General Discussion

pipi_k

(21,020 posts)

178. It's not about being

Wed Jan 15, 2014, 08:19 PM

Jan 2014

"shallow and self absorbed".

As I told someone else below, we are programmed to feel a visceral response to the sound of a crying baby.

A baby cries for what reason? Because it's in distress of some kind. To be immune to the distress cries of another human being is, IMO, the real loss of humanity.

Here is a link to an article that explains it.

http://www.theguardian.com/science/2012/oct/17/crying-babies-hard-ignore

If the publication is not acceptable for some reason, I suggest doing a google search for the science behind why many humans cannot tolerate the sound of a crying baby.

It's not shallow and self absorbed. It's biology.

Also, as I noted in that same post, there are people who have sensory processing disorders. Neurological defects. Those aren't selfish/self-absorbed either.

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sitter cancelled. couple took baby to $200 plus fancy pre.pay nonrefundable restaurant. [View all] Liberal_in_LA Jan 2014 OP

... mindwalker_i Jan 2014 #1

I've already tuckered myself out on this one... Chan790 Jan 2014 #2

If you need more butter I've got plenty! Initech Jan 2014 #31

Scooch over on the couch Aerows Jan 2014 #80

Regular, garlic, or movie theater? Initech Jan 2014 #86

Mmmm garlic, please! Aerows Jan 2014 #95

I think there can be restaurants (or at least times) when only adults are served... hlthe2b Jan 2014 #3

Children shouldn't be allowed in IHOP either. Hassin Bin Sober Jan 2014 #21

This is why I refuse to dine anywhere that doesn't have nude dancers. JVS Jan 2014 #146

This is win ;) JesterCS Jan 2014 #161

If This Restaurateur Was That Concerned For His Other Guests He Could Have..... global1 Jan 2014 #4

restaurant or couple would have been out $500. difficult choice Liberal_in_LA Jan 2014 #5

That restaurant is one of the hardest Dorian Gray Jan 2014 #17

The restaurant would not be out $500. Ms. Toad Jan 2014 #129

AH! So all one has to do to get their non-refundable deposit back is feign an absent sitter. KittyWampus Jan 2014 #89

This is dessert at Alinea: begin_within Jan 2014 #118

Already looks like the baby's crashed the tray into the middle of the table Paulie Jan 2014 #120

It's supposed to be art, that you can eat begin_within Jan 2014 #130

I think someone has already eaten it. n/t goldent Jan 2014 #137

And it didn't agree with them. n/t KansDem Jan 2014 #156

As a Mir� or Jackson Pollock, that would kick ass. Warren DeMontague Jan 2014 #153

"Babies cry. Fact of life." Yes, that is why the baby should have not been there in the first yellowcanine Jan 2014 #169

Look - It's A Matter Of Good Customer Service In My Mind..... global1 Jan 2014 #171

The owners have several avenues for folks to sell or trade their tickets. Glassunion Jan 2014 #174

I Guess We've Come To An Impass Here..... global1 Jan 2014 #179

In your opinion the restaurant should just eat the loss? Glassunion Jan 2014 #180

Granted, as a courtesy, yes. But the main fault still goes to the parents. yellowcanine Jan 2014 #184

Why on earth would you want to?? Even if your sitter cancelled. cali Jan 2014 #6

forfeiting $500 hard to accept, i guess Liberal_in_LA Jan 2014 #9

If they're they type of couple who can drop $500+ on dinner Blue_Tires Jan 2014 #16

Sold them for a profit possibly. Chan790 Jan 2014 #20

$3,000 on Valentine's Day?!?? Blue_Tires Jan 2014 #23

Why do you assume the man paid for the tickets Luminous Animal Jan 2014 #45

Just playing percentages...I suppose they could have been a married couple Blue_Tires Jan 2014 #48

So the only thing you can see MattBaggins Jan 2014 #76

especially Niceguy1 Jan 2014 #144

insulting and sexist assumptions. bettyellen Jan 2014 #181

It's probably not easy at the last minute. n/t pnwmom Jan 2014 #64

Most of the time, probably yeah OriginalGeek Jan 2014 #25

We now have smoke free restaurants...perhaps their should be designated child free zones.. VanillaRhapsody Jan 2014 #106

