody has walked in my shoes, I was simply pointing out to the OP, they may not have riderinthestorm Feb 2012 #70

a 15 yr old? really? in a year she will have her own car. at what point is she off moms hip. seabeyond Feb 2012 #71

I posted about the FIRST time we had a "car argument" and my 14 yr old daughter drove off on me! riderinthestorm Feb 2012 #75

there, but for the grace of god go ..... all parents. seabeyond Feb 2012 #81

No it wasn't obamanut2012 Feb 2012 #108

I think you did the right thing at the time. HappyMe Feb 2012 #80

In that case you were just weighing Shankapotomus Feb 2012 #82

at 14 my son started running cross country. running 11, 12, or more miles all over town. 15 is a seabeyond Feb 2012 #87

The difference here is Shankapotomus Feb 2012 #104

oh, bull. you were talking danger. no more so than other kids. kid KNOWING you are angry. good. seabeyond Feb 2012 #106

I'm still talking danger Shankapotomus Feb 2012 #123

wow. lol. all kids and teen stay in parents view at all times cause they ALL display all this shit seabeyond Feb 2012 #124

seabeyond Shankapotomus Feb 2012 #125

It wasn't "by the side of the road" obamanut2012 Feb 2012 #111

But it is a behavior that employs Shankapotomus Feb 2012 #126

You have my sympathies. Codeine Feb 2012 #85

Oh Gosh Dorian Gray Feb 2012 #91

I want to give you a big hug. unapatriciated Feb 2012 #94

This message was self-deleted by its author unapatriciated Feb 2012 #97

No flames from me obamanut2012 Feb 2012 #105

Well, teenagers can be horrible, I'm sure mrs_p Feb 2012 #32

my mom did that irisblue Feb 2012 #33

Probably not if she is 14 Nikia Feb 2012 #37

My mother never ever through me out of a car. Or out of the house. Jennicut Feb 2012 #38

Bad parenting, yes nobodyspecial Feb 2012 #39

Not enough information to form a judgement Marrah_G Feb 2012 #43

Same here. I wouldn't take what a teen said in an emotional state as gospel... Honeycombe8 Feb 2012 #53

Sometimes teens need a lesson. Codeine Feb 2012 #46

The weather was lovely today Nevernose Feb 2012 #49

A better lesson would be to act like a fucking adult tabasco Feb 2012 #63

and what would that "example" be? blueamy66 Feb 2012 #66

I'd always find a safe place to stop... hunter Feb 2012 #51

I did that the 1st time. I got out + forgot the keys in my agitation. She changed seats + drove off riderinthestorm Feb 2012 #69

oh my god. How'd she turn out? mainer Feb 2012 #93

This just happened last year. She's just 15 now. Your question was so poignant for me though riderinthestorm Feb 2012 #114

My sincere wishes that all turns out OK mainer Feb 2012 #116

Not abuse at all. blueamy66 Feb 2012 #60

At 14, anything less than 4 or 5 miles and I'd rather walk than be driven bhikkhu Feb 2012 #62

+1. We walked everywhere as kids. Not much chance of being thrown out SammyWinstonJack Feb 2012 #98

My mom threw me out of the house at 16... being thrown out of a car and being told to walk home is Luciferous Feb 2012 #67

define "threw" Motown_Johnny Feb 2012 #68

If the girl got run over while walking home I suspect the ex-wife would end up in some trouble.. Fumesucker Feb 2012 #77

Really, there isn't enough info here to say. HappyMe Feb 2012 #78

I don't like it. Are_grits_groceries Feb 2012 #83

It depends Dorian Gray Feb 2012 #88

she could be a lousy parent. i dont know. i have no problem PULLING OVER and letting a kid seabeyond Feb 2012 #90

Ah, I remember those days... mainer Feb 2012 #92

That's how we got each of my nieces. Iggo Feb 2012 #96

I'm replying to the OP rather than individual posts, because there are a couple of themes Ms. Toad Feb 2012 #100

depends on what you mean by 'threw their daughter out of the car'... WI_DEM Feb 2012 #102

The OP says upthread she wasn't "thrown" out of teh car obamanut2012 Feb 2012 #112

Not nearly enough information. Mira Feb 2012 #110

i'd have to know a lot more. barbtries Feb 2012 #120

Mine were much younger when I put them out of the car. I stayed close without them knowing. appleannie1 Feb 2012 #122