Child free women: Don't you just love being told "Happy Mother's Day," by people who don't know you

[pipi_k]

139. "Speak gently..."

That is good advice no matter what, because what you said is true...you never know what heartbreak someone is experiencing, or has experienced.

My youngest stepdaughter had two miscarriages in less than a year. For a short time during her pregnancies, she was a "mother" to a fetus. Would she be hurt if someone wished her a Happy Mothers Day, or would she appreciate someone acknowledging that those fetuses even existed....one never knows how someone will feel about what we say.

After my own daughter passed away in 1975, my mother avoided mentioning her name. Nobody did. Never talked about her...I suppose people were afraid that doing so would make me sad. It would have, but that wouldn't have been a bad thing, necessarily. It's good to cry. It's good to mourn. If we don't do that, we find ourselves doing it years and years later.

I suppose I could have said to people, please...talk about Pammy. She was a real person. She lived. It will hurt me, but not as much as seeing people act like she had never existed.