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A HERETIC I AM

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64. A doctor, a lawyer and an engineer are playing golf...

Mon Dec 9, 2013, 12:50 AM

Dec 2013

when they come up on a foursome playing VERY slowly.

They flag down the course marshal and complain about the pace of play.

"Take it easy fellas" says the marshal. "Those are four firemen who saved our clubhouse from burning down last year. Unfortunately, they were all blinded by the flames so we let them play for free. Just have some patience, please."

Well, our 3-some is now feeling a bit embarrassed. The doctor says "That is horrible. You know, I have some friends at the state university who are doing groundbreaking work on sight restoration. I'll get them to check these guys and perhaps get them their sight back."

The Lawyer says "Oh my, that is just horrible. I'll get my friends on the state bar association to set up a fund to pay for any therapy they might need as well as education for their children."

The engineer says....

"Why can't they play at night?"

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Enough of dumb jokes, here are some intellectual jokes [View all] flamingdem Dec 2013 OP

well, if these are intelectual, then clydefrand Dec 2013 #1

Love it! Thanks crazylikafox Dec 2013 #2

Blonds are not as dumb as lawyers: bemildred Dec 2013 #3

Another Smart Blonde Joke Captain Stern Dec 2013 #4

+1. Yes. nt bemildred Dec 2013 #6

One of my favorites, thanks. Egalitarian Thug Dec 2013 #44

THAT is a cool joke. WinkyDink Dec 2013 #27

It's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally. n/t lumberjack_jeff Dec 2013 #5

There's a place worse than hell for people like you Demeter Dec 2013 #13

Dave Berry on puns lumberjack_jeff Dec 2013 #16

Exactly! Demeter Dec 2013 #19

hah! penultimate Dec 2013 #30

I don't get it... sarisataka Dec 2013 #41

There are 10 kinds of people in the world Android3.14 Dec 2013 #7

No offense, but ... JEFF9K Dec 2013 #11

No offense, but that places you squarely in the "doesn't understand binary" category. Thor_MN Dec 2013 #20

In common usage, "binary" means there are only two choices. ... JEFF9K Dec 2013 #61

If the first and second definitions don't make sense, go with the one that makes it funny. Thor_MN Dec 2013 #63

This is a POLITICAL website. ... JEFF9K Dec 2013 #68

You didn't get the joke... And no amount of quibbling is going to change that. Thor_MN Dec 2013 #69

I understand binary. ... JEFF9K Dec 2013 #70

And yet you suggested 3 might be better. Thor_MN Dec 2013 #71

There going to kill me for clueing you in Springslips Dec 2013 #65

I don't understand why 3 would be funnier? hughee99 Dec 2013 #22

If you are still scratching your coconut, 10 in binary = 2 in the base 10 system. geckosfeet Dec 2013 #25

I'm not scratching my head at all. hughee99 Dec 2013 #28

I know - three does not work in any sense. Except the non-sense sense. geckosfeet Dec 2013 #46

Well that just Hz Android3.14 Dec 2013 #49

Mhz - if you can't take the butt hurt you be in the wrong place.... geckosfeet Dec 2013 #50

If you're going to consider non-sense to be humor hughee99 Dec 2013 #59

Good question. I suppose the answer is that it was the nature of the original "joke". geckosfeet Dec 2013 #67

But that would be 11 people and would ruin the joke. n/t hootinholler Dec 2013 #53

These wouldn't make it on late-night comedy ... JEFF9K Dec 2013 #8

Great! albino65 Dec 2013 #9

Good change of pace! randome Dec 2013 #10

A very attractive young English teacher walks into a tavern.... JohnnyRingo Dec 2013 #12

Four Engineers are in a car, the car breaks down Burma Jones Dec 2013 #14

nuk nuk nuk flamingdem Dec 2013 #17

What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar? Nevernose Dec 2013 #15

Payscales...depends on the industry Demeter Dec 2013 #21

Angele Merkel German joke flamingdem Dec 2013 #18

Best one here. :>)))))) pangaia Dec 2013 #29

teeeheee penultimate Dec 2013 #31

That's my new favorite. nt Codeine Dec 2013 #35

I came back to peruse thread and found your post!!!!! etherealtruth Dec 2013 #40

heh. +1 nt lumberjack_jeff Dec 2013 #55

DU Rec Tuesday Afternoon Dec 2013 #23

OK, here's one that is so inteleckshul you'll feint. ananda Dec 2013 #24

Descartes: The later years... pinboy3niner Dec 2013 #56

Welll.. I wanted to make one with Sarah Palin in it, so here's my pathetic attempt. ananda Dec 2013 #26

Rene Descartes walks into a bar. Ernest Partridge Dec 2013 #32

Thanks, JimboBillyBubbaBob Dec 2013 #33

What's red, hangs on the wall, and whistles? Major Nikon Dec 2013 #34

A software engineer is sent to the store by his wife... krispos42 Dec 2013 #36

Lol senseandsensibility Dec 2013 #37

Hahahaha NuclearDem Dec 2013 #43

Nice ones. Thx. Vattel Dec 2013 #38

Scooby Doo can doo-doo, but Jimmy Carter is smarter... Democracyinkind Dec 2013 #39

An old "Kiwi" friend of mine jazzimov Dec 2013 #42

Haha!! arcane1 Dec 2013 #52

An anthropologist walks into a bar and asks "Why is this joke funny?" NuclearDem Dec 2013 #45

The barman says: �We don�t serve faster-than-light particles here.� Junkdrawer Dec 2013 #47

If God were an Engineer... FarCenter Dec 2013 #48

Neil deGrasse Tyson uses a variant of this joke as an example of 'not so Intelligent Design'... DreamGypsy Dec 2013 #58

Why did the chicken cross the road? eridani Dec 2013 #51

I saw the word dumb and thought this was another Saran Palin thread n/t doc03 Dec 2013 #54

Intellectual light-bulb jokes Jim Lane Dec 2013 #57

Deep malaise Dec 2013 #60

Those jokes are bad and they should feel bad.... Blue_Tires Dec 2013 #62

A doctor, a lawyer and an engineer are playing golf... A HERETIC I AM Dec 2013 #64

Q: Why are quantum physicists such bad lovers? William Seger Dec 2013 #66