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Showing Original Post only (View all)'I Can't Be Gay In North East Louisiana.' A ULM Student's Powerful Message To Phil Robertson [View all]
I CANT BE GAY IN NORTHEAST LOUISIANA. A ULM STUDENTS POWERFUL MESSAGE TO PHIL ROBERTSON
By Anonymous
Bob Mann recently wrote a post from the perspective of a young lesbian girl that really painted an accurate picture of LGBTQ life in Ouachita Parish. But I couldnt share it on my Facebook.
It was too gay.
Its fine for you to stand up for the queers, my grandparents will say, but God help you if youre one of them.
I am, it appears to be, the last gay man still in the closet to his family. Thats why this post is anonymous. Thats why my sexual orientation is blank on Facebook. Thats why I use gender-neutral pronouns when talking about my significant other.
I cant be gay in Northeast Louisiana. I came out to my parents, and theyve shoved me back into the closet.
The family isnt ready to hear that, they said.
The family isnt ready. Well, I suppose in all fairness it did take some getting used to myself.
I live in West Monroe, and Im a Mass Communications student at the University of Louisiana at Monroe (ULM). I moved here because its more progressive than my hometown, also in Northeast Louisiana. I mean, it has two gay bars. Look out San Francisco.
But West Monroe is also home to the most famous anti-gay person in the world: Phil Robertson. Ive never met Phil. But I was raised by a Phil Robertson.
My Phil Robertson told me that I was an asshole for being so selfish to come out of the closet to my mother.
My Phil Robertson told me that my boyfriend will never be welcomed to his house, as if he were diseased.
My Phil Robertson threatened my life because I had the audacity to be who I am.
Im 21 now. I first realized I was gay when I was 13. Ive known that I liked boys since I was eight. And I will never forget the day that I decided I wasnt going to be gay.
I was in Sunday school, and Id been daydreaming about moving off to San Francisco, because my dad had told me it was full of faggots. It sounded like the place for me.
Then it came to be my turn to read the Bible. And I read the verse aloud.
Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.
That didnt quite click with me, so I asked what it meant. And my Sunday school teacher said, It means that being gay is a sin. I felt sick. It was fine if my dad hated gays, but now God does, too?
My future caved in around dreams of sunny California and San Francisco, until all I could see were the fires in the pit of hell.
I was 13 years old.
So, I became straight because I didnt want to go to hell, and any time I strayed from the path of heterosexuality, I prayed to God to heal me of my sickness. And, then, after a while, I still liked boys. So, I prayed harder. I prayed more. I cried. Until eventually, I stopped believing in God altogether.
If there was a God, surely he heard my prayers. So, he either is wanting me to be a sinner or he doesnt exist. Either way, its not a god I wish to believe in.
I was 16 when I lost my faith. I was also 16 when I met my first boyfriend. It was like being James Bond in Podunk, Louisiana. Wed sneak off to the soybean fields just so we could be together. It was all a magical experience of holding hands under blankets and secret signals for I love you. Ah, to be 16 again.
I had my first kiss, my first time and my first heartbreak. I was being the most abnormal person in school, but I was finally living what I thought was a normal life. I was being me. Even though me involved leading a double life.
Long story-short: I regained my faith. In fact, Ive been considering becoming a minister. I am very much still a gay man. And I believe God has called me to minister to other gay people to let them know that God loves them just the way they are. Im to undo the hurt caused by the Churchthe same hurt caused to me.
Gay people, more often than not, throw the baby out with the bath water when it comes to religion. But we have a good reason. Weve been scarred. Religion has damaged us. And I try to share with them the light I have seen in the Episcopal Church. But every time I get close to a breakthrough, something happens that brings out the worst in people.
One year it was Chick-fil-a. This year its Phil Robertson.
Thanks to Phil, I now know where everyone in my family stands on the issue of whether or not Im a human being.
I even saw a friend of mine post something about how gay people cant be Christians. Wow. Not only will they keep us from having equal rights, but theyll keep us from equal salvation. We cant just be second-class citizens. We have second-class souls.
I drive through town, much like the girl in Bobs story, and I see everyone talking about how right Phil is. How they have Christian values by excluding about 15 percent of the population from their religion.
Phil claims to love everyone, and I have to believe that he has the best of intentions for saying what he said. But he must realize the damage that those words do to people like me.