Perhaps, but OriginalGeek Jan 2014 #115

Yes...but we should be more supportive of the choice not to have children... VanillaRhapsody Jan 2014 #123

Absolutely OriginalGeek Jan 2014 #132

I'd rather take a chance with the baby than throw all that money away. n/t pnwmom Jan 2014 #62

But if you had tickets to the opera or a huge Broadway play, would you? PeaceNikki Jan 2014 #67

No, that's where I'd draw the line. pnwmom Jan 2014 #69

So the patrons of this establishment are not deserving of the same respect? PeaceNikki Jan 2014 #70

Where does it say the baby was screaming for several hours? n/t pnwmom Jan 2014 #71

OK, I stand corrected. It's a several hour long experience and the baby cried at least some of that PeaceNikki Jan 2014 #75

$200??? Wow! That place must be even fancier than the Olive Garden! QC Jan 2014 #7

Not possible! Squinch Jan 2014 #33

Well, they should have it, and it should be twice as big! goldent Jan 2014 #138

One can hope! QC Jan 2014 #162

"First world" problems 1000words Jan 2014 #8

Well that's true get the red out Jan 2014 #10

hey? did the kid have a ticket? n/t hollysmom Jan 2014 #11

They should have 4Q2u2 Jan 2014 #12

You indeed can "exchange" tickets at Alinea (if someone wants them) frazzled Jan 2014 #13

thanks for the background info Liberal_in_LA Jan 2014 #15

Very well said. redqueen Jan 2014 #24

My sentiments exactly! Well said!!!!!! nt MADem Jan 2014 #38

If I was going to spend tons on a meal, I'd go to MASA's here in NYC. I'm a sushi fan stevenleser Jan 2014 #68

I lived in Japan for 2 years... 3catwoman3 Jan 2014 #93

I'd have to have a ton of money to be willing to part with $1500 on dinner stevenleser Jan 2014 #107

Whoa, that is way 1%! frazzled Jan 2014 #97

Yes, it's hard to imagine those who can do this and not have to worry about the tab stevenleser Jan 2014 #154

It sucks for the parents of the baby but I think that avebury Jan 2014 #14

Yep. Give them the chance to dine another night. riqster Jan 2014 #18

+100 CFLDem Jan 2014 #22

It would cost the restaurant five hundred bucks. MADem Jan 2014 #41

That defeats the purpose of the ticket system frazzled Jan 2014 #42

This ^ PeaceNikki Jan 2014 #53

The price quoted in the article doesn't include the tip, but frazzled Jan 2014 #56

It's an interesting concept, for sure. PeaceNikki Jan 2014 #58

thanks for the education about this sort of restaurant. Really interesting. I bet the chef KittyWampus Jan 2014 #91

since i consider all of this a luxury, i just view it as a risk people take JI7 Jan 2014 #19

Gosh! I hope they survived starvation or the horrors of eating...well..just food. Tierra_y_Libertad Jan 2014 #26

I'm sure glad I don't have such problems. Buns_of_Fire Jan 2014 #27

This message was self-deleted by its author Rowdyboy Jan 2014 #28

too soon dlwickham Jan 2014 #32

Probably.... Rowdyboy Jan 2014 #34

if only more people would self delete on here dlwickham Jan 2014 #103

I've finally learned to think before I spout off in "real life" but its so easy to act like an ass Rowdyboy Jan 2014 #122

next time bring the kid to schwa AngryAmish Jan 2014 #29

Did the baby have a ticket? Xithras Jan 2014 #30

Bingo! nt MADem Jan 2014 #44

The baby can sit on a lap and drink a bottle. He shouldn't need a ticket. n/t pnwmom Jan 2014 #60

But it didn't. It screamed loud enough to heard in the kitchen. REP Jan 2014 #102

The restaurant had the option, which they chose not to exercise, pnwmom Jan 2014 #114

