General Discussion

duffyduff

(3,251 posts)

101. This was totally botched. A private meeting with the boy's parents, teacher, and

Reply to Ichingcarpenter (Original post)

Thu Dec 12, 2013, 02:06 PM

Dec 2013

administrator(s) would have been sufficient.

People are trying to make this into a huge "sexual harassment" case when in fact this is about appropriate boundaries.

It doesn't discriminate on the basis of sex, let me tell you.

Respect for boundaries also applies to bullying, to fighting, to name-calling, and so on down the line.

It's about respecting the rights of others.

It's especially a big issue with young children and older students who have moderate to severe disabilities. Try working in a classroom with these type of students. Hitting, spitting, throwing chairs and other furniture at fellow students and staff are commonplace. The girls can be just as violent as the boys.

Just teaching them the "three rules" of classroom behavior--be respectful, be responsible, be safe--is a full-time job in itself.

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School drops sexual harassment claim against 6-year-old [View all] Ichingcarpenter Dec 2013 OP

Indeed. Egalitarian Thug Dec 2013 #1

Sense or proportion is nil Puzzledtraveller Dec 2013 #57

shitty parent goes to media JI7 Dec 2013 #2

Huh? PuraVidaDreamin Dec 2013 #3

the kid's shitty mother went to media and lied and said the girl wanted it JI7 Dec 2013 #4

I agree with the School Board's decesion Ichingcarpenter Dec 2013 #5

I agree Dorian Gray Dec 2013 #13

I agree with that gollygee Dec 2013 #27

Shitty knee-jerk school adminisrators expsed as idiots. n/t 99Forever Dec 2013 #23

Idiot people forget about normal childhood development; IdaBriggs Dec 2013 #67

Post removed Post removed Dec 2013 #100

Never had I seen anything quite that 16th century malaise Dec 2013 #6

Just to be clear. The girls mother said it was repeated unwanted contact. whttevrr Dec 2013 #83

exactly. and the boy's mother needs to learn that her son is a liar...and he learned magical thyme Dec 2013 #97

Now that the mother let everyone know what happened, KitSileya Dec 2013 #7

You are comparing a kiss Bohunk68 Dec 2013 #8

So many here on DU don't want this kid punished for his behavior KitSileya Dec 2013 #10

Exactly. NuclearDem Dec 2013 #11

Lord in Heaven, 6 years olds are not capable of "sexual harassment"!!!! Bonobo Dec 2013 #9

As I have stated elsewhere, KitSileya Dec 2013 #12

It is NOT sexual harassment. Bonobo Dec 2013 #14

Why stop at mere harassment? Nuclear Unicorn Dec 2013 #16

it was documentation that went in a file. no more or less. no one would see. it was not following seabeyond Dec 2013 #55

Anything less just reinforces the patriarchal rape culture... Demo_Chris Dec 2013 #138

Sad Puzzledtraveller Dec 2013 #48

so EducatorInTraining Dec 2013 #61

he would be kissing the boy because he was boy, would he not? KitSileya Dec 2013 #72

6 year olds can't have sex. They have not gone through puberty. IdaBriggs Dec 2013 #66

that sounds like the kind of think a bureaucrat would say rdking647 Dec 2013 #80

Why the fear of calling his behavior for what it is? KitSileya Dec 2013 #82

the EEOC does not apply here Niceguy1 Dec 2013 #86

they did that. that failed. they talked to parents, that failed. so they took the next step and seabeyond Dec 2013 #89

How about a more generic term-bullying? TexasProgresive Dec 2013 #22

Sounds more reasonable to me. nt Bonobo Dec 2013 #25

butit wuld not have been, if that was the word chosen. there is a clear desire to make this seabeyond Dec 2013 #30

In all seriousness Bonobo Dec 2013 #34

they did not call the kid a sex offender. change the wording for your agenda. and no, not in all seabeyond Dec 2013 #38

Ooops, sorry. "Sexual harasser". Big difference. Bonobo Dec 2013 #45

so what? so the fuck what? putting he repeatedly kissed and touched a girl regardless of being told seabeyond Dec 2013 #60