He encouraged hopefully unintentionally a two-week-long fag bashing in Monroe and around the world. He made me feel unsafe in my own home. I cant count how many times I heard faggot over the Christmas visit home.
All of this is in a state that still has laws against, and still arrests people for, having homosexual relations.
I remember hearing about Matthew Sheppard. I remember learning about Harvey Milk. Ive never been under any impression that northeast Louisiana is safe for gays.
And people say Phil is being persecuted for his beliefs.
You dont know persecution until youre a 12-year-old boy sitting in a church pew when your preacher encourages everyone to vote to make gay marriage illegal because they think you dont deserve the same joy of raising a family due to your depravity.
You dont know persecution until youre told that God doesnt love you because of how He made you; when Christian fundamentalists are tied up to the back of pick-ups and dragged down a back road because they believe the Bible. When you know that, then you can talk about persecution.
I try really hard to not get angry over this. But its hard for me not to see red when I think about my grandparents, whom I love, who will never be able to be a part of my life because of their own ignorance. I doubt my parents come to my wedding one day. All because my love is different than their love.
But my love isnt different. It isnt unholy. It isnt wrong because a man with a beard said so in a GQ article.
My love is real. And its not going away.
Bob Mann recently wrote a post from the perspective of a young lesbian girl that really painted an accurate picture of LGBTQ life in Ouachita Parish. But I couldnt share it on my Facebook.
It was too gay.
Its fine for you to stand up for the queers, my grandparents will say, but God help you if youre one of them.
I am, it appears to be, the last gay man still in the closet to his family. Thats why this post is anonymous. Thats why my sexual orientation is blank on Facebook. Thats why I use gender-neutral pronouns when talking about my significant other.
I cant be gay in Northeast Louisiana. I came out to my parents, and theyve shoved me back into the closet.
The family isnt ready to hear that, they said.
The family isnt ready. Well, I suppose in all fairness it did take some getting used to myself.
I live in West Monroe, and Im a Mass Communications student at the University of Louisiana at Monroe (ULM). I moved here because its more progressive than my hometown, also in Northeast Louisiana. I mean, it has two gay bars. Look out San Francisco.
But West Monroe is also home to the most famous anti-gay person in the world: Phil Robertson. Ive never met Phil. But I was raised by a Phil Robertson.
My Phil Robertson told me that I was an asshole for being so selfish to come out of the closet to my mother.
My Phil Robertson told me that my boyfriend will never be welcomed to his house, as if he were diseased.
My Phil Robertson threatened my life because I had the audacity to be who I am.
Im 21 now. I first realized I was gay when I was 13. Ive known that I liked boys since I was eight. And I will never forget the day that I decided I wasnt going to be gay.
I was in Sunday school, and Id been daydreaming about moving off to San Francisco, because my dad had told me it was full of faggots. It sounded like the place for me.
Then it came to be my turn to read the Bible. And I read the verse aloud.
Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.
That didnt quite click with me, so I asked what it meant. And my Sunday school teacher said, It means that being gay is a sin. I felt sick. It was fine if my dad hated gays, but now God does, too?
My future caved in around dreams of sunny California and San Francisco, until all I could see were the fires in the pit of hell.
I was 13 years old.
So, I became straight because I didnt want to go to hell, and any time I strayed from the path of heterosexuality, I prayed to God to heal me of my sickness. And, then, after a while, I still liked boys. So, I prayed harder. I prayed more. I cried. Until eventually, I stopped believing in God altogether.
If there was a God, surely he heard my prayers. So, he either is wanting me to be a sinner or he doesnt exist. Either way, its not a god I wish to believe in.
I was 16 when I lost my faith. I was also 16 when I met my first boyfriend. It was like being James Bond in Podunk, Louisiana. Wed sneak off to the soybean fields just so we could be together. It was all a magical experience of holding hands under blankets and secret signals for I love you. Ah, to be 16 again.
I had my first kiss, my first time and my first heartbreak. I was being the most abnormal person in school, but I was finally living what I thought was a normal life. I was being me. Even though me involved leading a double life.
Long story-short: I regained my faith. In fact, Ive been considering becoming a minister. I am very much still a gay man. And I believe God has called me to minister to other gay people to let them know that God loves them just the way they are. Im to undo the hurt caused by the Churchthe same hurt caused to me.
