Message from the President to U.S. Government Employees

[mnhtnbb]

2. Can you imagine a similar letter being written by Boehner?

Here's a stab at it:

To the lazy people who work for the Federal Government who decline to go out and get a real job:

The Republican Party has been wanting to drown you all in a bathtub for some time! Please enjoy
your bath.

It is critically important that the Republican Party continue to fight on behalf of the wealthiest
people in this country for their right to fuck everyone else. That is our mission, and we will do everything
possible to achieve its success. Making sure that people have access to health insurance goes
against the very core of our beliefs, which include the principle that if you are unlucky enough
to be poor, unemployed, or struck with a catastrophic illness, you should just die. So,
you see, we must do everything we can--which includes shutting down the government--
to put you in that position. Oh, fuck. Just die, will you?

Sincerely,

John Boehner