I have to go off on a rant about organ donation.

[Hoyt]

26. Agree Completely. Make sure family knows your wishes.

I agree completely, and am singed up as an organ donor.

I will relay my experience when my wife -- Jane -- passed away three years ago unexpectedly at home.

When I got home the organ donor agency called to ask my wishes. It was the nicest lady whose angelic voice I still remember. She explained that since Jane did not die in a hospital, some of the organs weren't useable -- heart, etc.

But, she said, they had a big need for other organs. I was fine when she asked about donating the cornea. Then, when she asked about all the skin off my wife's back and the "long bones of the legs," I had to ask her how long I had to think about that. I knew what I was likely to do, but just needed to think about it -- it had been a tough day. She said something like an hour, two at most, because they had to transfer her to several places to have those removed and prepared.

Anyway, I told the lady to call me back in 45 minutes. I thought about it and called a few of my wife's friends. They said they were sure Jane would want to do it. So, in 45 minutes I said OK.

Almost every month for a year, I received at least one nice letter from the donor organization -- I mean really nice letters that made me feel good about the whole thing. They also sent a few books about mourning the passing of a loved one. They even had counseling meetings I could attend and some kind of celebration for all those families who participated during that year. While I did not participate in those, I am sure it helped those who did.

Considering the circumstances, the donation part was a wonderful experience. I think some people truly benefited -- so, in a sense, Jane's life was meaningful even after death.

I never had a regret and have told those who will likely make those decisions for me to do the same.

I suspect it is even tougher for those who have to make the decision while their loved ones are still clinging to life. My thoughts are with them, and all those who make this choice.