I'm saying precisely one thing. Try to follow. Bonobo Dec 2013 #62

see... you want to narrowly focus to such a ridiculous point to be able to be outraged. seabeyond Dec 2013 #69

You have to wonder Puzzledtraveller Dec 2013 #51

i guess the flip side would be me wondering at the dismissal of a little girls school environment seabeyond Dec 2013 #58

Yes, they must be taught, lessons, taught, lessons, lessons, lessons, Puzzledtraveller Dec 2013 #59

omg. so, now we do not teach our kids? really. omg. are you a parent? to this day, i am still seabeyond Dec 2013 #63

Or we may simply let them do what they want, when they want, how they want and to whom they want. LanternWaste Dec 2013 #88

Problem: NO ONE ever said anything that could be interpreted said dismissal. Bonobo Dec 2013 #64

this whole fuckin thread is dismissal. not a person is saying, ya... something had to be addressed. seabeyond Dec 2013 #68

The kid wasn't arrested, much less charged with a sex offense. NuclearDem Dec 2013 #70

+1000 SomethingFishy Dec 2013 #91

"This is a boundaries and behavior issue" which the "man hating" group is discussing, whereas the seabeyond Dec 2013 #92

What have you been reading? gollygee Dec 2013 #94

To be fair, I've been frequently drawing rape culture into the discussion. NuclearDem Dec 2013 #110

Yeah boundaries are gollygee Dec 2013 #112

Which section is that? NuclearDem Dec 2013 #111

The unwanted attention can be dealt with gollygee Dec 2013 #17

There's an automatic tendency to think of sexual harassment KitSileya Dec 2013 #20

Wow! Yesterday you were equating this to "hitting." Now it's "killing"? lightcameron Dec 2013 #28

I am not equating it with killing. KitSileya Dec 2013 #35

It is exactly the same as arresting a 6 year old for making his finger into a gun and pointing it. Bonobo Dec 2013 #15

If the child had reached puberty Ichingcarpenter Dec 2013 #19

no arrest. no kid was arrested. it is not even kinda the same, let alone exactly seabeyond Dec 2013 #31

Yes, the mentality is precisely the same. nt Bonobo Dec 2013 #37

see. you said exactly the same as an arrest. it is not. so now you say mentality. it is not. seabeyond Dec 2013 #40

LOL Bonobo Dec 2013 #50

no. it is not an overreaction to tell the kid to quit kissing the girl. then to tell the parent seabeyond Dec 2013 #65

OK. You DON'T think calling him a sexual predator is an exaggeration. Got it. nt Bonobo Dec 2013 #74

again...false statement for agenda. nowhere was he called, referred to, or implied to be a sexual seabeyond Dec 2013 #84

What do YOU call someone who commits "sexual harassment", Sea? nt Bonobo Dec 2013 #85

Guess it depends if they do over and over again, regardless of being told not to, and regardless of LanternWaste Dec 2013 #90

Is that the only song you know? U4ikLefty Dec 2013 #137

This isn't the same as an arrest. The boy needs to be taught this behavior isn't okay. Dash87 Dec 2013 #93

Yes, he's a little predator... Lancero Dec 2013 #18

I wonder if the psychologist knew the full circumstances? KitSileya Dec 2013 #21

A kiss on the hand... Lancero Dec 2013 #24

He kissed her on the hand. This time. KitSileya Dec 2013 #26

"Unwanted history of behavior, such as roughhousing..." Lancero Dec 2013 #29

and this mentality would be you failing your child teaching him boundaries so he could be successful seabeyond Dec 2013 #36

Learning how to roughhouse without letting it reach the stage of a severe fight Bonobo Dec 2013 #43

not in school. there is a time and place and not in school. and girls, too, enjoy roughhousing. seabeyond Dec 2013 #49

Ha you and I posted the "time and place" thing at the same time n/t gollygee Dec 2013 #54

Of course in school. Bonobo Dec 2013 #56

whatever bonobo. you know, i am all over on this boys side. spending so much time in the system, seabeyond Dec 2013 #71

