General Discussion

Mira

(22,690 posts)

185. Your post makes very good sense to me and I'm glad you wrote it.

Sun Jul 21, 2013, 12:09 AM

Jul 2013

The opinions expressed by some of the posters (men
are simply coming from emotion and are not very informed. You are. You're addressing the nutritional needs of a baby, not the other stuff that has to do with judgment of a situation we don't have the full details of.

I had one child I breastfed. He would never take a bottle. Ever. Even from me. No matter what was in it, which included painfully extracted pumped breast milk.
I weaned him at 8 months pretty much to solid baby food and milk from a cup, just so I was able to leave him for more than 4 hours at a stretch.

Is it just me, or are the men's opinion's here just not really needed?
If you have not breast fed a baby, and been there to know just what that means, don't chime in and think you know what's best.
Kind of like: If you're against abortion, just don't the hell have one.

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Court orders mother to hand over nursing infant to father on weekends [View all] The Straight Story Jul 2013 OP

If she goes to jail, I don't think they let her bring the baby with her. hughee99 Jul 2013 #1

She'll keep Breast Feeding the kid for 2 or 3 years to keep him from the father FreakinDJ Jul 2013 #73

I suspect this is more about custody than breast feeding, too, hughee99 Jul 2013 #74

I suspect you're correct. Warpy Jul 2013 #361

She apparently hates the father more than she loves the child. nt. Mariana Jul 2013 #81

Like it or not, she's going to HappyMe Jul 2013 #2

You're sure she can? I know lots of women who had trouble with pumping, pnwmom Jul 2013 #16

No, I'm not sure. HappyMe Jul 2013 #21

He's clearly using the baby as a pawn pnwmom Jul 2013 #38

If that's what you want to think. HappyMe Jul 2013 #42

I agree with you. There's a lotta hate happening there, I suspect. MADem Jul 2013 #61

The mom is refusing to hand over the 2-yr old as well NickB79 Jul 2013 #63

She's risking contempt of court on the 2 year old. roamer65 Jul 2013 #100

no clarity that she refuses to hand over the 2yr old handmade34 Jul 2013 #167

Well I can tell you am a big breasted woman and I had an extremely hard time southernyankeebelle Jul 2013 #68

My wife is also well-endowed NickB79 Jul 2013 #69

Well go figure, LOL. I wonder why we are cursed that way. southernyankeebelle Jul 2013 #71

Not necessarily. phylny Jul 2013 #108

And no mother should deprive the father from taking care of his baby either. southernyankeebelle Jul 2013 #123

So sorry for your son's experience. phylny Jul 2013 #130

You think the father would put his child in a precarious position? I commend him for southernyankeebelle Jul 2013 #138

I don't know this father. phylny Jul 2013 #194

we don't really know that. all we are getting is her side of the story. believe me I have seen the southernyankeebelle Jul 2013 #275

Really - they breastfed? Ms. Toad Jul 2013 #400

Was your daughter-in-law breastfeeding her four month old full time? pnwmom Jul 2013 #213

At this point it's more important that the baby continue to breastfeed. Arugula Latte Jul 2013 #233

Totally agree. One of mine was the mule Phentex Jul 2013 #370

You had trouble breastfeeding, so your comment that "the mother can put her breast milk pnwmom Jul 2013 #121

Well just remember one thing when it comes to parents. There is her side, southernyankeebelle Jul 2013 #127

But in this case, xmas74 Jul 2013 #218

I don't buy it. Men can and have raised their infants even when mothers die god forbid. southernyankeebelle Jul 2013 #274

Nothing to do with stereotyping - Ms. Toad Jul 2013 #403

People can divorce and still have enough civility defacto7 Jul 2013 #221

no kidding. cali Jul 2013 #271

I can't argue that point. I agree. On the other hand what if the mother had died? That southernyankeebelle Jul 2013 #277

But we can see the best course of action for the baby, and that's to continue to be with the mom now Arugula Latte Jul 2013 #234

there is more to this story then we are getting. I don't believe that. Before I believe it southernyankeebelle Jul 2013 #276

Why? Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #356

The baby's health. Arugula Latte Jul 2013 #357

While I don't doubt the benefits of breastfeeding in shoring up the immune system of infants... Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #359

