General Discussion

SharonAnn

(14,176 posts)

55. My stepson died at 41 of a massive heart attack. Probably preventable.

Tue Oct 29, 2013, 11:31 AM

Oct 2013

He'd had "really bad indigestion for a couple of days" according to his coworkers and was taking lots of OTC antacid medicine. He died in his sleep.

The autopsy showed massive blockage of the arteries, 100% and 90% and that he'd had a significant heart attack within the last year. Turns out that 6 months earlier he'd had the same symptoms but they'd eventually "gone away". But I had talked to him several times during those months and he'd said he just felt tired all the time and depressed. That was not like him at all, so I kept suggesting he see a doctor. He said "I hate doctors!", of course I already knew that. However, if I'd been living in the same city I probably would've dragged him to a doctor and we would've learned that he had incredibly high cholesterol and would've checked further. He was thin and always had been, but he smoked heavily which contributed.

Supposedly his hatred of doctors had something to do with his early years with his mother and all the "cod liver oil" type stuff. I really don't know. It's just so sad that treatment was available but went unused. Perhaps this is why single men die younger, they don't have a spouse to drag them to the doctor when "things aren't right".

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Where do our sons learn not to go to the doctors? Does that now create a social burden? [View all] HereSince1628 Oct 2013 OP

That's a great point, and I just want to add my opinion from here polly7 Oct 2013 #1

American waiting rooms have similar messages...not seen unless you are there HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #2

We get so many commercials / psa's on a lot of our local tv channels stressing polly7 Oct 2013 #4

A Check on Physicals FarCenter Oct 2013 #3

Sort of doesn't look like basic preventive care available under the ACA HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #7

I think the real 'social problem' is the built in promise of profit for Insurance Companies. Bluenorthwest Oct 2013 #12

My stepson died at 41 of a massive heart attack. Probably preventable. SharonAnn Oct 2013 #55

Did you have his cholesterol level measured during the autopsy? FarCenter Oct 2013 #59

Lately we have learned that cholesterol is not the problem, inflammation is. grasswire Oct 2013 #78

And statins probably work as anti-inflammatories, rather than by cholesterol lowering. FarCenter Oct 2013 #79

exactly grasswire Oct 2013 #81

It doesn't matter how statins work; it only matters that they do FarCenter Oct 2013 #82

"No one questions the importance of regular exams for (insert demographic here)" lumberjack_jeff Oct 2013 #70

The question is whether a routine exam results in finding something that can be prevented FarCenter Oct 2013 #72

Doesn't that mean though that the long term cost for men should be higher? Fumesucker Oct 2013 #5

Yes, certainly for preventive care and early treatment HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #10

I'm not sure which part of my post you're agreeing with Fumesucker Oct 2013 #13

Well, your claim seems to reference a data point... HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #17

Silly me, referencing data when everyone knows better Fumesucker Oct 2013 #20

Where is some proof that all things being equal, men have a 'habit' of not seeing doctors while Bluenorthwest Oct 2013 #16

It's widely known that men don't seek medical care...here are newspaper articles HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #18

+1. That idea deserves consideration. bemildred Oct 2013 #26

The lifetime cost for women's health care is 1/3 more, largely due to longer lifespan. lumberjack_jeff Oct 2013 #56

"if you're well enough to crawl to the bathroom, young man, you're well enough for school!" MindPilot Oct 2013 #6

Yes, but a study not long ago also suggested machismo was a factor HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #21

Girl here. My mother said the exact same thing. ScreamingMeemie Oct 2013 #23

Boss said work's more important n/t seabeckind Oct 2013 #8

I'm sure that attendance rules for work do influence people's choices. HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #31

Do you have any sort of figures or stats to support your assumption that men as a whole have Bluenorthwest Oct 2013 #9

I can't make the Census Bureau's Stat link work... HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #15

Going to more appointments is not much proof of your assertions Bluenorthwest Oct 2013 #24

Another reference to the Census Bureau analysis HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #29

So 57% vs 74%? A 15 point difference is all this is about? Interesting take to lump all men Bluenorthwest Oct 2013 #37

Actually, those numbers are on percents of people having vistis, not numbers of visits HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #51

74% is 30% more than 57% lumberjack_jeff Oct 2013 #85

The difference you cite is in percents for each seeing a doctor at least once HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #92

This message was self-deleted by its author seaglass Oct 2013 #11

See post #6 Fumesucker Oct 2013 #14

That poster says he does not go to the doctor because of how his Mother dealt with doctors. Bluenorthwest Oct 2013 #28

I understand that for this to work everyone has to have insurance. That's what the liberal_at_heart Oct 2013 #19

I suspect we've always been subject to the will of culture HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #25

but people will still play football and people will still let their children play football. liberal_at_heart Oct 2013 #27

