I think people should, in general, choose not to have abortions

[Hekate]

206. Bryant, I understand your point of view and your journey

Thank you for making the personal journey to understand women's needs. I'm sorry that too often DU simply has flame-fests rather than trying to understand different povs, but there it is.

I also had to make an interior journey, as I'm probably the age of your parents. That's why I understand Hillary Clinton's formulation "Safe, legal, and rare." I became pro-choice in college, but without the fury of the front-line feminists (though we needed their fire, and still do).

I keep learning. I learned how lucky I am: that my high school boyfriend was scared of too-early marriage, that I was able to obtain the Pill when I was in college, and that it worked for me. That I was never raped, as a friend of mine was -- abortion was legal by then, but in order to get one she had to buy a plane ticket to another state. It goes on and on. I'm a good planner, but I learned how much sheer luck plays a part.

Women very close to me have had abortions, sometimes more than one. A friend younger than I had a legal abortion in her senior year of high school, because it just made sense for her entire future; then in her late 30s her contraceptive failed, and though she wanted a 3rd child in her family, her husband was adamant they couldn't manage it. It's never casual or easy. I never judge.

The older I get (now 66) the more pro-choice I become; I have realized with dismay that the true anti-choicers are going to take away the very means of preventing pregnancy if they have their way. They have to be stopped. They are the reason we are having this discord here.

But let me say this: I honor your journey, as you honor our ability to choose. You are alive. Your birth-mother looked at that fork in the road of her life and made that choice. And I honor your journey.