Let's make this clear: responding to your teenage child's words with violence is NOT OKAY.

[riderinthestorm]

40. You are lucky. Your story is identical to mine, same incredible older child, same loving joy,

same rural free-spirited farm life, thousands of nights of peace and grace....

...and then my 14 year old got hooked on drugs. Sorry to say but respect goes out the window and a whole new relationship hits the wall.

We do NOT know what the inner workings are in that family. We have no idea what the real time dynamics are there, and what preceded that action. I threw my daughter's bong out the window and smashed it. It belonged to her right? How dare I? Confiscated and burned her Bob Marley hat that she was using as a signal to deal drugs at school, perhaps I should have simply had a convo with her instead of dragging her ass to rehab? Must be the product of terrible parenting! If only I'd just spoken to her with respect all those years....

I'm just getting really aggravated by back seat drivers in family business. I get it - this guy invited us into his inner family life with this drama. My older girl is dumbfounded at the turn my younger girl has taken - respect and loving relationships pretty much defined our family.... until my youngest turned 14. Now nothing is off the table.

You are lucky. Perhaps you don't have addictive genes in your family. Or mental illness, or bi-polar, or learning disabilities or... (insert trouble here).

I just can't find it in my heart to judge this dad. I just can't. Even with as much information as we have, I still would say we don't have enough info to judge him.