General Discussion

kcr

(15,522 posts)

127. To clarify, I'm not arguing that there are never screw ups. Nothing is perfect.

Mon Jan 27, 2014, 02:51 PM

Jan 2014

I'm just not in the Child Support Isn't For the Children camp. And I tend to be highly skeptical of 99% of the anecdotes I read on message boards especially when it comes to child support. Many of them tend to be unbelievable, like stories of people being thrown in jail over minor issues or not knowing they were hugely in arrears. I don't blame friends and family for taking their loved one's side because people tend to do that, but looking at them objectively they just aren't that believable. And people will talk about the screw ups, but leave out the details where they contributed to the events that led to those screw ups. And I see all the people who just immediately bought the story of the guy thrown in jail for overpaying his child support! But when you learn the details that's not what happened at all. So you know they buy the stories of their friends the same way.

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Victim wants rapist's parental rights restricted [View all] Omaha Steve Jan 2014 OP

Disgusting, and it is preventing the woman from keeping boundaries in place..you know, Jefferson23 Jan 2014 #1

No woman should have to face her rapist or hand over her child to him. In_The_Wind Jan 2014 #2

This is unacceptable in so many ways cinnabonbon Jan 2014 #3

32 states give rapists parental rights wavesofeuphoria Jan 2014 #6

That is.... wow. cinnabonbon Jan 2014 #14

This isn't the first case. There have been several like it. nt okaawhatever Jan 2014 #34

That is patriarchy. That is rape culture. redqueen Jan 2014 #64

Where exactly is Lincoln, Iran? Dash87 Jan 2014 #4

Had she given the child up for adoption yellerpup Jan 2014 #5

good question another one along those lines, could he prevent the adoption leftyohiolib Jan 2014 #9

The answer is likely yes in most states...... Swede Atlanta Jan 2014 #17

If there aren't special condition for rape yellerpup Jan 2014 #42

the Kansas welfare department ordered the test dsc Jan 2014 #65

Thanks for that clarification. yellerpup Jan 2014 #115

He has sued himself dsc Jan 2014 #138

Too frightening to contemplate. yellerpup Jan 2014 #44

Great points! ybbor Jan 2014 #18

Welcome to DU! yellerpup Jan 2014 #43

Thanks ybbor Jan 2014 #90

Insanity. nt Demo_Chris Jan 2014 #7

What rape culture? What war on women? Nope, nope, hysterical women are just making those up, Squinch Jan 2014 #8

Hard to believe that anybody anywhere would find this acceptable ... etherealtruth Jan 2014 #12

Some more from that article... theHandpuppet Jan 2014 #16

Tampering with evidence? davidpdx Jan 2014 #103

Question 90-percent Jan 2014 #10

Welcome to the world. No. Rapists usually are not in jail. See Steubenville, Squinch Jan 2014 #13

+10000000000 redqueen Jan 2014 #67

That's what often happens gollygee Jan 2014 #19

how often does a rapist do 20 years? Rarely. bettyellen Jan 2014 #27

I've found that when people rape children, particularly boys, the sentencing is much harsher. nt justiceischeap Jan 2014 #32

absolutely- although there has been more victim blaming lately toward young girls bettyellen Jan 2014 #33

A quick Google news search reveals many, many long rape sentences. Comrade Grumpy Jan 2014 #38

Why would you want to obfuscate the truth about rape sentencing? Avg time served is is 5 1/2 years. bettyellen Jan 2014 #39

I did exactly what I said I did, a Google news search for "rape sentence." Comrade Grumpy Jan 2014 #41

and gave us deceptive information about jail time for rape? pulling a list off google tells us bettyellen Jan 2014 #46

Then you should likewise toss out the "rape" cases of 18-year-olds having sex with 15-year-olds El_Johns Jan 2014 #51

look at his list with facts of the crimes added�� there is no consent going on anywhere, and if you bettyellen Jan 2014 #53

Statutory rape = rape under the law. El_Johns Jan 2014 #57

yeah, and if you disagree with the current laws in various states, go for it- but this is a DERAIL bettyellen Jan 2014 #61

Statutory rape is part of those statistics. You want to take out the ones that involve serious El_Johns Jan 2014 #62

since you haven't "figured out" what prototypical "rape" actually IS, I am out of here, and YOU bettyellen Jan 2014 #63

I haven't figured out what *your* prototypical rape case is. El_Johns Jan 2014 #75

life was ONLY given for having three felony convictions�. scraping the bottom of the barrel to TRY bettyellen Jan 2014 #78

