Freedom From Religion : A Fearless Young Woman Takes a Stand

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37. "Sticking up for your beliefs:" the sliding Republican rating scale

Republicans have different reactions if you tell them that you stick up for your beliefs:

Christian: you are a good American!

Muslim: you are a terrrrrist!

Jewish: welllll, if you support Israel's military, don't live in my neighborhood and shut up about the rest, I guess.....

Hindu, Animist, Buddhist, Zoroastrian, Wiccan, Rasta, etc. etc.: if ya gotta, but not here!!

Atheist: you traitor and ally of Satan!!

Sing this to the tune of "The Locomotion:"

("The Evolution&quot

Now that you believe it, come join the cult now,
(Come on, baby, don’t teach evolution)
Tell your children’s teacher there’s a new result, now
(Come on, baby, don’t teach evolution)
What Darwin found is causing me a lot of grief
Religion’s free as long as it is MY belief!
So come on, come on, don’t teach evolution to me!
You gotta bite your tongue, now. Come on baby.
Turn back your clocks. Fossils are just some odd-shaped rocks!

I believe I have been called to lead the nation
(Come on, baby, don’t teach evolution)
I think I read it in the Book of Revelation
(Come on, baby, don’t teach evolution)
It may look like Mitt or Santorum has the lead
But my religion’s pure, and that is what you need!
So come on, come on, don’t teach evolution to me!
Yes, come on, come on, don't teach evolution to me!