Alternatives do not always exist Ms. Toad Jul 2013 #404

It is indisputable that the infant is only four months old. pnwmom Jul 2013 #350

Uhm, hate to ask the obvious, but if that's true, doesn't that mean... Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #354

That's the opposite of what orphanage and adoption studies show. Experiences before pnwmom Jul 2013 #360

" I don't think this father has the best interest of the nursing baby in mind." opiate69 Jul 2013 #131

Some breastfed babies will not go to sleep without nursing womanofthehills Jul 2013 #295

yes I understand that. All am saying in this case we don't know everything. southernyankeebelle Jul 2013 #300

I'm small breasted Maine-ah Jul 2013 #325

Well I big busted and I couldn't get anything out. But I swear I had a friend who was small southernyankeebelle Jul 2013 #328

My kids didn't like bottle. Only wanted to breast feed. It is possible as a problem. ejpoeta Jul 2013 #366

agree. I had a hard time from the beginning. Every time my son latched on it hurt southernyankeebelle Jul 2013 #369

It was very painful for sure at times. I got some cream to help. My oldest I dried up ejpoeta Jul 2013 #372

I think it is neat if you can switch like that. southernyankeebelle Jul 2013 #424

And you don't think that influences Ms. Toad Jul 2013 #405

Breasting feeding is a personal thing. I never had a daughter but if she said she wanted southernyankeebelle Jul 2013 #423

My mother would have said she was not discouraging me - Ms. Toad Jul 2013 #429

Well maybe I wasn't aware I was doing it. southernyankeebelle Jul 2013 #430

My daughter refused to take a bottle. Ms. Toad Jul 2013 #399

Same here. Boudica the Lyoness Jul 2013 #200

I couldn't. xmas74 Jul 2013 #217

pump and freeze, don't dump. Maine-ah Jul 2013 #324

I work 10-12 hours away from my baby and pump 2-3 times during then Nikia Jul 2013 #393

Man, I'm really conflicted on this NickB79 Jul 2013 #3

It's false that a 4 month old has already gotten most of the benefits. The AAP recommends pnwmom Jul 2013 #15

Not sure he can shawn703 Jul 2013 #20

That isn't the custody agreement. HappyMe Jul 2013 #22

He's working 24/5? pnwmom Jul 2013 #35

Not everyone works 9am-5pm jobs NickB79 Jul 2013 #46

Oh FFS. HappyMe Jul 2013 #50

You are giving misleading information NickB79 Jul 2013 #26

You said MOST of the benefit was by the age of 4 months and that's false. pnwmom Jul 2013 #39

True, but that still doesn't support the mother's claim to the court NickB79 Jul 2013 #53

Formula feeding is not the "current standard" for raising a child. pnwmom Jul 2013 #122

in article... handmade34 Jul 2013 #169

Not nursing over the weekends could seriously compromise her milk supply too Bettie Jul 2013 #208

Read the story ceonupe Jul 2013 #133

Ah, the tender understanding of a judge SheilaT Jul 2013 #4

Caused my daughter no end of anguish to have to do that Hekate Jul 2013 #5

Yep. laundry_queen Jul 2013 #8

+10 RC Jul 2013 #31

Exactly. I had a good friend who had twins laundry_queen Jul 2013 #59

Post removed Post removed Jul 2013 #88

Explain that rude comment. Please. nt laundry_queen Jul 2013 #134

EarlG has shown the poster the door for misogyny! Spazito Jul 2013 #296

If fathers cared they wouldn't try to see their kids Union Scribe Jul 2013 #152

That's not what I said laundry_queen Jul 2013 #170

Some exes can be real asses. Unfortunately, there are times when avebury Jul 2013 #11

So basically you are saying fathers have rights, but certainly not equal rights of access... Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #304

Not what I said at all. Anyone, male or female, who can't distinguish between the needs of ... Hekate Jul 2013 #316

What needs do infants under 2 years of age need that can't be fulfilled by a father as easily as... Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #318

Well this one can, so she should be allowed to continue. Arugula Latte Jul 2013 #321

But would two days out of the week of bottle feeding be that traumatic? Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #322

Yes - two days would be detrimental MrsMatt Jul 2013 #338

I'm talking about detrimental to the infant, not the mother... Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #341

