What do you think of the word "unladylike"?

[MADem]

266. If they're invited to a formal event, they do want this information and they want to follow it.

They don't want to be regarded as "stupid rubes" or uncouth people. It isn't a question of being "fine people," it's all about being able to move through social situations and not embarrass oneself by behaving inappropriately. George Bush was born very rich, but he was also an uncouth rube who didn't know how to behave. Barack Obama grew up in a rented apartment in Honolulu, but he knows how to conduct himself at a formal dinner.

People who don't know the basic rules of etiquette sweat the load and are ill at ease--and it shows. Some make an effort to take a crash course or copy others at the table so they don't humiliate themselves. But there's no need to NOT know--it doesn't cost a cent to learn what's appropriate, especially now, with computers. No need to attend an etiquette course, or have a mother or grannie teaching you where the fork goes, how to place the napkin, etc.

It's really not a point of pride to be unable to conduct oneself properly in polite society. It's not "archaic" to know how to behave in formal social settings. It's the mark of someone who wants to be able to interact at all levels, from casual to formal.

Of course, people do tend to set their sights according to what they believe they can achieve in life. If you don't think you will ever have any need for this information, you probably never will have any need for it. You'll never find yourself in a circumstance where you have to worry about mistaking the finger bowl for lemon soup.