Gay people, more often than not, throw the baby out with the bath water when it comes to religion. But we have a good reason. Weve been scarred. Religion has damaged us. And I try to share with them the light I have seen in the Episcopal Church. But every time I get close to a breakthrough, something happens that brings out the worst in people.
One year it was Chick-fil-a. This year its Phil Robertson.
Thanks to Phil, I now know where everyone in my family stands on the issue of whether or not Im a human being.
I even saw a friend of mine post something about how gay people cant be Christians. Wow. Not only will they keep us from having equal rights, but theyll keep us from equal salvation. We cant just be second-class citizens. We have second-class souls.
I drive through town, much like the girl in Bobs story, and I see everyone talking about how right Phil is. How they have Christian values by excluding about 15 percent of the population from their religion.
Phil claims to love everyone, and I have to believe that he has the best of intentions for saying what he said. But he must realize the damage that those words do to people like me.
He encouraged hopefully unintentionally a two-week-long fag bashing in Monroe and around the world. He made me feel unsafe in my own home. I cant count how many times I heard faggot over the Christmas visit home.
All of this is in a state that still has laws against, and still arrests people for, having homosexual relations.
I remember hearing about Matthew Sheppard. I remember learning about Harvey Milk. Ive never been under any impression that northeast Louisiana is safe for gays.
And people say Phil is being persecuted for his beliefs.
You dont know persecution until youre a 12-year-old boy sitting in a church pew when your preacher encourages everyone to vote to make gay marriage illegal because they think you dont deserve the same joy of raising a family due to your depravity.
You dont know persecution until youre told that God doesnt love you because of how He made you; when Christian fundamentalists are tied up to the back of pick-ups and dragged down a back road because they believe the Bible. When you know that, then you can talk about persecution.
I try really hard to not get angry over this. But its hard for me not to see red when I think about my grandparents, whom I love, who will never be able to be a part of my life because of their own ignorance. I doubt my parents come to my wedding one day. All because my love is different than their love.
But my love isnt different. It isnt unholy. It isnt wrong because a man with a beard said so in a GQ article.
My love is real. And its not going away.
http://bobmannblog.com/2013/12/28/i-cant-be-gay-in-northeast-louisiana-a-ulm-students-powerful-message-to-phil-robertson/
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'I Can't Be Gay In North East Louisiana.' A ULM Student's Powerful Message To Phil Robertson [View all]
kpete
Dec 2013
OP
This was posted on Free Republic also and the comments are exactly what we'd expect.
CurtEastPoint
Dec 2013
#4
As an educated person, Mr. Robertson knows he is a bigot. He has no excuse. nt
Bernardo de La Paz
Dec 2013
#18
Can we stop pretending (if we ever did) that that place is functionally distinct from Stormfront?
nomorenomore08
Dec 2013
#48
Oh, I didn't see it out on purpose. I googled the quote and it was a result so....
CurtEastPoint
Dec 2013
#56
A&E is happy as hell for the free PR and ratings at the expense of the glbt community. nt
msongs
Dec 2013
#5
Like I wrote earlier: I am a little less dumb every time I'm reading good stuff like this on DU.
marble falls
Dec 2013
#8
You and I have had our disagreements but I believe whole heartedly in that opinion. This site ....
marble falls
Dec 2013
#15
Something we all are doing, me, too. I think you and I are in sync on most stuff. I just stay away..
marble falls
Dec 2013
#23
Afraid I was too young at the time to know anything of the local talents...
TroglodyteScholar
Jan 2014
#67
well, that's just what's real: doesn't he know that Robertson's fears trump reality!
MisterP
Dec 2013
#37
Words cannot express, I can only hope these words never fade from sight.....;(
AuntPatsy
Dec 2013
#39
"When Christian fundamentalists are tied up to the back of pick-ups and dragged...
SunSeeker
Dec 2013
#43
I am trying so hard to be nice to my brother but he is another knuckle dragging
Maraya1969
Dec 2013
#44
That is the most poignant response I've heard so far. I greatly admire his courage.
gtar100
Dec 2013
#46
"I’ve never been under any impression that northeast Louisiana is safe for gays."
blkmusclmachine
Dec 2013
#51
And at the same time, the Phil Robertson's of the world will claim we don't need rights
Fearless
Dec 2013
#55