It doesn't - Ms. Toad Jul 2013 #406

You don't think it's detrimental to the infant who is being breastfeed to suddenly be removed womanofthehills Jul 2013 #409

She is selfish. Has it not occurred to her that she also would need avebury Jul 2013 #6

You've tried this arrangement, have you? Hekate Jul 2013 #7

I have not but I have worked with woman avebury Jul 2013 #19

Some women can and some can't gollygee Jul 2013 #24

There are milk banks that women use. Drahthaardogs Jul 2013 #128

And you have to almost empty your 401(k) Ilsa Jul 2013 #282

It happened pipi_k Jul 2013 #37

One of my good friends was lucky that her husband avebury Jul 2013 #45

Your good friend "had" to give up breastfeeding earlier than she had planned. pnwmom Jul 2013 #47

I'm going out on a limb here. I understand breast feeding is the best but... Democrat 4 Ever Jul 2013 #286

+1 - family dynamics have changed and breast feeding may not be viable - they should goto leftyohiolib Jul 2013 #312

In infancy, what the baby needs more than anything else is consistent, daily time with pnwmom Jul 2013 #320

Basically you are saying that working parents are psychologically damaging their children... Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #331

No, I didn't say that. I said that infants need daily care "at least part time" pnwmom Jul 2013 #349

OK, sometimes it was his mom, other times his dad... Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #353

I think your family sounds like a wonderful example pnwmom Jul 2013 #358

My mom couldn't take care of me for several months of the first year of my life... Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #367

I have some books about borderline personality disorder pnwmom Jul 2013 #374

I'm a mother Dorian Gray Jul 2013 #67

Who says she us trying to interfere with bonding? vanlassie Jul 2013 #111

+1 nt laundry_queen Jul 2013 #137

The two parents aren't allowed to have contact with each other. Mariana Jul 2013 #212

Now why do you think he is prohibited? vanlassie Jul 2013 #225

Maybe he threatened the mother. Mariana Jul 2013 #352

Because of innappropriate parental behavior. vanlassie Jul 2013 #363

I'd like to know how much visitation time Mariana Jul 2013 #368

Agree all the way. vanlassie Jul 2013 #384

You know nothing about breastfeeding or pumping. Millions of women do NOT pnwmom Jul 2013 #12

Precisely!! n/t Small Accumulates Jul 2013 #14

There have been several women at work who avebury Jul 2013 #28

All mammals nurse their young. Human babies don't even get their baby teeth till they're 6 or 7 pnwmom Jul 2013 #33

So true laundry_queen Jul 2013 #172

I know. And pumping by itself is much harder than nursing. n/t pnwmom Jul 2013 #177

I used to get plugged ducts when I pumped. nt laundry_queen Jul 2013 #184

Me, too. And infections. n/t pnwmom Jul 2013 #215

Did you not see this part of the story? Arugula Latte Jul 2013 #235

I also saw this part of the story. Mariana Jul 2013 #256

I saw that more as her trying to convey how strongly she felt about it. Arugula Latte Jul 2013 #319

Felt about what? I'm assuming denying the father his parental rights? Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #333

No. Ms. Toad Jul 2013 #431

Exactly! pipi_k Jul 2013 #327

Separation anxiety Cronus Protagonist Jul 2013 #9

My best friend's husband was fortunate to be able to work out avebury Jul 2013 #52

Is Lukes father going to breast feed him? fglad Jul 2013 #10

Nursing mothers and infants cannot be compassionately separated Small Accumulates Jul 2013 #13

I bet not a single person pushing pumps in this thread ever did it pnwmom Jul 2013 #17

I'm not a 'him'. HappyMe Jul 2013 #23

Have you ever pumped breast milk out of a breast?? pnwmom Jul 2013 #41

Since I was the single mother of HappyMe Jul 2013 #44

Did you have to go for two days in a row without nursing them? pnwmom Jul 2013 #49

You know, anything I say here HappyMe Jul 2013 #56

They're both 27? Both of them? Really? I find your story suspicious. Orrex Jul 2013 #165

Me too, HappyMe... Violet_Crumble Jul 2013 #58

I had trouble at first, but then it got better. HappyMe Jul 2013 #64

Not to hijack, but you give me hope!! kdmorris Jul 2013 #364

Due to whatever reasons the parents aren't allowed to have contact. tammywammy Jul 2013 #18

