HomeLatest ThreadsGreatest ThreadsForums & GroupsMy SubscriptionsMy Posts
DU Home » Latest Threads » Forums & Groups » Main » General Discussion (Forum) » I used to be fat » Reply #69
In the discussion thread: I used to be fat [View all]

Response to MissMillie (Original post)

Sat Jan 11, 2014, 12:29 AM

69. I've lost 85 lbs. I mostly agree with you, with just a little qualification.

Certainly the fat jokes about Christie should go. It's his bullying approach to politics, and his Republican politics, that deserve the focus of our criticism. We all should be more sympathetic to how difficult weight issues can be.

On the other hand, I do think, if not taken to excess, a little bit of social pressure helps, as long as it's motivating, not too cruel or harshly shaming. I have never blamed others if they didn't find me physically attractive when I was fat. I don't find fat very attractive myself, and I'm not going to hold a hypocritical double standard. Chemistry is chemistry. People can't just will themselves into physical attraction for the sake of political correctness.

For my own case -- although I certainly don't hold everyone else to this standard -- my weight really is a matter of personal discipline and effort. My highest measured weight (it may have gone higher during some long, unmeasured spans of time) was 263 lbs, back in April 2012. For my height of 6', that's about 35.7 BMI -- so not as severe as you got, but still quite bad enough. I'm now 178 (BMI 24.1), and even though that's near the upper end of the "normal" BMI range, most people think I look not just normal, but skinny now.

I lost weight once before in the 90s, coming down from a then-top weight of maybe 245 (I never weighed myself until after I noticed I was losing weight), and I kept myself fit and trim for 7-8 years. Then I slowly let my fitness slide when life circumstances made it more difficult to stick with my diet and exercise routine.

For a while I just didn't care. I didn't feel like the first 10-20 pounds I regained was such a big deal. And when that didn't seem like a big deal, the next ten on top of that didn't seem like a big deal either. Eventually my excess weight started to bother me a little, but still not quite enough to get me exercising and eating better again. I had never been a "rah, rah, feel the burn!" exercise enthusiast. Exercise was never better than a dreary chore to be done as far as I was concerned, which made it tough to stick to it for as many years as I had once before, and even tougher to return to it. Fitness was a fond memory, but the process of staying fit was anything but.

And oddly enough, for as much as people often recommend exercise to battle depression, I suffered the worst episodes of depression in my life while I was fittest I'd ever been. This made me fear that I might be prone to exercised-induced depression (turns out there is such a thing), and, whether it was merely another rationalization for hating exercise or not, that factor only added to my reluctance to get back to exercise and better eating.

It took a series of little shocks, spread out over a few years, to make me resolve to lose weight again. One of the first shocks I remember was when I was given, as a Christmas present, a visit to an indoor skydiving session. It turns out that there was a top allowed weight of 250 lbs. On the skydiving center's scale, in my winter street clothes, I came out to 253. They let the few extra pounds slide. When I was in the skydiving chamber, even though I'd previously watched others flying all around through the air while I waited, I barely managed floating 2-3 feet above the floor.

Then there were growing twinges of knee pain. Finding myself pushing off on the arm of the sofa to get up. Having to give into buying jeans with a 40" waist (I'm now wearing 30"!), and then having those 40-inchers starting to get tight. Suddenly having to chase after an escaping cat, but feeling I was mired in molasses up to my thighs the moment I tried to run.

The final straw came when my wife bought a new bathroom scale. I stepped on it and saw 270! It turns out that the scale had to be calibrated first, but even when that was done, and I stepped on the scale buck naked, I was still getting 263, which was bad enough. I think seeing that first uncalibrated, clothes-on weight of 270 was a good thing for me, however, because I not sure a "mere" 263 would have been, of and by itself, quite as much shock as I needed.

The next day I began regular exercise, and greatly improved my diet. I've been at it ever since. I lost 50 lbs in six months -- just in time to meet my first goal of losing 50 before turning 50. I've been under 200 for a full year now. I've been at my current weight of 178 about six months.

Having lost a lot of weight now twice in my life, and that first time having kept it off for many years, and showing all the signs that I'll again keep it off for many years to come, I can't, for my own case, ever accept any excuses about my weight being some weird biological or medical thing beyond my control. For me, discipline matters. Not being lazy matters. If I regain the weight I've lost, I will consider that a personal failing, and I think rightly so.

This time around I dumped the low-fat diet I used during the 90s. I didn't suffer too much from hunger while losing weight this second go round, and I hardly ever feel myself going hungry now that I'm eating to maintain my current weight. I still don't love exercise in general, but I've found stuff to do that I at least find more tolerable, and a few activities (that I unfortunately can't do often enough to be my main source of exercise) I actually do enjoy. The bad depression I'd experienced in the 90s did not recur.

One reason I'm not as tough on others as I can be on myself, however, is that I know I've got advantages working for me that others won't have (a gym at work, a very short commute that frees up time, getting an appetite suppressing effect from exercise), and I also know, having done it myself once before, how easy it is to fall off the wagon.

