Conan: Is Santa a Democrat or a Republican?

[jmowreader]

7. Santa is definitely a Republican

1. We know Santa pays his elves in-kind - food, shelter, clothes etc. in lieu of cash payment.

2. We also know Santa believes many laws don't apply to him - the fair labor standards act and the Federal Aviation Regulations come immediately to mind. He flies a non-type-approved aircraft without any instruments through IFR-only airspace.

3. Animal cruelty, thy name is forcing reindeer to fly 24 hours straight in subfreezing conditions.

4. Runs most intrusive espionage operation in history. Santa sees you when you're sleeping and knows when you're awake; the NSA only knows when you're in communication with someone.

5. Has evaded taxes for 400 years.

6. Santa gets his good rep from being a jolly old elf that hands out gifts to all the good girls and boys. Less well known is his habit of leaving lumps of coal in the stockings of children he deems bad.