Social service agencies deal with this kind of situation routinely Small Accumulates Jul 2013 #30

Neither of my nurslings would have anything to do with a bottle... Hekate Jul 2013 #25

I'd like to hug the inventor of the sippy cup! Small Accumulates Jul 2013 #32

Mine was the same way...no artificial nipples for her!! Never accepted a rubber msanthrope Jul 2013 #125

contemptable bullshit. nt galileoreloaded Jul 2013 #79

Your rebuttal is overwhelming. N/t Small Accumulates Jul 2013 #173

hmmm handmade34 Jul 2013 #175

This mother of 4 (also all breastfed) agrees with you. nt laundry_queen Jul 2013 #198

Which is all you will ever produce. Starry Messenger Jul 2013 #207

I agree with you. SalviaBlue Jul 2013 #85

Horrendous damage? Major Nikon Jul 2013 #117

There! You've run rings around me logically! Small Accumulates Jul 2013 #174

Horrendous damage? Oh please... taught_me_patience Jul 2013 #179

Your post makes very good sense to me and I'm glad you wrote it. Mira Jul 2013 #185

Thanks Mira! Small Accumulates Jul 2013 #292

This is one of those impossible situations. RudynJack Jul 2013 #27

Novel idea... Do what is BEST for the baby. I'm not saying what that is, but the judge hlthe2b Jul 2013 #34

Honestly... RudynJack Jul 2013 #54

wiser words were never spoken... handmade34 Jul 2013 #180

Baby's rights trump that of either parent. pnwmom Jul 2013 #43

I see this RudynJack Jul 2013 #51

I'm intrigued at how much overlap there is between the "rights of the baby" lumberjack_jeff Jul 2013 #57

And did you read the bit in the article where she also refused to let him have the 2 year old? Violet_Crumble Jul 2013 #65

People do seem to forget that the "rights of the baby" Mariana Jul 2013 #76

Summed up PERFECTLY in a mere 27 words. Spot-fucking-on. opiate69 Jul 2013 #92

There is no actual need to be breasfed mythology Jul 2013 #86

He has rights to see his kids Mariana Jul 2013 #93

Agreed 100%. This should be a no brainer. morningfog Jul 2013 #116

I wonder how long the father would be willing to try with a bottle and formula. Brickbat Jul 2013 #29

My thoughts exactly. MissB Jul 2013 #109

You're right--fathers are generally less dedicated than mothers Orrex Jul 2013 #162

Heh. Not exactly what I was saying, although I can see how it comes across that way. Brickbat Jul 2013 #281

LOL. Don't worry--I knew what you meant. Orrex Jul 2013 #288

I wonder which parent would agree to a Solomonic decree. WinkyDink Jul 2013 #36

I suspect, the judge was a male ConcernedCanuk Jul 2013 #40

Bull. The judge knows FAR more about this family TorchTheWitch Jul 2013 #262

Good. lumberjack_jeff Jul 2013 #48

It makes one weigh the benefits, that's for sure NickB79 Jul 2013 #60

Very bad. It is bad for the baby. That is what should be the guiding decision here. morningfog Jul 2013 #113

LOL laundry_queen Jul 2013 #201

It is unusual, and I wonder why such an order was made. Mariana Jul 2013 #263

I remember an OP I did several years back Le Taz Hot Jul 2013 #273

"I'm a lifelong feminist so I'm not sure how that works" ElboRuum Jul 2013 #308

And so... pipi_k Jul 2013 #55

Yeah, Dorian Gray Jul 2013 #70

I agree alarimer Jul 2013 #106

Send her to jail. The dad deserves to see the kid also. n-t Logical Jul 2013 #62

And the kid deserves to see his dad. nt. Mariana Jul 2013 #97

About the only thing that Mens' Rights Advocates get right is in aptly naming galileoreloaded Jul 2013 #66

That could cause some real health issues for the mom too. But I would just hand him the baby. appleannie1 Jul 2013 #72

Yeah, because men are completely incapable of dealing with babies NickB79 Jul 2013 #75

Well, it says in the article that the baby won't accept a bottle gollygee Jul 2013 #78