Still trying to whittle away to what *your* prototypical rape case is... El_Johns Jan 2014 #84

the context is sentencing for raping women- not minors, not kidnapping, not "three strikes" felony bettyellen Jan 2014 #86

I didn't mention the Innocence Project because the Innocence of the men who got life sentences El_Johns Jan 2014 #88

I define rape as the law does. It was you who felt adding kidnapping charges was no biggie, LOL. bettyellen Jan 2014 #91

You said rapists don't get life sentences. They do. You also complained because the average El_Johns Jan 2014 #92

Not if it's only a rape charge, nope. Kidnapping can only be a few feet because that's bettyellen Jan 2014 #93

Is raping someone in a house or car worse than raping them in the bushes? Worse to the El_Johns Jan 2014 #95

The criminal sentences you cited were NOT for rape... bettyellen Jan 2014 #100

Uh, yes, they were. You can accuse me of all the made-up stuff you want; it's because El_Johns Jan 2014 #105

Are you familiar with this field called 'statistics?' geek tragedy Jan 2014 #50

look below you, his "list" is bullshit. anything over 7 years had additional charges that show up in bettyellen Jan 2014 #54

"Statistics," you say? Comrade Grumpy Jan 2014 #107

The question was whether they frequently serve 20 years. geek tragedy Jan 2014 #111

god forbid anyone stay in the context of the thread- instead of derail with examples of bettyellen Jan 2014 #125

I did google mercuryblues Jan 2014 #132

I got almost the same list- all very short term sentences. bettyellen Jan 2014 #146

every crime you listed to refute me was NOT MERELY RAPE. Wow, it takes a lot of nerve to pretend bettyellen Jan 2014 #52

I said I did a Google news search for "rape sentence" and that was the result. Comrade Grumpy Jan 2014 #106

No, the words kidnapping and minor were in all the summaries. bettyellen Jan 2014 #108

Andrew Luster, Max Factor heir OwnedByCats Jan 2014 #114

Yeah, it takes multiple felonies. Has absolutely nothing to do with the context of this thread... bettyellen Jan 2014 #123

I was on your side OwnedByCats Jan 2014 #141

And I was agreeing, and never "attacked you". my post said nothing about you. bettyellen Jan 2014 #145

Sounded very OwnedByCats Jan 2014 #148

Thanks- was not meant to be sarcastic at all bettyellen Jan 2014 #149

No problem OwnedByCats Jan 2014 #150

Perhaps those results show up in the search results Revanchist Jan 2014 #74

how about providing the actual links to those sentences. that would be helpful to know axactly niyad Jan 2014 #76

I googled for him, they all include minors, kidnapping or are bettyellen Jan 2014 #94

and I thank you for going into that cesspool for us. knew there was a lot more involved than niyad Jan 2014 #97

It turned into a cesspool- now it's unfair to charge someone with kidnapping.... bettyellen Jan 2014 #102

Or when the rapist is nonwhite, and the victim is white. redqueen Jan 2014 #66

good point those sentences will be longer! but look at this list I was given as a sampling of bettyellen Jan 2014 #71

I don't live very far from that incident that happened in Syracuse OwnedByCats Jan 2014 #116

I don't think the late George Orwell could dream of the scenario this woman faces. kairos12 Jan 2014 #11

Sometimes there simply are no words... theHandpuppet Jan 2014 #15

"make it more difficult"??? there should be NO WAY a rapist should EVER have "parental rights" niyad Jan 2014 #20

Out curiosity, how do you feel about a case like this? NobodyHere Jan 2014 #59

What about that poster's post made you curious to ask that? n/t kcr Jan 2014 #79

The courts are fucked up about this, and it's just more proof. bettyellen Jan 2014 #109

Well this is a good reason to have an abortion if you get raped. gollygee Jan 2014 #21

That would be my advice at this point to any women in my family. It's bad enough... stevenleser Jan 2014 #24

don't forget that some woman-hating fool in nm is trying to make it a crime to have an abortion niyad Jan 2014 #80

A conviction for sexual assault that results in a birth should terminate parental rights stevenleser Jan 2014 #22

I like that idea davidpdx Jan 2014 #104

So continuing and state-required rape is the law? mbperrin Jan 2014 #23

Ummm NobodyHere Jan 2014 #58

I suppose some case for simple biological similarities, DNA, and the like mbperrin Jan 2014 #68

