General Discussion

sir pball

(5,340 posts)

21. Hmm. Here's what I think, I've pondered OP'ing it but I honestly don't have time to deal with that.

Sun Dec 29, 2013, 12:48 AM

Dec 2013

I mean, being able to interact and involve myself in a potentially high-response post...I have trysts with DU but never got to the point where I'd start a major discussion. Anyway...

I was always raised to respect women as equal humans. Never had any gender bias whatsoever...actually, my mom was the Obie with the SCSW/Columbia dual-masters breadwinner while my dad indulged his art, making OK money but certainly not enough to support a family of 4; for almost my entire childhood it was the female paying the bills, getting us healthcare, basically providing for the family.

That being said, women are unspeakably desirable...but it's not my right as A Man to have them, quite the opposite. It's their right as A Woman to bless me with whatever rewards they choose based on what I can offer in return...at its simplest, a gender-equal yet gender-based transaction. Maybe money or goods or maybe just some satisfying skills. I think that's the lynchpin of third-wave feminism and one of the reasons it's maybe not ready for primetime; strippers and hookers and porn stars are using their leverage in possessing that which us men admittedly want to pressure us into bargaining, instead of demanding. I think guys throwing money at a girl for a flash of nipple is (besides rather pathetic) somewhat revolutionary - even today in quite a bit of the world he could legally just rip her top off. Ditto casual sex. I've done it, and it's been great fun, and it's all revolved around how well we can mutually physically please each other. Yeah, alcohol was involved, but I was in no more shape to consent than she was and more than once she took the initiative. Now that there's a future Mrs. Pball the dynamic is a little different, sure...but I wouldn't be happy with random girls groping me, either. Look up "implied consent" sometime, we both got our licenses with each other.

Basically...girls are fuckin' hot and I want all the sex!
..but I have to act in such a way that makes them want to have all the sex with me, because they have an incontrovertible human right to freely consent, or deny. Their bodies are no more mine than any man's.

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I refuse to apologize for being male [View all] Harmony Blue Dec 2013 OP

Who asked you to apologize for being male? Cali_Democrat Dec 2013 #1

The imaginary shrill feminists who live in his head. LeftyMom Dec 2013 #3

Indeed, men and straw-men living together! Oh no! arcane1 Dec 2013 #12

Is this a sign of repressed guilt from a prior behaviors? n/t TheBlackAdder Dec 2013 #68

Nobody. Iggo Dec 2013 #175

"Link, please?" nomorenomore08 Dec 2013 #200

"If there is please provide a link" NoOneMan Dec 2013 #2

Not much on DU RobertEarl Dec 2013 #4

good. do NOT apologize for being male. that would be so wrong. seabeyond Dec 2013 #5

Yes, no one should apologize for how they were born NoOneMan Dec 2013 #8

nope. seabeyond Dec 2013 #9

Nice to agree on something! NoOneMan Dec 2013 #181

The threads were dying down and you know how some people cannot let go Rex Dec 2013 #208

omg. the DU gender wars rage on. Liberal_in_LA Dec 2013 #6

Trash thread. Vashta Nerada Dec 2013 #7

"Can't we make a forum for these types of posts?" NoOneMan Dec 2013 #10

That would be for the best, I think. [nt] Jester Messiah Dec 2013 #111

Gosh, only one video to make hurt male feefees Starry Messenger Dec 2013 #11

ya know. nt seabeyond Dec 2013 #13

Ain't that something? BainsBane Dec 2013 #20

What video? Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #121

"Feefee" is slang for "feelings". nt Jamaal510 Dec 2013 #189

Thanks Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #193

This^^^^^^ treestar Dec 2013 #132

I am not going to apoligize for something I have done nothing wrong for Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #141

who asked you to? Whisp Dec 2013 #14

No one asked you to. NuclearDem Dec 2013 #15

First provide a link to anyone asking you to apologize for being a male. JaneyVee Dec 2013 #16

:) polichick Dec 2013 #173

Women aren't going to apologize for LumosMaxima Dec 2013 #17

Is DU somehow immune to rape culture? BainsBane Dec 2013 #18

An exerpt... rrneck Dec 2013 #19

In other words it means whatever who is claiming it wants it to mean Major Nikon Dec 2013 #84

