Calling Bradley Manning a She---Educate me DU.

[Ms. Toad]

21. How trans* individuals refer to themselves in the past

is not uniform. Not necessarily even if you only look only at one person.

The person, outside of my family, I'm closest to is my high school sweetheart. She transitioned less than a year ago. Because of the role her gender identity played in our relationship and our lives - even though she did not come out to me until three years ago - we use female pronouns for our relationship of more than 4 decades. That is not true of how she (and people she cares about) refer to her past universally. I also have a friend who is one of the most assertive about inadvertent gender slips - who is still called dad by her daughter. So - for the past, you have to work it out with the individual. If you know the person well enough to know the are a trans* individual, you know them well enough to ask what gender pronouns they prefer you use when referring to their past.

Going forward, yes it is wrong (or at least hurtful) to say "no---he's still a Man, not a Woman."

The phrase used most often these days is "preferred gender pronoun." Whatever pronoun a person asks be used is the one which should be used. Chelsea Manning has requested female pronouns be used - so you should use them.

(It's also gender identity or expression - orientation is more frequently used when referring to sexual partners, not how you view or express yourself.)

Legal status is a different question - mostly you won't interact with people based on their legal status so you don't need to worry about it. On the off chance you do (for example you are working with official records, for example), any trans* individual is aware of the ambiguities and challenges a gender which does not match the legally recognized gender creates. Be respectful, use the preferred gender pronouns in speaking with the individual (regardless of what may need to be put in the records), and be empathetic about the challenges the disconnect between reality and legality creates.