I practically raised our daughter the first 6 mo. NickB79 Jul 2013 #82

Fathers and mothers can both be wonderful caregivers gollygee Jul 2013 #83

No, the article doesn't say that. Mariana Jul 2013 #84

I acknowledged that gollygee Jul 2013 #87

A lot of breast fed babies refuse bottles. appleannie1 Jul 2013 #91

I never said men can't take care of babies. The baby will not take a bottle and unless something appleannie1 Jul 2013 #90

The mother said the baby won't take a bottle. tammywammy Jul 2013 #96

A lot of breast fed babies won't take a bottle. Also, there has to be a reason the parents are appleannie1 Jul 2013 #98

I'm sure if there was abuse the woman wouldn't have hesistated to mention it tammywammy Jul 2013 #101

Post removed Post removed Jul 2013 #77

Funny how the only kind of sexism you acknowledge BainsBane Jul 2013 #95

That poster has FINALLY left the building mtnester Jul 2013 #377

Praise be to EarlG BainsBane Jul 2013 #378

One would think... opiate69 Jul 2013 #385

Really? BainsBane Jul 2013 #386

When did I ever suggest you had?? opiate69 Jul 2013 #388

If I had approached his level of behavior BainsBane Jul 2013 #389

When did I ever BainsBane Jul 2013 #387

So nothing says "motherhood" like guaranteeing a hungry child? lumberjack_jeff Jul 2013 #105

No shit... spot on.. opiate69 Jul 2013 #114

^This. Union Scribe Jul 2013 #156

This isn't 1950 Major Nikon Jul 2013 #118

It took my grandaughters boyfriend about 5 hrs womanofthehills Jul 2013 #411

The children have the right to spend time with their father. Mariana Jul 2013 #80

The infant belongs with the mother until weaned. roamer65 Jul 2013 #89

If the baby is the most important factor here, then both the parents are ZombieHorde Jul 2013 #94

+1 nomorenomore08 Jul 2013 #99

So they should stay together "for the sake of the kids"?? opiate69 Jul 2013 #107

Is the well being of the baby the most important factor? nt ZombieHorde Jul 2013 #115

It most assuredly is. opiate69 Jul 2013 #119

If people have free will, then they choose to not fuction together. nt ZombieHorde Jul 2013 #120

Spoken like someone who's never seen, much less been in, a relationship. opiate69 Jul 2013 #126

I've been in a relationship with the same person for 13 years. ZombieHorde Jul 2013 #146

Ive been in one with the same person for 15+... opiate69 Jul 2013 #149

If people can choose how they behave, ZombieHorde Jul 2013 #163

Well... opiate69 Jul 2013 #176

I agree with you, but that is not a child-first perspective. nt ZombieHorde Jul 2013 #178

It appears, then, we have reached a detente. opiate69 Jul 2013 #196

Sleep well. nt ZombieHorde Jul 2013 #206

No, but I would say they behave like adults BainsBane Jul 2013 #223

More misogyny on DU. This place sickens me sometimes. Nine Jul 2013 #102

Then one has to wonder why you stick around Major Nikon Jul 2013 #124

Did it ever occur to you BainsBane Jul 2013 #224

Captain Obvious to the rescue Major Nikon Jul 2013 #227

You were the one throwing around charges of misandry BainsBane Jul 2013 #229

Says the person who sees misogyny behind every tree Major Nikon Jul 2013 #230

You could actually ask me what my views are BainsBane Jul 2013 #231

I actually tried that once Major Nikon Jul 2013 #232

Oh, about that study from the 1980s BainsBane Jul 2013 #236

No, it was about exactly what I said Major Nikon Jul 2013 #241

I recall saying BainsBane Jul 2013 #245

+1 Liberal_in_LA Jul 2013 #202

Well, some babies do flat out refuse the bottle for a long time rebecca_herman Jul 2013 #103

Bah. Put both parents in jail cells and don't let them out until they can behave like adults. hunter Jul 2013 #104

Breeders....amiright?? Inkfreak Jul 2013 #110

youberight Mushroom Jul 2013 #283

So much offensive bullshit in this thread. This is like a men's rights wet dream. morningfog Jul 2013 #112

Because you don't like the decision, the judge "must have been a male" Major Nikon Jul 2013 #129