Yeah, whatever indeed. Bonobo Dec 2013 #76

You aren't accused of doing it. KitSileya Dec 2013 #75

So you would wait untila dog was full grown before teaching him not to bite? KitSileya Dec 2013 #41

Hardely. Lancero Dec 2013 #77

I don't see how working with his family KitSileya Dec 2013 #81

I think that's a "time and place" thing gollygee Dec 2013 #53

first step talking to and time out adn discussing with parent. next... in school detention seabeyond Dec 2013 #73

he is a kid whose parents refused to teach him boundaries. no more or less. nt seabeyond Dec 2013 #32

A kid... Lancero Dec 2013 #79

you have to fabricate an argument to be able to argue. i am well aware what is normal. many of my seabeyond Dec 2013 #87

It's ridiculous that a child this young was charged Penicilino Dec 2013 #33

Then it is good that he wasn't charged, then. KitSileya Dec 2013 #39

state the crime the child was charged with/ i anxiously await your answer so i can so fuckin' be on seabeyond Dec 2013 #44

Little boys have to learn they can't touch or kiss little girls if little girls say stop, or no. Demit Dec 2013 #42

It was obvious EducatorInTraining Dec 2013 #46

Good post, welcome to DU. Agschmid Dec 2013 #136

Yes, time to move on Capt. Obvious Dec 2013 #47

If my children were in this school 1awake Dec 2013 #52

Good. maddezmom Dec 2013 #78

Message auto-removed Name removed Dec 2013 #95

wow. you really did a back flip to push your agenda. first couple sentences tell me how anything seabeyond Dec 2013 #96

jury voted "boys who want to pretend to be girls" was within community standards. geek tragedy Dec 2013 #120

i personally thought it would be an easy hide seabeyond Dec 2013 #122

Note to Juror #2 gollygee Dec 2013 #123

You're not confused at all, but you are transparent. cyberswede Dec 2013 #98

You seem to grossly understate your confusion. uppityperson Dec 2013 #99

An apples-to-orange oversimplification. arcane1 Dec 2013 #104

Post removed Post removed Dec 2013 #113

Message auto-removed Name removed Dec 2013 #116

Ugh. nt geek tragedy Dec 2013 #118

This message was self-deleted by its author uppityperson Dec 2013 #127

MIRT nap. nt geek tragedy Dec 2013 #129

Without a hide, it can take a bit to pull the gang together to get banning done. Sure wish the post uppityperson Dec 2013 #131

LOL - and a new slang term is born! cyberswede Dec 2013 #135

Thank you MIRT! nt geek tragedy Dec 2013 #130

You're a lot more than "a little confused" n/t LadyHawkAZ Dec 2013 #114

A jury apparently voted 3-3 to keep this gollygee Dec 2013 #117

i posted it above. seabeyond Dec 2013 #124

Yeah I just saw it gollygee Dec 2013 #125

"wants to play dress up" gollygee Dec 2013 #119

he had me at "boys who want to pretend to be girls" nt geek tragedy Dec 2013 #126

Yep gollygee Dec 2013 #128

i stopped reading at the bathroom issue. nt seabeyond Dec 2013 #132

This was totally botched. A private meeting with the boy's parents, teacher, and duffyduff Dec 2013 #101

the school took a number of steps before reaching this point. the mother was not receptive. seabeyond Dec 2013 #106

The district botched it. Period. You don't take a draconian action like this and duffyduff Dec 2013 #108

i do nto agree. i do not agree it was draconian. they took the normal steps. talk, time out, seabeyond Dec 2013 #109

Sick & tired of the sexualizing of childhood, children, and childhood behavior. yodermon Dec 2013 #102

Glad to see sanity won out in Colorado 1000words Dec 2013 #103

Here at DU, however ... too many men believe it is merely.... boys will be boys seabeyond Dec 2013 #107

Time, actually past time, to teach this little boy historylovr Dec 2013 #105

Exactly right. Something is wrong when a little boy DevonRex Dec 2013 #115

Good. This never made much sense LittleBlue Dec 2013 #121

IMO, just drop the 'sex' part. Maybe have a district wide program on bullying. Rex Dec 2013 #133

Sexual harassment is a crime Calista241 Dec 2013 #134