The baby is a human being. Tickets are per-person Xithras Jan 2014 #142

Buying/selling the tickets constituted a contract between the restaurant and the parents. pnwmom Jan 2014 #145

Yes, the restaurant and parents. Not the child. Xithras Jan 2014 #150

No, the restaurant clearly permitted 3 people to enter and only required tickets of the 2 pnwmom Jan 2014 #152

Oh, I agree with you on that point. Xithras Jan 2014 #165

Except if you were right there would be no difference between the laws of the states pnwmom Jan 2014 #167

Outside beverages? With no corking fee? JVS Jan 2014 #148

This situation is just crazy on every level, beginning with pre-paying for a restaurant. Squinch Jan 2014 #35

It's art. A performance and an experience. People pay that much for theater. PeaceNikki Jan 2014 #54

Give the tickets to friends, if they can't find someone to watch the kid. MADem Jan 2014 #36

I am a parent and I cannot manage such situations. Vattel Jan 2014 #37

If you can't afford a sitter you can't afford that restaurant. MADem Jan 2014 #47

If you don't want to be exposed to small humans, then eat at home. n/t pnwmom Jan 2014 #65

Sorry--I agree with the poster who says that if the price to eat at that restaurant MADem Jan 2014 #72

If you haven't trained your kids to not disturb the peace keep them home. alphafemale Jan 2014 #109

I once took a baby to an upscale restaurant, and the waiter was so taken pnwmom Jan 2014 #113

"I wonder how many people are whipping through the Taco Bell drive-thru at two a.m. because they're nomorenomore08 Jan 2014 #84

I think it's more about the "performance art" than the food. MADem Jan 2014 #87

yeah, I won't be dining there in the near future Vattel Jan 2014 #100

I'd do it if someone gave me a ticket, or invited me! MADem Jan 2014 #163

Never lived in that universe... hunter Jan 2014 #39

I never would have thought beachbum bob Jan 2014 #40

has anyone tried the food there ? JI7 Jan 2014 #43

In places like that, it's not so much "food" as "art"..."food" is merely the medium. Xithras Jan 2014 #49

yeah, i would rather spend on something like this than on jewelry, bags, shoes , JI7 Jan 2014 #147

No, but here are 2 videos frazzled Jan 2014 #50

It's art. A performance and an experience. People pay that much for theater. PeaceNikki Jan 2014 #55

Not there, but at Grant Achatz's other restaurant, Next. Chan790 Jan 2014 #92

Pretentious and craven seveneyes Jan 2014 #46

I would not eat in a place with "non-refundable tickets" Skittles Jan 2014 #51

There is no such thing as an "ill-behaved baby" demwing Jan 2014 #52

bingo reddread Jan 2014 #61

Yes, there are most certainly ill behaved parents. /nt demwing Jan 2014 #94

But there are such things as places where it is inappropriate to bring them. Egalitarian Thug Jan 2014 #73

Agreed. See my post #94 /nt demwing Jan 2014 #96

Yes, they do--and they don't need to be crying in the midst of theater performances, or MADem Jan 2014 #77

For something like that I'd have had a backup sitter on hand. n/t LadyHawkAZ Jan 2014 #57

Seriously. If you have a few hundred bucks tied into dinner, then letting the babysitter... JVS Jan 2014 #151

I could eat off the dollar menu for a long time on that kind of money dembotoz Jan 2014 #59

Well if it costs that much pipi_k Jan 2014 #63

^^^^THIS^^^^ Fumesucker Jan 2014 #131

OR, you could do what I do. Help the parents out by taking the kids for a walk. Luminous Animal Jan 2014 #149

I'm way past that stage, but I don't mind babies anywhere I go, whether in a restaurant pnwmom Jan 2014 #66

I love babies rebecca_herman Jan 2014 #78

In a movie, play, or show, a baby could interrupt the proceedings. I agree. pnwmom Jan 2014 #81

+100% /nt demwing Jan 2014 #99

you do realize that the cry of a human baby is SUPPOSED to be annoying, right? Scout Jan 2014 #164

