General Discussion

laundry_queen

(8,646 posts)

100. Boy, don't I know that message

Mon May 27, 2013, 08:56 PM

May 2013

My parents were the same way. Fat people were lower than dirt - mental defectives, lazy slobs with no self worth and no self control - completely unworthy of any kind of love. My mom used to always say, "aren't you GLAD you have a skinny mom? Wouldn't it be horrible to have a FAT mom like *insert name of my friend here*" I remember feeling sorry for my friends who had fat moms, after all, THOSE moms weren't loved as much as MY mom was. Besides, all their husbands couldn't wait to leave them, right?

Yep, fat people were scum in my parents' house.

Now that I'm obese, they DO treat me like 'less than'. It's soul destroying when it's your own parents. My parents don't even have any pictures of 'fat' me, just my skinny teen pictures all over the house. Like I ceased to exist when I gained weight. I'm doubly blessed in that I have a physical condition that makes it more difficult for me to lose weight AND I have this stupid emotional crap with regards to my parents.

Anyway, yeah, it's a complex issue. Fat shaming whether it's from DU or from your own parents does shit all to solve it.

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Highlight:

Is obesity ever a person's fault [View all] nobodyspecial May 2013 OP

yes and no FreeState May 2013 #1

Message auto-removed Name removed May 2013 #136

I'm pretty sure it's my fault that I'm fat. NaturalHigh May 2013 #2

Mine is. I know that I'd be old and cranky so I eat to much to be fat. The jolly brewens May 2013 #16

Same here! But I've just turned over a "very low sodium" leaf ( I LOVE salt!), so it's a start. WinkyDink May 2013 #72

Of course it is. Most extreme cases are an example of that. Warpy May 2013 #3

You have made a very good observation. I have been fat all my life. I never liked being southernyankeebelle May 2013 #56

Not always. n/t LeftofObama May 2013 #4

as much as alcoholism is an alcoholic's fault... n/t eShirl May 2013 #5

So everyone who is fat nobodyspecial May 2013 #9

Do you feel better now? Marrah_G May 2013 #22

nobody ever sets out to become an alcoholic or a fat person arely staircase May 2013 #25

The real answer from a food addict..... Red State Rebel May 2013 #149

You make a really good point about having to eat and how hard that is. Chemisse May 2013 #155

not only do you have to eat, but you have eat carbohydrates to survive. liberal_at_heart May 2013 #159

So... all of it? Pelican May 2013 #122

A ten year old child is not to blame. NYC_SKP May 2013 #6

Certainly not with children. DNA and what they are taught. Our pediatrician told me ... nessa May 2013 #81

and if it's not an obese child's fault, does it become their fault on their 18th birthday. (nt) nessa May 2013 #82

Good question blueamy66 May 2013 #134

in my case it was arely staircase May 2013 #7

Thank you for your honesty nobodyspecial May 2013 #11

Is this Tien1985 May 2013 #8

I don't see it as a stupid argument nobodyspecial May 2013 #10

You appear determined to change that BainsBane May 2013 #12

Was there a memo? siligut May 2013 #59

You're right of course Tien1985 May 2013 #65

Spring is in the air siligut May 2013 #79

I'm probably 15 lbs overweight for my frame. lpbk2713 May 2013 #13

Good grief -- you are scarcely very overweight -- Hekate May 2013 #71

How intellectually incapacitated must one be before it's considered a disability? REP May 2013 #14

Wow nobodyspecial May 2013 #15

Well, posting flamebait shit is your CHOICE Marrah_G May 2013 #24

Like mama always said MattBaggins May 2013 #68

Just went through timdog44 May 2013 #17

Yes. The first year of my marriage I stopped my eating disorder. Butterbean May 2013 #18

I am glad you have overcome your eating disorder. nobodyspecial May 2013 #19

Thank you, but I haven't. The weight gain made me freak out Butterbean May 2013 #23