Yep. nt rrneck Dec 2013 #98

That's pretty much what I've always thought. NaturalHigh Dec 2013 #109

There is some interesting information that I will have to sit down and read Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #143

How about refusing to excuse maleness? sir pball Dec 2013 #26

I want sex too BainsBane Dec 2013 #29

Because, well, see my direct response sir pball Dec 2013 #33

I see BainsBane Dec 2013 #36

Oh...The Future Mrs. loves and adores, well.. (don't read if you're delicate) sir pball Dec 2013 #40

It's also your choice BainsBane Dec 2013 #45

Oh, of course. sir pball Dec 2013 #50

Pure bullshit Boudica the Lyoness Dec 2013 #127

Next time try reading what I actually write BainsBane Dec 2013 #142

what a bullshit post. lol. you may not want sex, but please do not assign that to all of us. seabeyond Dec 2013 #145

Good post Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #146

It is a currency, sir pall... MrMickeysMom Dec 2013 #95

Well, yeah. sir pball Dec 2013 #96

You associate singular viewvpoints as a collective? Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #148

Multiple people engage in its perpetuation BainsBane Dec 2013 #150

A collective has to be organized cohessively Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #158

You obviously have no idea what the word culture means BainsBane Dec 2013 #169

Here is the defintion of culture Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #183

Rape culture fits within your third definition kwassa Dec 2013 #190

Then provide a link Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #192

"There is more sexism here than in the broader community." Really? Comrade Grumpy Dec 2013 #160

Yeah DU is like an oasis Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #199

Hmm. Here's what I think, I've pondered OP'ing it but I honestly don't have time to deal with that. sir pball Dec 2013 #21

do women, one way or another, always have to be "selling" sex instead of just simply getting, along seabeyond Dec 2013 #23

Of course not, one way or the other. Poor choice of words. sir pball Dec 2013 #30

here we go. seabeyond Dec 2013 #55

Oy vey. I'm deliberately coming at this from one direction but here goes sir pball Dec 2013 #64

ok. i think the simpler would have been your original first two paragraphs then a simple seabeyond Dec 2013 #70

I did get overly complicated, yeah sir pball Dec 2013 #72

assuming boundaries are respected... seabeyond Dec 2013 #74

Of course. sir pball Dec 2013 #78

this assessment is really pitiful Skittles Dec 2013 #28

So sex isn't fun? sir pball Dec 2013 #31

ugh Skittles Dec 2013 #32

*chuckles* never should have mentioned third-wave. sir pball Dec 2013 #37

The concept of a male having an "enlightened attitude" is beyond the immagination of a number Katashi_itto Dec 2013 #73

No - it was the gender stereotypes embeddeded in at least two descriptions Ms. Toad Dec 2013 #97

So by acknowledging, and even insisting, that a woman has a choice... TroglodyteScholar Dec 2013 #105

No. What he said was that it was his responsibility to Ms. Toad Dec 2013 #115

Perfect. Thank you. nt xulamaude Dec 2013 #139

And another one bites the dust, Soundman Dec 2013 #119

lol. our simple disagreeing, which you advocate the right, allows you to then say we seabeyond Dec 2013 #155

Not what I am saying at all. Soundman Dec 2013 #170

lol. too many are really all over dismissing what i say with transparency page. very transparent. seabeyond Dec 2013 #171

Hard to say, Soundman Dec 2013 #172

soundman.... seabeyond Dec 2013 #177

Thank you Soundman Dec 2013 #179

This message was self-deleted by its author seabeyond Dec 2013 #77

LOL... trumad Dec 2013 #117

i am so glad to hear that. the portrayal of who a woman is, is as foreign to me, as the seabeyond Dec 2013 #157

Are you not man enough? RobertEarl Dec 2013 #22

This message was self-deleted by its author one_voice Dec 2013 #24

Instead of towing a line that is perpetuated without solid basis lets examine what culture is first Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #124

Hey, don't strain yourself RobertEarl Dec 2013 #214

Could you apologize for being intentionally dense, then? Scootaloo Dec 2013 #25

+1 Egalitarian Thug Dec 2013 #213

I just don't get male defensiveness at all pinboy3niner Dec 2013 #27

It's reactionary RobertEarl Dec 2013 #35

It doesn't take much for some to feel attacked either BainsBane Dec 2013 #49

Entitlement RobertEarl Dec 2013 #51

You'd be even more amazed BainsBane Dec 2013 #54

I struggle mightily to find what is supposed to be offensive there Scootaloo Dec 2013 #83