That "judge" needs to go! What a mockery of justice that asshole is. L0oniX Jan 2014 #25

Then doesn't this also mean a Victim can't sue for child support? Heather MC Jan 2014 #26

Yes. lumberjack_jeff Jan 2014 #29

It would be so much easier if there were no rapist Heather MC Jan 2014 #30

Nebraska is proposing removing rights, but still requiring child support. tammywammy Jan 2014 #35

Termination of parental rights alone in most states does not end the obligation of child support n/t kcr Jan 2014 #83

Not necessarily. Jim Lane Jan 2014 #112

"Child support is for the benefit of the child" Not really Heather MC Jan 2014 #117

Yes, really kcr Jan 2014 #118

Let me tell you what happened to people I know and stories I have read Heather MC Jan 2014 #119

Sorry. kcr Jan 2014 #120

I never said Abolish Child Support, but it is a hot mess Heather MC Jan 2014 #121

I'd believe it kcr Jan 2014 #122

I think you're both right. Jim Lane Jan 2014 #126

To clarify, I'm not arguing that there are never screw ups. Nothing is perfect. kcr Jan 2014 #127

A friend of mine took custody of his kid, but didn't want to pay to remove child support joeglow3 Jan 2014 #128

What would the value of removing child support kcr Jan 2014 #129

It shows lack of commone sense in much of government joeglow3 Jan 2014 #130

I thought you said he didn't want to pay to remove it? kcr Jan 2014 #131

Here is the story joeglow3 Jan 2014 #134

Well, no. I'm sorry kcr Jan 2014 #135

BOTH parties contacted the state and had notarized statements joeglow3 Jan 2014 #136

Your contention is they couldn't afford to go to court and get it sorted out. kcr Jan 2014 #137

I agree. It shouldn't. joeglow3 Jan 2014 #144

No, I'm telling you, there's no reason it would cost thousands of dollars. kcr Jan 2014 #147

They let a sex offender share the child? tblue Jan 2014 #28

You nailed it! You win the thread. n/t freshwest Jan 2014 #40

THANK YOU! DeadLetterOffice Jan 2014 #60

This is a complex issue. Rape is a horrible crime and can lead to all sorts of trauma Dustlawyer Jan 2014 #31

Not complex for rational people. False rape convictions are more rare than deaths by lightning. geek tragedy Jan 2014 #48

that isn't even remotely close to being true dsc Jan 2014 #72

Only 1/750,000 sexual acts results geek tragedy Jan 2014 #82

that is an absurd way to look at it dsc Jan 2014 #85

1000 per year, accusations not convictions. geek tragedy Jan 2014 #96

you are moving the goalposts here dsc Jan 2014 #139

Well, we moved the goal posts when moving from geek tragedy Jan 2014 #140

I think if you are going to lecture people about statistics dsc Jan 2014 #142

which comparison do you want? geek tragedy Jan 2014 #143

If he thinks he's innocent, which he very likely is not, he can appeal the conviction. Gravitycollapse Jan 2014 #56

You said it well. mbperrin Jan 2014 #70

On what planet is it in a child's best interest to hang out with her mother's rapist? LeftyMom Jan 2014 #69

false convictions are a totally different issue- and one you should advocate for- ELSEWHERE. bettyellen Jan 2014 #73

What a stupid fucking judge! Enthusiast Jan 2014 #36

Or a judge who was forced to apply the law as written. Igel Jan 2014 #37

the judge has discretion based on the best interests of the child. geek tragedy Jan 2014 #49

If republicans have their way... mstinamotorcity2 Jan 2014 #45

why is this an issue in the first place ? JI7 Jan 2014 #47

Why would they support her? She doesn't have a fetus anymore. nt valerief Jan 2014 #55

A disgusting misapplication of judicial disgression. blackspade Jan 2014 #77

Get this... Winning1 Jan 2014 #81

welcome to du niyad Jan 2014 #98

Thank you, Winning1 Feb 2014 #151

sorry to offend, but DonCoquixote Jan 2014 #87

"the handmaid's tale" is almost here. niyad Jan 2014 #99

I don't care if your pro-life or not, 1awake Jan 2014 #89

A rapist should have no parental rights RainDog Jan 2014 #101

Nebraska, like most states, doesn't have a law stripping those rights. Xithras Jan 2014 #110

Your post makes most sense goldent Jan 2014 #124

They do in cases of first degree sexual assault, if the article is correct. sl8 Jan 2014 #133

Totally disgusting OwnedByCats Jan 2014 #113