This sounds like a major problem- digonswine May 2013 #51

I have been on the med merry go 'round since college. Butterbean May 2013 #144

Boy, don't I know that message laundry_queen May 2013 #100

Laundry Queen... JNelson6563 May 2013 #133

Huge hugs to you. I can relate. Butterbean May 2013 #142

N.E.D.A. can help October May 2013 #129

Thanks. It's been so long that I sort of have accepted it as just part of who I am. Butterbean May 2013 #143

Not necessarily......... Capt.Rocky300 May 2013 #20

Message auto-removed Name removed May 2013 #138

Posts like this are flamebait Marrah_G May 2013 #21

Perhaps not everyone shares your opinion nobodyspecial May 2013 #32

Must make you feel wonderfully superior! Marrah_G May 2013 #35

No, it doesn't nobodyspecial May 2013 #38

who says being obese is a bad thing? datasuspect May 2013 #26

If you are healthy and not experiencing any difficulties nobodyspecial May 2013 #33

Not always treestar May 2013 #27

bingo. MFM008 May 2013 #29

I found this an interesting read. Maybe it would help. nobodyspecial May 2013 #31

I Am Obese grilled onions May 2013 #28

I'm sorry for the medical conditions you face. nobodyspecial May 2013 #30

me to! MFM008 May 2013 #40

I wish we still had unrec. Morning Dew May 2013 #34

Sometimes Coyote_Bandit May 2013 #36

How much good does shaming and blaming do? love_katz May 2013 #37

I recently quit smoking fasttense May 2013 #127

LOLLOLLOL love_katz May 2013 #147

Oh ... Sigh... Where to start? tavernier May 2013 #39

I have the same issue with bad genes nobodyspecial May 2013 #45

You want a cookie now? MattBaggins May 2013 #70

Yeah, sure tavernier May 2013 #77

Have you eaten today? Cirque du So-What May 2013 #41

Why, yes, I have nobodyspecial May 2013 #48

I'm too busy Cirque du So-What May 2013 #50

My biggest objection to some of these over weight conversations Arcanetrance May 2013 #42

BMI is a mess nobodyspecial May 2013 #49

That is a toss up question. Lady Freedom Returns May 2013 #43

In my case, yes, and every time I gain weight it's directly Cleita May 2013 #44

Thank you for your honest response. nobodyspecial May 2013 #47

I agree with you. Plus I have to say am a stress eater, big time. southernyankeebelle May 2013 #58

addiction of any kind can take years or even decades to kick. liberal_at_heart May 2013 #75

The problem with obesity timdog44 May 2013 #46

It always is Uzair May 2013 #52

I'm fat and now... Bay Boy May 2013 #106

food can be an addiction just like DesertFlower May 2013 #53

As with all these flame bait questions and issues posted here on DU aristocles May 2013 #54

+1 This. Read this, OP! nt Pholus May 2013 #62

Excellent answer for this particular flame bait Hekate May 2013 #93

Ever? Of course. RedCappedBandit May 2013 #55

oh hell yea, most of the time quinnox May 2013 #57

It can be. ForgoTheConsequence May 2013 #60

Yes, if they're republicans. hughee99 May 2013 #61

Yes for about 95% of people. justanidea May 2013 #63

My, aren't we the self righteous one? madmom May 2013 #103

"Eating less and moving more." loyalsister May 2013 #145

partially. Prejudice and hate are also a person's fault. liberal_at_heart May 2013 #64

Point out to me exactly where I been prejudiced. nobodyspecial May 2013 #94

Your entire OP reeks of condescension and self-righteousness. LAGC May 2013 #161

I am my husband's Scapegoat HockeyMom May 2013 #66

I guess the question for YOU is.....is obesity ALWAYS a person's fault? Pholus May 2013 #67

No nobodyspecial May 2013 #89

Then the point of the OP was.... ? Pholus May 2013 #90

Flamebait, just like others are saying. Rex May 2013 #141

America is the land of the free. You are free to choose to consume any products you want to lunasun May 2013 #69