Thank you. Ms. Toad Dec 2013 #99

Wow, that is so well-stated Scootaloo. I totally agree. I just don't see the problem here. Vattel Dec 2013 #114

It's the mirror. PassingFair Dec 2013 #152

And it turned into the feminists of DU hate men. It's still being discussed how awful we are. kcr Dec 2013 #101

I looked in that thread briefly BainsBane Dec 2013 #104

I honestly don't know how this video sparked such howls of persecution. myrna minx Dec 2013 #113

Great video, thanks. Nika Dec 2013 #212

It is not a challenge to masculinity Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #153

"Some DU women are quite effective at rubbing men's faces in the dirt." NoOneMan Dec 2013 #180

I'm gay... Just putting that out there. Agschmid Dec 2013 #34

I'm not gay, but we seem to be in the same boat pinboy3niner Dec 2013 #38

I'm straight... one_voice Dec 2013 #39

totally agree DustyJoe Dec 2013 #133

Oh, I've seen how you degenerates behave! sir pball Dec 2013 #41

Yah well we certainly queen it up sometimes... Agschmid Dec 2013 #42

In all seriousness, it must be nice sir pball Dec 2013 #46

No there certainly are... Agschmid Dec 2013 #56

I know, but with the weather in this discussion sir pball Dec 2013 #67

Oh sorry... I get all holier than Francis sometimes! Agschmid Dec 2013 #81

are you a woman ? because many of these issues affect lgbt women also JI7 Dec 2013 #43

Only on Thursday nights at tilt. Agschmid Dec 2013 #44

Heh! pinboy3niner Dec 2013 #47

lol lol seabeyond Dec 2013 #63

you know what they say BainsBane Dec 2013 #76

I'm sure I'll regret this later when someone uses it for DU blackmail... Agschmid Dec 2013 #80

Awesome! BainsBane Dec 2013 #82

Wigs make anything possible. Agschmid Dec 2013 #88

Simply gorgeous! In_The_Wind Dec 2013 #90

that is fun Agschmid seabeyond Dec 2013 #92

I used the blur effectively, better than any anti aging lotion! Agschmid Dec 2013 #93

Gorgeous! cinnabonbon Dec 2013 #106

Agreed! Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #197

cheesecake! bench scientist Dec 2013 #211

Oh fer fucksake alcibiades_mystery Dec 2013 #48

My sentiments exactly. TDale313 Dec 2013 #53

While I consider it a foregone conclusion that no one should need to apologize... Shandris Dec 2013 #52

Too bad no one is MODERATING it Matariki Dec 2013 #57

Or they are reticent to touch it for some reason. Shandris Dec 2013 #58

It would be helpful if you felt an OP did not meet the SOP that you'd alert. Agschmid Dec 2013 #71

Yup. Agschmid Dec 2013 #62

But at least the Home Depot thread was locked right away kcr Dec 2013 #66

You don't have to. Raine1967 Dec 2013 #59

+1 demmiblue Dec 2013 #61

+1000 smirkymonkey Dec 2013 #116

+ 1,000,000 nomorenomore08 Dec 2013 #201

Okay. Deep13 Dec 2013 #60

Hit and run shit stirring - nt Ohio Joe Dec 2013 #65

This thread most likely has your example... Agschmid Dec 2013 #69

Wow. That thread is pretty unbelievable. Ms. Toad Dec 2013 #102

Nope he's gone for good I believe. Agschmid Dec 2013 #123

There were references in the thread Ms. Toad Dec 2013 #184

Ok, to restate my other post - SEX IS FUN sir pball Dec 2013 #75

Juror 5 wins... Another reason late night juries (and Pat Benetar) rule... Agschmid Dec 2013 #85

That's the first jury I know I've survived. sir pball Dec 2013 #86

. Agschmid Dec 2013 #87

I wouldn't say "highly". sir pball Dec 2013 #89

2nd jimlup Dec 2013 #79

Not only do I refuse to apologize, but I am very happy to be a man. quinnox Dec 2013 #91

