This is how special interest evangelism fails (sexism)

[jollyreaper2112]

20. I don't absolve anyone

I sympathize with the side that's been wronged. In a system where the game's been rigged, my sympathies are with the underdog. But this doesn't mean that there can't be bad behavior from the underdog. Men can be real assholes. They can take advantage of social position and disparate income levels to really stick it to their ex-wives. But just because some men can be assholes, because some of the most visible cases that get media attention involve men being assholes, this doesn't mean women aren't also capable of being assholes. We have the case of the woman murdering her husband by shoving him off a cliff. Of course, we'll have many more cases of men murdering their wives. It's only natural for the asshole quotient to not reach parity in an unequal system.

As far as these discussions go, let's look at it like a judge at a custody hearing. The first question to be asked is whether both parents are on the same page, wanting what's best for the kids. Doesn't matter if they disagree on what's best, the important thing is that they want what's best. Hearts in the right place. We can have a reasonable talk. But if one parent wants to use the kids as a weapon against the other, then whatever that person has to say doesn't really have much bearing, now does it?

Strong advocates of a given point of view make easy targets. If you are also a fun target, then you will get trolled mercilessly. But it does become clear when there's no effort to resolve anything, when the topic is sheer trollbaiting.

I'm not a fan of MRA's. I've known some men who have gotten screwed in divorces but that doesn't mean I'm going to say all women are evil anymore than a Nigerian trying to scam me online means the whole country is full of crooks. MRA's are in that dangerous, slippery slope where reasonable people who have been legitimately wronged can hear a fellow sufferer in the propaganda and then get swept along to some very wrongheaded conclusions. Seductive wrongness is dangerous. I've also seen feminists who have gotten screwed in life and have turned a real issue into a platform for personal psychodrama. It's not really helpful. Am I saying all feminists are this way? No.