I'm sure most of the time it is. Apophis May 2013 #73

Yes. rrneck May 2013 #74

Yes blueamy66 May 2013 #76

It's difficult for poor people abelenkpe May 2013 #78

It's almost always the fault of the obese individual, imho. Marr May 2013 #80

I think it would be cool if researchers could determine the catalyst that changes addiction liberal_at_heart May 2013 #85

Another question loyalsister May 2013 #83

Great post. ITA. n/t TDale313 May 2013 #111

Who cares whose "fault" it is? Bettie May 2013 #84

Merely the need of some to feel superior to someone else. Pholus May 2013 #88

I feel the same way Bettie May 2013 #91

Please point out to me where I was nobodyspecial May 2013 #95

Who said it was you? Pholus May 2013 #96

You posted an invitation for people to do so Bettie May 2013 #104

exactly BainsBane May 2013 #107

It's not the first time for that one either. nt laundry_queen May 2013 #108

I'm responsible for what other people post? nobodyspecial May 2013 #109

Well then, perhaps you could explain the reason for your post? Bettie May 2013 #110

The motivation for the OP is the great unanswered question here. Pholus May 2013 #116

Of course Yo_Mama May 2013 #86

It's a free country. LisaL May 2013 #87

Well I have three things to blame for mine... cherokeeprogressive May 2013 #92

I was yelled at as a child for Manifestor_of_Light May 2013 #97

Possibly eating habbits developed, growing up, watching our parents eat. demosincebirth May 2013 #98

seeing some of the fat and pudgy kids, I have a feeling it does run in families quinnox May 2013 #99

Yes and no revolution breeze May 2013 #101

Of course. MrSlayer May 2013 #102

Go look at pictures of crowds sorefeet May 2013 #105

People moved around more back then, Quantess May 2013 #112

why? would that help you feel morally superior for not being obese? La Lioness Priyanka May 2013 #113

I'm fat because I eat fried/oily/sugary foods and don't move enough. tarheelsunc May 2013 #114

"Fault"? As in "Flaw" or something to feel bad about? That's an external appraisal only. nolabear May 2013 #115

I'm obese and it is both my fault and the side effect from the drugs I am on for ptsd. applegrove May 2013 #117

I'm kinda thin and I blame it on genetics LeftInTX May 2013 #118

I was thin until two years. Then put on 80 pounds. Then I lost it. Funny thing happened though... DJWBlue May 2013 #119

that's been my experience too. liberal_at_heart May 2013 #120

I agree. Getting older has also been a blessing for me as well. DJWBlue May 2013 #121

Yes. nt bike man May 2013 #123

Hardest thing i ever did in my life. Notafraidtoo May 2013 #124

You start this thread then YOU duck all responsibility. Classic. n/t KurtNYC May 2013 #125

One thing. is certain the mass advertising of many food products to an still_one May 2013 #126

Trash thread. Iggo May 2013 #128

Is it in your fault fault in your case? LanternWaste May 2013 #130

Mine is liberal N proud May 2013 #131

I've read through the whole thread with interest BanzaiBonnie May 2013 #132

Before I answer that question, i'm going to have a look Sivafae May 2013 #135

is clickbait/flamebait guaranteed to raise people's hackles? datasuspect May 2013 #137

Message auto-removed Name removed May 2013 #139

Nice shit stirring thread, I see it worked. Rex May 2013 #140

Can be, but what a dickheaded question. cliffordu May 2013 #146

Nearly, but not quite, always. Donald Ian Rankin May 2013 #148

I would say about 90% of the time HappyMe May 2013 #150

When I went off birth control pills, I lost 35 pounds in two months. CrispyQ May 2013 #151

your OP is a leading question noiretextatique May 2013 #152

I blame chocolate. For being delicious (nt) Nye Bevan May 2013 #153

It's The Sugar otohara May 2013 #158

this column is gaining comments MFM008 May 2013 #154

Thirty million people in the US have thyroid disease and may not know it. Manifestor_of_Light May 2013 #156

I dunno. Do monster doses of daily prednisone plus 3 other daily steroids for severe asthma count? riderinthestorm May 2013 #157

Sometimes no... cynatnite May 2013 #160