I would put money on it being a male judge. morningfog Jul 2013 #132

As if breastfeeding is beyond the scope of reason Major Nikon Jul 2013 #135

I am a dude, dude. morningfog Jul 2013 #139

I could care less Major Nikon Jul 2013 #140

In this case, the lack of reason almost assuredly came from a man. morningfog Jul 2013 #141

Very telling Major Nikon Jul 2013 #142

I bet this gets reversed on appeal. One idiot judge made a dumbass order. morningfog Jul 2013 #136

I'll ask you the same thing i asked pnw... opiate69 Jul 2013 #143

Because he's a man Major Nikon Jul 2013 #144

(psst.. ixnay on the isandrymay ... we made the concept up, remember?) opiate69 Jul 2013 #148

He is clearly insisting on preventing his child from the benefits of breastfeeding. morningfog Jul 2013 #145

Yes... damn him for demanding his rights be upheld... opiate69 Jul 2013 #147

If he is putting his rights above the baby's interests, morningfog Jul 2013 #151

The childs best interest is not in jeopardy if other solutions for his feeding are available. opiate69 Jul 2013 #154

Breastfeeding is recommeded as the sole source for at least 6 months, and morningfog Jul 2013 #155

The court order awards him custody for two days per week... opiate69 Jul 2013 #159

His idea of "best interests" also completely negates any benefit the child/father relationship has Major Nikon Jul 2013 #181

telling, indeed.. opiate69 Jul 2013 #182

He is doing no such thing Major Nikon Jul 2013 #150

Bullshit. You are ignorant to how breast feeding works. morningfog Jul 2013 #153

Egocentrism on your part is another possibility Major Nikon Jul 2013 #157

Post removed Post removed Jul 2013 #158

Please don't throw me into the briar patch Major Nikon Jul 2013 #161

Heh.. guess he doesn't have to go through the trouble of trashing the thread now... opiate69 Jul 2013 #171

Silver lining Major Nikon Jul 2013 #280

As a former breast-feeding mum, I'm not ignorant about it... Violet_Crumble Jul 2013 #160

Her story betrays a much more simple explanation Major Nikon Jul 2013 #164

Yep, explanation 2's looking the far more likely one to me... Violet_Crumble Jul 2013 #168

I'm one of those women laundry_queen Jul 2013 #183

I've never heard of a child starving to death because they wouldn't take a bottle Major Nikon Jul 2013 #191

I lived in an area where pumps weren't accessible laundry_queen Jul 2013 #197

Few things are more unnerving to a parent than a crying baby Major Nikon Jul 2013 #205

Starving to death isn't the issue. yewberry Jul 2013 #203

You're assuming that would actually happen Major Nikon Jul 2013 #209

No, I am allowing for worst-case scenarios. Not assuming. yewberry Jul 2013 #216

Worst case is the child dies of starvation Major Nikon Jul 2013 #220

As a speech-language pathologist and feeding therapist, phylny Jul 2013 #323

So do you have any statistics on what rate that happens? Major Nikon Jul 2013 #330

So yes, I do. phylny Jul 2013 #394

I didn't find anything that shows how many severe cases there are Major Nikon Jul 2013 #398

Well, there are enough that there are whole specialties devoted to phylny Jul 2013 #407

The court *acting in the best interests of the child* has decreed weekend visitation. lumberjack_jeff Jul 2013 #297

Have we determined if The Olive Garden is involved? Orrex Jul 2013 #166

Who's got the calendar handy? Aren't we due for a circumcision flamewar soon? opiate69 Jul 2013 #186

I need to make a new one. Warren DeMontague Jul 2013 #188

Ha! August! I wuz right!!! opiate69 Jul 2013 #189

You know, since I made that I have searched and searched for the picture of the scientist with the Warren DeMontague Jul 2013 #190

Heh... I have a similar "white whale"... opiate69 Jul 2013 #192

Message auto-removed Name removed Jul 2013 #347

Awesome! Warren DeMontague Jul 2013 #375

August started early this year BainsBane Jul 2013 #413

lol! opiate69 Jul 2013 #414

In that same vein BainsBane Jul 2013 #415

Good gods, they'll have a contest for anything, won't they? opiate69 Jul 2013 #416

