28 Common Racist Attitudes And Behaviors

[gollygee]

59. White people are sensitive about the concept of white privilege

And I get that. First, it's hard to see. I could always see how I had class privilege, but I didn't see how things were much if at all easier for me than a person of color with the same money. But my eyes are now more open, although I think it's a constant learning exercise. But a friend of mine and my husband's was pulled over by the police for absolutely nothing, which we had a hard time understanding as we've never had that experience and have always found the police to be really nice. And my husband asked him, "Do you think it's because you're black?" And he said, "of COURSE it's because I'm black!" And then he told us about his driving experiences. His many driving experiences. This is a friend my husband met at his work, and they have parallel jobs, so the difference here is race, not money or what kind of car he's driving. In face, the friend wonders if driving a nice car when you're black makes things worse. And his experiences were so different from ours, and not just getting pulled over but how the police interacted with him, that we really saw the difference. If a police officer pulled me over for no reason and got mouthy with me, I'd flip out on him and feel entitled to do so, and he'd most likely come back with, "Oh, sorry ma'am" or something. But again, a totally different experience and sex of expectations.

And that's just one conversation from one friend who is a person of color. I've paid attention to other friends' and neighbors' experiences better as well so that I see how their experiences have differed from mine.

So once I saw it, I started noticing my privilege more and more. It's like the door was open and I started seeing it. And it's still a learning process, but I think keeping my eyes open to the world and my ears open to people of color and their experiences can help me understand what a big difference there is in experience. And I'm starting to try to educate myself better about our country's history because a lot of stuff, like how police treat people of various races, makes more sense in context of a complete understanding of US history. This is, like noticing privilege, a work in progress for me.

Then we're left with trying to figure out what to do with this knowledge of white privilege. Should I feel guilty for having entirely different experiences with police, for instance? But I don't feel guilt. I don't feel like I should feel guilt for stuff that happens outside of my control and I couldn't possibly stop no matter what. I just feel like the more I notice, the more I live differently in the world. Like I can notice if I'm being helped at a shop before someone else who was there first (and I'm a bit ADHD so this isn't necessarily something I would notice without being conscious of the potential. I don't pay attention to things well.) And if I were in a position to hire people or supervise people in a work setting, it could make a great deal of difference.

So for the people wondering what good it does to acknowledge white privilege, I'd say it's just about having your eyes open because I think it does make you notice things and therefore live differently, even in slight ways, that make the world a better place. If we all do it, it can make the world much happier and healthier.

I guess that's why the whole concept of "color blind" bothers me. I was "color blind" but really I was just blind - or I had a blind spot would be a better way of putting it. I feel like my job is to keep trying to reduce that blind spot.