Question: Why Do MEN Have ANY Say In A WOMAN'S Right To Choose ???

[moriah]

185. I find it silly to argue with them about the point.

I also find it unnecessary to do so, when I use comparisons to born beings to express why forcing anyone to have their bodily autonomy violated to save a life is wrong.

I often only end up having this discussion with people who are very pro-life. I've had an abortion, and one of them actually stopped me before I could start to tell about the situation that he didn't want to know if I'd ever "killed my child" because he didn't think he could look at me the same way. I was far younger, had no family that I could depend on (was actually caring for my mother who was psychotic at the time, my dad was a deadbeat drug addict dying of HIV and on SSI), and while I regret that it was necessary I do not regret the choice I made, given the circumstances I was in.

His opinions were due to a very early pregnancy loss (ectopic) that reduced his wife's fertility. I think he felt like it was an abortion, even though it was necessary to save his wife's life, and that's part of why he was so touchy on the subject. I also suspect, since it was unplanned, that he'd been ambivalent about the pregnancy until it ended. But I'm not about to say either of those things to him, except that I felt that treatment of ectopic pregnancies in Catholic hospitals was piss-poor, and explained why. In his wife's case, they didn't catch it until it was too late to save the tube anyway, but he agreed that methotrexate use was better for the woman if possible.... so he's not as fanatical as some.

Still, at least in debates with them, I don't bother to argue the point. It's semantics, terminology, and often it's easier to speak to people in their own language.