Death row diary offers a rare glimpse into a morbid world [View all]

[mia]

My elderly father is mentally alert but has recently lost an interest in reading, even after getting him some stronger reading glasses. The words below could have been written by him - as he becomes more confined by an aging body.

Another inmate helped to clarify my Dad's recent behavior for me. I hope that the large print books that I bought Dad for Father's Day will lift his spirits.

I've already thrown or given away 95% of my personal property, the stuff that for years seemed so important. All those great books I'll never get to read; reams and reams of legal work I've been dragging around, and studying, for two decades and which has suddenly lost its relevance.

My magazines and newspapers stack up unread; I have little appetite to waste valuable, irreplaceable hours reading up on current events. Does it really matter to me now what's happening in the Middle East, or on Wall Street, or how my Miami Dolphins are looking for the upcoming new season? What's the point? Ditto the TV; I'm uninterested in wasting time watching programs that now mean nothing in the grand scheme of things.

The other day I caught myself reaching for my daily vitamin. Really?, I wondered, as the absurdity hit me. Likewise, after 40 years of working out religiously, that's out the window now. Again, what's the point? Now, every decision about how to spend the next hour reminds me of Elaine in that "Seinfeld" episode where she had to constantly evaluate whether her boyfriends were really "sponge worthy."

http://www.cnn.com/2013/06/14/us/florida-death-row-diary/index.html