This is the best part BainsBane Jul 2013 #417

Whoda thought there were so many people willing to share their um.... opiate69 Jul 2013 #419

I think, here, the court is wrong. Warren DeMontague Jul 2013 #187

Pretty hard to make that determination Major Nikon Jul 2013 #210

Here's the thing: Biologically speaking I know how intensive and restrictive dedicated breastfeeding Warren DeMontague Jul 2013 #214

Again all you are going on is one side of the story Major Nikon Jul 2013 #219

He's going on his knowledge of human biology and experience with his own children BainsBane Jul 2013 #228

You have little idea how much milk she can pump Major Nikon Jul 2013 #237

Really? If that is a possible hypothesis BainsBane Jul 2013 #239

Is 2360 enough? Major Nikon Jul 2013 #240

but those women aren't feeding babies at the time BainsBane Jul 2013 #242

... Major Nikon Jul 2013 #243

Okay BainsBane Jul 2013 #246

Different subject Major Nikon Jul 2013 #247

So all those enslaved women BainsBane Jul 2013 #248

Perhaps Major Nikon Jul 2013 #254

That strange reason BainsBane Jul 2013 #257

So you felt the need to throw out irrelevant information because you're a self described expert Major Nikon Jul 2013 #261

I could have gone with my sister's experience BainsBane Jul 2013 #379

There is a limited amount of information in the story, period, to be sure. Warren DeMontague Jul 2013 #250

The story doesn't give much information regarding what was ordered Major Nikon Jul 2013 #259

Nah, and I don't think I've said that. Warren DeMontague Jul 2013 #260

That was exactly my impression as well Major Nikon Jul 2013 #264

Well, here's the other thing, speaking of data points that can't be twisted or misrepresented; Warren DeMontague Jul 2013 #265

All the more reason for the dad to be involved Major Nikon Jul 2013 #266

I hear you. Warren DeMontague Jul 2013 #267

One would hope that it's just a matter of differing thoughts on what's best for him Major Nikon Jul 2013 #268

Yeah, I'm kind of on that in the other post I'm writing downthread. Warren DeMontague Jul 2013 #269

You miss things you don't ever get back Mariana Jul 2013 #397

There is a lot missing in this story kdmorris Jul 2013 #348

Oh, Oh BainsBane Jul 2013 #226

I'd say that assesment of the position -that it's misandry- is wrong, too. Warren DeMontague Jul 2013 #249

Well some in this thead BainsBane Jul 2013 #251

And praise to Jesus, Odin and Thor we don't have meta anymore. Warren DeMontague Jul 2013 #253

that reminds me of a lounge thread BainsBane Jul 2013 #255

Heh. Warren DeMontague Jul 2013 #258

Once again, you've put your keen and penetrating mind to the task, Snape, opiate69 Jul 2013 #334

I have no idea what you are going on about BainsBane Jul 2013 #376

They're from this very thread.. but just go ahead and keep your fingers firmly in your ears opiate69 Jul 2013 #381

No thank you BainsBane Jul 2013 #383

I'd say both parents are acting inappropriately. yewberry Jul 2013 #193

It appears that 'The Patriarchy' all overt the world, is coming totally unhinged. DeSwiss Jul 2013 #195

you got all that from a custody dispute involving a 4 mo. old? Warren DeMontague Jul 2013 #270

It's unnatural to take a 4 month Boudica the Lyoness Jul 2013 #199

Then they need to find a way to work out visits Mariana Jul 2013 #222

It doesn't matter how she comes off in a newspaper article Boudica the Lyoness Jul 2013 #332

What do you mean by this? Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #337

Yeah, really, WFT? I'm a grandmother Mariana Jul 2013 #343

Overnight stays with my nephew were cool, he slept through the night... Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #344

You are right on the last part, it is a somewhat unusual order for a judge to get involved directly. Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #345

"Right now the baby belongs with his mother." Orrex Jul 2013 #340

She is arguing that, she's also arguing, I think, that men are incapable of taking care of infants. Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #342

she will lose custody if the father wants to pursue charges Sunlei Jul 2013 #204

My son wouldn't take Peaceplace80 Jul 2013 #211

Mine wouldn't bottlefeed, either. They hated pacifiers, Ilsa Jul 2013 #284

The knee-jerking in this thread is unbelievable LittleBlue Jul 2013 #238

Welcome to DU Major Nikon Jul 2013 #244

+1 davidpdx Jul 2013 #272

Is the father a bad person? B Calm Jul 2013 #252

From what I can tell on this thread, to some people, the father has no more right to see his... Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #287