Reply to this post

Back to OP Alert abuse Link to post in-thread

Always highlight: 10 newest replies | Replies posted after I mark a forum
Replies to this discussion thread
Arrow 116 replies Author Time Post
MissMillie Jan 2014 OP
QC Jan 2014 #1
phasma ex machina Jan 2014 #60
Mike Nelson Jan 2014 #2
PassingFair Jan 2014 #3
mahina Jan 2014 #4
MissMillie Jan 2014 #5
Gormy Cuss Jan 2014 #11
MissMillie Jan 2014 #13
classykaren Jan 2014 #77
auntAgonist Jan 2014 #86
beaglelover Jan 2014 #107
Catherine Vincent Jan 2014 #6
BlueState Jan 2014 #7
regnaD kciN Jan 2014 #72
BlueMTexpat Jan 2014 #79
BlancheSplanchnik Jan 2014 #96
redqueen Jan 2014 #8
Live and Learn Jan 2014 #9
Le Taz Hot Jan 2014 #10
HockeyMom Jan 2014 #12
Douglas Carpenter Jan 2014 #14
Marrah_G Jan 2014 #15
Dorian Gray Jan 2014 #16
chervilant Jan 2014 #17
classykaren Jan 2014 #78
catrose Jan 2014 #90
CaliforniaPeggy Jan 2014 #18
AAO Jan 2014 #19
angstlessk Jan 2014 #20
Tuesday Afternoon Jan 2014 #21
wryter2000 Jan 2014 #22
roguevalley Jan 2014 #23
Demo_Chris Jan 2014 #24
Beaverhausen Jan 2014 #25
MissMillie Jan 2014 #26
Barack_America Jan 2014 #27
MissMillie Jan 2014 #30
klook Jan 2014 #28
Sienna86 Jan 2014 #29
FatBuddy Jan 2014 #31
MissMillie Jan 2014 #33
FatBuddy Jan 2014 #37
pipi_k Jan 2014 #82
FatBuddy Jan 2014 #84
closeupready Jan 2014 #32
Shrike47 Jan 2014 #34
tom_kelly Jan 2014 #35
KamaAina Jan 2014 #36
Grateful for Hope Jan 2014 #88
Matariki Jan 2014 #38
KitSileya Jan 2014 #39
laundry_queen Jan 2014 #44
nolabear Jan 2014 #40
PasadenaTrudy Jan 2014 #41
ChiciB1 Jan 2014 #42
laundry_queen Jan 2014 #43
Grateful for Hope Jan 2014 #91
laundry_queen Jan 2014 #98
Grateful for Hope Jan 2014 #99
laundry_queen Jan 2014 #101
Grateful for Hope Jan 2014 #102
Grateful for Hope Jan 2014 #108
arthritisR_US Jan 2014 #45
Liberal_in_LA Jan 2014 #46
NCTraveler Jan 2014 #47
Skittles Jan 2014 #48
Spitfire of ATJ Jan 2014 #49
noamnety Jan 2014 #50
nomorenomore08 Jan 2014 #110
annabanana Jan 2014 #51
TBF Jan 2014 #52
awoke_in_2003 Jan 2014 #53
arcane1 Jan 2014 #54
KentuckyWoman Jan 2014 #55
mokawanis Jan 2014 #56
nadinbrzezinski Jan 2014 #57
HipChick Jan 2014 #58
Vashta Nerada Jan 2014 #59
nadinbrzezinski Jan 2014 #61
Vashta Nerada Jan 2014 #62
nadinbrzezinski Jan 2014 #65
BuddhaGirl Jan 2014 #95
La Lioness Priyanka Jan 2014 #64
Vashta Nerada Jan 2014 #66
wickerwoman Jan 2014 #73
nomorenomore08 Jan 2014 #111
Vashta Nerada Jan 2014 #112
nomorenomore08 Jan 2014 #113
Vashta Nerada Jan 2014 #114
nomorenomore08 Jan 2014 #115
BainsBane Jan 2014 #63
DeSwiss Jan 2014 #67
NYC_SKP Jan 2014 #68
LineReply I've lost 85 lbs. I mostly agree with you, with just a little qualification.
Silent3 Jan 2014 #69
liberal_at_heart Jan 2014 #70
merrily Jan 2014 #71
a la izquierda Jan 2014 #74
Post removed Jan 2014 #75
1StrongBlackMan Jan 2014 #76
cinnabonbon Jan 2014 #80
Android3.14 Jan 2014 #81
auntAgonist Jan 2014 #89
Android3.14 Jan 2014 #100
Grateful for Hope Jan 2014 #83
MillennialDem Jan 2014 #85
TexasBushwhacker Jan 2014 #94
MillennialDem Jan 2014 #97
auntAgonist Jan 2014 #87
B Calm Jan 2014 #92
packman Jan 2014 #93
Warpy Jan 2014 #103
Jamaal510 Jan 2014 #104
liberal_at_heart Jan 2014 #105
nadinbrzezinski Jan 2014 #109
Name removed Jan 2014 #106
burfman Feb 2014 #116
Please login to view edit histories.