And I've never seen parents in public NOT try to deal with their baby's cries, pnwmom Jan 2014 #176

still on that high horse i see LOL. Scout Jan 2014 #185

Everyone is missing the obvious. Glassunion Jan 2014 #74

Gaaaaaah!!!!!!!!!!! MADem Jan 2014 #79

Baby didn't belong there. They should have used the restaurant's FB to sell the tickets. n/t tammywammy Jan 2014 #82

The restaurant should have refunded the couple their ticket money at the door pnwmom Jan 2014 #83

Why should the business lose money because of patron's inability to plan? REP Jan 2014 #104

It was the restaurant's fault for not having a baby ban in place. pnwmom Jan 2014 #111

There are two concepts you are failing to grasp: Hassin Bin Sober Jan 2014 #110

There is a bigger concept you are failing to grasp. pnwmom Jan 2014 #112

"The owner did NOT have a baby plan in place" Hassin Bin Sober Jan 2014 #116

He should if he wants to. He will alienate some customers and please others, pnwmom Jan 2014 #119

I promise you. He isn't going to alienate any of his customers. Hassin Bin Sober Jan 2014 #136

When we had small children, we especially liked some ethnic restaurants. pnwmom Jan 2014 #140

I must be able to work in Olive Garden here somehow ... nt TBF Jan 2014 #85

If I'm dropping a couple hundred bucks for dinner. I expect a nice quiet dining experience. Glassunion Jan 2014 #88

No reflection on anyone here, but if I ever pay that much for a meal demwing Jan 2014 #98

yeah pretty much. neverforget Jan 2014 #108

Maybe some of them pipi_k Jan 2014 #127

if I ever become so shallow and self absorbed that the sound of a crying baby neverforget Jan 2014 #128

It's not about being pipi_k Jan 2014 #178

LOL pnwmom Jan 2014 #117

So having a very nice dinner out with your wife = part of the problem? Glassunion Jan 2014 #121

If you care about poor people, you must live like a monk/nun Nevernose Jan 2014 #124

Babies should NOT be allowed in fine dining restaurants. Vashta Nerada Jan 2014 #90

Sez You. Warren DeMontague Jan 2014 #135

Done that 30 years ago HockeyMom Jan 2014 #101

My opinion FreeJoe Jan 2014 #105

Don't have two good friends, but can eat at these prices? Coyotl Jan 2014 #125

It's the little people that make life worth living. Turbineguy Jan 2014 #126

Maybe to you. Others, like myself, couldn't care less about children. Gravitycollapse Jan 2014 #143

Im with you. bunnies Jan 2014 #166

"Kids in Restaurants Thread.... Okay, I'm going in!" Warren DeMontague Jan 2014 #133

There should be an age limit, and rules of conduct. Skip Intro Jan 2014 #134

Why do some people find it so hard to ignore/tune out others? ecstatic Jan 2014 #139

Baby crying vs someone texting? Yeah, that's comparable. yellowcanine Jan 2014 #170

Two reasons... pipi_k Jan 2014 #172

Hehe... Glassunion Jan 2014 #175

I'm sorry if you got the impression ecstatic Jan 2014 #182

They should have had their pit bull babysit or stayed home and ordered fried chicken. LeftyMom Jan 2014 #141

The restaurant should have explicit rules around it, if they think it will be a problem. Warren DeMontague Jan 2014 #155

Solution: Give the parents their food in "to go" containers. KansDem Jan 2014 #157

sorry, but if they sell NON REFUNDABLE tickets, then screw them. ejpoeta Jan 2014 #158

Or you could not buy a ticket if you don't like their policy. Travis_0004 Jan 2014 #183

If a meal cost me that much I shouldn't have to eat again for a month. hobbit709 Jan 2014 #159

I have an idea!!! ejpoeta Jan 2014 #160

Nahhh.... pipi_k Jan 2014 #173

That's really hard with how they operate. Glassunion Jan 2014 #177

These parents were thoughtless and careless. yellowcanine Jan 2014 #168

Hard for me to defend some rich couple blowing over $200 for a meal! B Calm Jan 2014 #186