I refuse not to put you on full ignore ZRT2209 Dec 2013 #94

Believe it or not Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #203

A link to a culture? How? intaglio Dec 2013 #100

How about some links. Honestly. DanTex Dec 2013 #136

I am waiting for the proof that Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #154

I've certainly seen posts which, at the very least, edged toward those sentiments. nomorenomore08 Dec 2013 #202

Can't you guys keep these asinine posts in the mens group and history of feminism? last1standing Dec 2013 #103

I wrote this for someone else, I think that you can use it too... MrScorpio Dec 2013 #107

I hear you... NaturalHigh Dec 2013 #108

Not to single out anyone (against DU rules) Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #130

Oh good gravy - this is like Christians wailing about persecution myrna minx Dec 2013 #110

At what point were you asked to apologize? etherealtruth Dec 2013 #112

Start a flame thread---check trumad Dec 2013 #118

How are you still posting with 8 locked posts in the last 90 days? n-t Logical Dec 2013 #128

Why are you obsessed with my transparency sheet. trumad Dec 2013 #129

No, just wondering how you can get away with be so disruptive. I thought the rules changed. nt Logical Dec 2013 #131

I posted about an obvious hit and run thread in that Op trumad Dec 2013 #134

LOL, looked at your profile to see what your deal was. Said 0% on the jury. Simple. Make sense now? Logical Dec 2013 #135

From what I can see, both of you have been acting pretty weird lately. n/t ChisolmTrailDem Dec 2013 #137

Weird--- trumad Dec 2013 #151

I agree you are. Getting that many posted locked is unusual. Temper issues. n-t Logical Dec 2013 #162

No---douchebag issues. trumad Dec 2013 #163

Hey! How the hell are you getting away xulamaude Dec 2013 #164

You are weird and a douchebag? Wow, at least you admit it. n-t Logical Dec 2013 #167

I'm the first to admit that... trumad Dec 2013 #174

I don't think they get posting privileges suspended until Jan 7 or 8. NaturalHigh Dec 2013 #138

I did not know this beccause I thought it was in effect already Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #198

Were you asked to apologize? If so, I haven't seen any MineralMan Dec 2013 #120

You can be whatever you want to be in cyberspace marshall Dec 2013 #122

This is true Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #194

LOL, dramatic much? n-t Logical Dec 2013 #125

please provide a link for anyone on DU demanding you apologize for your gender. cali Dec 2013 #126

I just got a ridiculous hide, quinnox Dec 2013 #140

Yeah, I got a ridiculous hide yesterday as well. Vashta Nerada Dec 2013 #144

We obviously have a small group who are furiously using the alert button on any duers whom quinnox Dec 2013 #147

prove it. oh wait, you cannot. just an unprovoked attack on fellow duers. seabeyond Dec 2013 #168

SOLIDARITY, BROTHER! pinboy3niner Dec 2013 #149

Hi sign! Iggo Dec 2013 #206

Way to take a stand, bro. Impressive. Brickbat Dec 2013 #156

Thank you Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #159

. Brickbat Dec 2013 #161

i love will. the is a purity in his expression. blunt, straight, sincere. so cute. nt seabeyond Dec 2013 #166

I'm blue-eyed and left-handed, I'm pissed off, and I vote!!! DisgustipatedinCA Dec 2013 #165

I thought that we eradicated you lefty swine decades ago Orrex Dec 2013 #188

Jeez. Iggo Dec 2013 #176

lol... seabeyond Dec 2013 #178

Refusing to apologize for being white when no one asked them to is a central tenet JoeyT Dec 2013 #182

Yes I am white, male and christian Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #186

What about "no one asked you to apologize" didn't you get? You're still going with the same nomorenomore08 Dec 2013 #205

Whoosh! JoeyT Dec 2013 #210

I'm glad I don't live in the vicinity of any MREs... cherokeeprogressive Dec 2013 #191

Damn right. Bobbie Jo Dec 2013 #185

my son told me he was feelin' his manhood being challenged. seabeyond Dec 2013 #187

Is that your stripper name? itsrobert Dec 2013 #195

Actually no Harmony Blue Dec 2013 #204

And the jury allows personal attacks like this to stand darkangel218 Dec 2013 #209

No one asked you to. YoungDemCA Dec 2013 #196

Yes it is important for you to make a scene, the topic was dying down. Rex Dec 2013 #207