You can also think about the introduction and acceptance of seat belts and car seats HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #30

I know people that don't wear seat belts, and I know people who only wear seat belts because liberal_at_heart Oct 2013 #35

Yes, a specific action is public education to create cultural awareness and peer pressure. HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #38

I am a sugar addict. Shame does not work on me. I try my best to be healthy but it is my damn liberal_at_heart Oct 2013 #39

The customer service is absolutely abhorrent. JVS Oct 2013 #22

Let us get real! daybranch Oct 2013 #32

That's the state of affairs relative to macho. I'm sure The Marlboro Man felt that way early on HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #36

Pffffft! Good Luck With That BKH70041 Oct 2013 #33

But they are at high risk for injury, accidents. They should understand that. Arugula Latte Oct 2013 #46

In the last 40 years I have been to a Dr. about once a decade. former9thward Oct 2013 #34

What has been, is not what should or must be. HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #44

I think it is best to be your own Dr. former9thward Oct 2013 #47

My daughter amazes me. She will come to me and say hey mom I was feeling this way so I looked liberal_at_heart Oct 2013 #49

Our young people learn from their parents and other elders. Bluenorthwest Oct 2013 #40

I'm sure calling men slackers and a burden will get them to the Dr. right away The2ndWheel Oct 2013 #41

I think "forcing" rather overstates the case to make a strawman HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #42

all I can say is good luck with that. People's apprehension to go to the doctor runs deep. liberal_at_heart Oct 2013 #43

Another problem with the "habit of men"? sibelian Oct 2013 #45

I suppose never going could be a problem. HappyMe Oct 2013 #48

I don't think it's an exclusive problem of men, either HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #52

I'm not interested in getting into a gender war. HappyMe Oct 2013 #57

I work with a guy that hasn't had a physical in years tammywammy Oct 2013 #50

Making insurance mandatory will encourage men to get the preventive care they need. lumberjack_jeff Oct 2013 #53

I'm think historic and current attitudes give legitimacy to an unfortunate pov HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #60

Young men are roughly 20% more likely to be uninsured than young women. lumberjack_jeff Oct 2013 #67

Certainly cost and access are important HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #71

YOU TRY GETTING A FINGER UP THE BUM!!! Capt. Obvious Oct 2013 #54

I must admit it would be difficult to do a prostate palpation self-exam HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #76

I'm just glad my doc gets me drunk first. AngryAmish Oct 2013 #87

I don't really understand that. HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #89

I guess you just missed that one, then. AngryAmish Oct 2013 #91

I don't think sons are taught to NOT go to the doctors.. It's just that girls SoCalDem Oct 2013 #58

I'm not sure that being married means more preventive care visits for men HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #61

Every wife I have met has been the one who talked husbands into them SoCalDem Oct 2013 #62

I have no doubt that is true...the question is does that enable a reasonably general inference? HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #64

Men are procrastinators, to be sure SoCalDem Oct 2013 #65

It seems to be something. HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #66

some women bug their husband until they go to the doctor. Sometimes it works, sometimes it liberal_at_heart Oct 2013 #63

Why I don't go to the doctor for preventive care... subterranean Oct 2013 #68

As a man, I mainly don't like ceding control to the GP or primary care physician. Gidney N Cloyd Oct 2013 #69

My experience has been different, but that's the thing about personal experience. HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #73

I'm a 39 year old man. Until recently, I could count all my adult doctor visits on one hand. Xithras Oct 2013 #74

Yes, social conditioning almost is certainly involved HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #75

Of course, it may not be a bad thing. Xithras Oct 2013 #84

I'm not really sure about that. HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #86

High blood pressure among young men is uncommon. Xithras Oct 2013 #90

I see, it's about the way you see fair-sharing personal risk HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #94

so, you are defending not taking care of your health basically. well for one thing, bettyellen Oct 2013 #99

Proof of that? AngryAmish Oct 2013 #88

Girls are start visits to the doctor early in life liberal N proud Oct 2013 #77

Really? My visits started at age 9 and happened annually HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #80

Our atletic physicals were done in school by a retired osteopath. liberal N proud Oct 2013 #96

Do you know if such physicals are still required for kids? HereSince1628 Oct 2013 #97

They are required now liberal N proud Oct 2013 #98

Maybe this will inspire them to take advantage of their coverage lumberjack_jeff Oct 2013 #83

Average persons insurance plan - don't get sick. Rex Oct 2013 #93

Such a relief to break the employment for insurance chains!! bettyellen Oct 2013 #100

Conservatives think illness is a moral failing. It's not just macho. Manifestor_of_Light Oct 2013 #95

"Social burden"? Maybe. Is the fact that they're dying also a consideration? n/t lumberjack_jeff Oct 2013 #101

I didn't go for many years gopiscrap Oct 2013 #102