General Discussion

MADem

(135,425 posts)

23. If that wasn't posted on the "PUBLIC" setting at facebook, I'd just delete this thread.

Wed Dec 25, 2013, 02:44 AM

Dec 2013

What's the point of rehashing an individual's pain at such a vulnerable time? This is between "Tom" and "Jesse" and whomever, it's not really our business.

People often say things they don't really mean when under extreme stress. People can say things that sound horrible when others don't know the full context, too.

I think this thread is voyeuristic at best. I'm mainly posting in it so I don't get called to a jury on it in case someone decides to hit the button...it's just too sad and awful and personal.

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So one of my FB frenemies lost their mother today, and this is what he said about her [View all] LaydeeBug Dec 2013 OP

I wouldn't respond BainsBane Dec 2013 #1

I wouldn't respond. elleng Dec 2013 #2

I am so sorry to hear of this elleng. You certainly deserved better, or your familiarity should have LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #21

Surely didn't happen to me, LaydeeBug. elleng Dec 2013 #73

I'm not sure that being horribly abused has any connection to political inclinations. aikoaiko Dec 2013 #3

It gives insight into his spitefulness. Some who suffer thrive on inflicting suffering LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #5

I think its sad NoOneMan Dec 2013 #7

That goes to the heart of it. People who are hateful are often in pain. Instead of being liberal_at_heart Dec 2013 #8

Thank you. Jamastiene Dec 2013 #48

THIS. Me too. I want him to know that should never have happened to him and he deserved to be loved LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #19

Even if you walk a mile in his shoes, & you apparently haven't, you're still not qualified to judge. WillowTree Dec 2013 #14

Why are you saying that I am judging him? Seriously! I am not. thanks. nt LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #17

Your repeated references to his "spitefulness" say otherwise. WillowTree Dec 2013 #22

Oh he is very, very spiteful, and celebrates that fact, so, um…no LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #25

Wishing you some peace of your own. Merry Christmas! WillowTree Dec 2013 #27

Thank you for that, I wish peace for you as well. Happy Holidays. nt LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #28

Here is what I said: LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #26

I've no sympathy for him. I was the product of an abusive childhood. I am ultra liberal Katashi_itto Dec 2013 #41

I understand. WillowTree Dec 2013 #51

Whatever snark you like Katashi_itto Dec 2013 #75

I would not reply to that. Tuesday Afternoon Dec 2013 #4

You're judging somebody for not grieving his abuser in a way you approve of? LeftyMom Dec 2013 #6

Spare me your fucking sanctimony since they posted it in a MUCH HEAVIER trafficked website, LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #10

Oh trust me, I'm judging the shit out of you. LeftyMom Dec 2013 #12

Judge not lest ye be judged. I noticed you wrongly referred to them as my relative…not surprising LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #15

Wish him peace and be done with it... countryjake Dec 2013 #9

That's exactly what i did. I told him he was a survivor... LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #11

i don't get what this has to do with politics , i'm sure there are abused people on both sides JI7 Dec 2013 #13

As I said upthread, it gives insight into his spitefulness. LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #16

not really, even on DU there have been similar comments from people with abusive parents JI7 Dec 2013 #18

I hadn't noticed that at all. But I try to take each thread that I read as it comes, and rarely LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #20

If that wasn't posted on the "PUBLIC" setting at facebook, I'd just delete this thread. MADem Dec 2013 #23

No shit. It's now searchable on Google. Really inappropriate. PeaceNikki Dec 2013 #36

Agree, this should be deleted. tammywammy Dec 2013 #45

This seems to be a rather maliscious OP cthulu2016 Dec 2013 #24

starting with "FB frenemies" Skittles Dec 2013 #29

It's not. nt LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #37

I disagree. It's totally inappropriate to copy and paste this person's words here. PeaceNikki Dec 2013 #40

I disagree with that altogether. I also find it off-putting that you don't know what I'm trying to LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #46

You could have paraphrased or summarized the discussion. To C&P is terribly rude. PeaceNikki Dec 2013 #47

and no political slant -just someones pain not worked out for so many years >Maybe now after death lunasun Dec 2013 #68

"Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way." ~ Leo Tolstoy . . . Journeyman Dec 2013 #30

LaydeeBug, please don't be offeneded... joshcryer Dec 2013 #31

I am not offended joshcryer, and I hope you won't be that I disagree with you LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #35

Joshcryer is correct - TBF Dec 2013 #52

Was the writer a step-sibling of yours? pnwmom Dec 2013 #32

If it's a "frenemy" a supportive response could be more painful. joshcryer Dec 2013 #33

Thank you for this post…Upthread I've included my response more than once, so I won't post LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #34

May he know peace now that his abuser has passed... cherokeeprogressive Dec 2013 #38

He responded. Thank GOD it wasn't misconstrued LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #42

What are you asking for? Sheldon Cooper Dec 2013 #39

I am not asking for anything now. I already responded. I won't ignore something because it's 'messy' LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #43

Failing to forgive an abuser isn't spiteful. Codeine Dec 2013 #44

Oh I agree with you, but he is indeed, and in fact, very spiteful…like single mothers should have LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #49

You came here for LEVITY? Levity? You wanted to make light of or poke fun of someone in pain? PeaceNikki Dec 2013 #57

**Never** did I fucking say I wanted to make light or poke fun at him NEVER, but YOUR projection LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #58

Go look up the definition of "levity" and get back to me. PeaceNikki Dec 2013 #61

Go look up context and get back to me. LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #62

ooooooooo, buuuuuuurn PeaceNikki Dec 2013 #64

People who claim the moral high ground should not be standing on a heap of bullshit when they do it. LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #67

Well, that's even more disgusting. C&P'ing his words of pain to make yourself feel better? PeaceNikki Dec 2013 #70

Odd that he's a tea bagger in that he doesn't seem to treestar Dec 2013 #50

OMG! Thank you!!! This is what I thought too…and I don't know how the father was 'stolen' LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #66

By divorcing their father to marry the new husband, and presumably making sure the tblue37 Dec 2013 #85

Question: what are we supposed to pull out of this guys post that applies to teabagger insight ? karadax Dec 2013 #53

This has none to do with political views. nadinbrzezinski Dec 2013 #54

Not to mention taking a private TBF Dec 2013 #56

It was on FB, so not necessarily private nadinbrzezinski Dec 2013 #59

Exactly. nt TBF Dec 2013 #69

How I wish you would have read the thread before jumping to conclusions LaydeeBug Dec 2013 #60

Yup, others are telling you essentially the same. nadinbrzezinski Dec 2013 #65

I don't see how person's political leanings are relevant in this case penultimate Dec 2013 #55

I think bringing his pain here for strangers to unpack is gross. Brickbat Dec 2013 #63

Who needs enemies with frenemies like this????????? lunasun Dec 2013 #71

I'm surprised this is still up. Tacky. n/t tammywammy Dec 2013 #72

this doe not show insight into a teabagger. magical thyme Dec 2013 #74

I don't know. BlueStreak Dec 2013 #78

The best response would be to delete your OP. winter is coming Dec 2013 #76

i do not know what kind of mom she was. i do not know what he endured. i know nothing. seabeyond Dec 2013 #77

I have read posts from people here saying similar things about one or both parents.... ProudToBeBlueInRhody Dec 2013 #79

Sharing that is incredibly tacky. WorseBeforeBetter Dec 2013 #80

Interesting thread AuntPatsy Dec 2013 #81

Two thoughts OmahaBlueDog Dec 2013 #82

Low. Unrec. 840high Dec 2013 #83

His pain. His rage. His grief. Iggo Dec 2013 #84