A little more information to ponder ConcernedCanuk Jul 2013 #278

Interesting read The Straight Story Jul 2013 #302

+1! ConcernedCanuk Jul 2013 #307

pump it and freeze it... ileus Jul 2013 #279

I don't believe it freezes well BainsBane Jul 2013 #382

you can freeze breastmilk. i am not aware of any negatives to it. ejpoeta Jul 2013 #432

. ConcernedCanuk Jul 2013 #285

Curious that you didn't hope to create empathy for the father. Orrex Jul 2013 #289

Where's the photo of dad? lumberjack_jeff Jul 2013 #298

Good question! ConcernedCanuk Jul 2013 #305

What plight? Why use biased words here, we have one side of the story... Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #311

"as far as we know" - well let the MAN speak up! ConcernedCanuk Jul 2013 #317

You bring up nationality like it matters in this case, why? Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #326

Those are good questions. Mariana Jul 2013 #418

Do fathers not exist in your world? Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #303

Unfortunately, my father passed away 6 years ago at the age of 95. ConcernedCanuk Jul 2013 #310

My mother just recently passed, dad is still alive... Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #313

A disinterested family law lawyer says this is very out of the ordinary. Nine Jul 2013 #290

the fact that she's denying visitation for the 2 year old as well is evidence of bad faith. n/t lumberjack_jeff Jul 2013 #299

I don't know all the details. Nine Jul 2013 #329

What if the mother should suddenly be unable to produce milk? Orrex Jul 2013 #336

I don't understand it either, and a lot of things can happen to prevent safe breastfeeding... Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #339

You think such situations are always resolved satisfactorily? Nine Jul 2013 #351

Spare me your righteousness Orrex Jul 2013 #362

I think "rights" as used in this thread kind of misses the point. lumberjack_jeff Jul 2013 #391

This is precisely true. Ilsa Jul 2013 #396

she should get brief nursing visits during the weekends until the baby is weaned. librechik Jul 2013 #291

It is good that the child will benefit from time spent with his father. n/t leeroysphitz Jul 2013 #293

Right davidpdx Jul 2013 #294

Because the justice system Turbineguy Jul 2013 #301

This is my solution dsc Jul 2013 #306

My solution is that if they aren't mature enough to deal with each other... Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #309

Nothing indicates the children are suffering under their mother's care. ConcernedCanuk Jul 2013 #314

No evidence they will suffer under the father's care as well... Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #315

I don't know pipi_k Jul 2013 #371

It was partially tongue in cheek, though also just venting some frustration... Humanist_Activist Jul 2013 #373

Yeah, pretty common pipi_k Jul 2013 #395

The child deserves time with his father... theHandpuppet Jul 2013 #335

The divorce was worse for the kids than missing breastfeeding. gulliver Jul 2013 #346

Some of the comments are disgusting here. ChairmanAgnostic Jul 2013 #355

She cares so much about her kids well being CC Jul 2013 #365

Absent life threatening abuse, I would not separate from my husband for this reason Nikia Jul 2013 #390

Reasonable. Mom can either drop off the kids as ordered or go to jail... Demo_Chris Jul 2013 #392

Lots of ignorance in this thread Spades3351 Jul 2013 #401

Welcome to DU! The Straight Story Jul 2013 #402

Thanks! Spades3351 Jul 2013 #408

Well stick around and jump into some more threads The Straight Story Jul 2013 #410

No Problem Spades3351 Jul 2013 #412

Welcome! Nine Jul 2013 #427

Choose the father carefully lindisfarne Jul 2013 #420

The child won't be bonding with either parent Spades3351 Jul 2013 #422

I've been watching this OP hang at the top of GD for a while now Fumesucker Jul 2013 #421

I think the really important question is "why is there no post 380?" Orrex Jul 2013 #425

The dad is considering his own self to the exclusion of all others Evergreen Emerald Jul 2013 #426

Actually we have no idea what led to this court decision tammywammy Jul 2013 #428

ouchy Evergreen Emerald Jul 2013 #433