I dare to write about: Men and Women Today

[BellaKos]

323. Harmony Blue

Last edited Thu Feb 13, 2014, 08:36 AM - Edit history (1)

Thanks so much for your remarks. I think that observations relating to one's experience are valuable in a discussion about gender roles because the entire issue concerning the sexes and sexism is complicated, nuanced, and ever-evolving.

I've noticed many of the same things as you have, by the way. Younger men are not as confined by gender roles as men used to be. And intelligent, educated men do seek to form relationships between equals. And most men have *those butterflies* you mentioned at the onset of a first date -- to the same extent as most women do, too.

Maybe this relates to what you're talking about?
My mother was a great beauty in her youth. The little boys I knew when I was a child would gather around me to talk about how beautiful she was each time she showed up at my elementary school. Every shop -- gas station -- etc. where we were together, men would notice -- which I noticed even as a child. She would spend an hour getting dressed and putting on make-up each day before work. And she would brag about men telling her that they would give everything they owned for an hour of her time. (Of course, as a child, I didn't know what she was talking about. lol) But she did have a career, albeit within the confines of a "man's world." Some time in the 1970s, I remember that one time when she was asked to give a speech on the Equal Rights Amendment, she called to ask me what in the world that was.

I watched as she grew older clinging to the beauty that couldn't possibly be replicated as she approached sixty. Every make-up product and beauty remedy was tried. But the sad thing was that she still had the myopic view of the world that she had had when she asked me what the ERA was. She still thought that batting her eyes and swinging her hips was the best method to getting attention -- as it had served her so well in decades past. All along, I had hoped that one day she would cultivate wider interests and focus on broadening her intellectual horizons -- just as you suggested. Because, beauty does fade. And women are far, far more than the beauty that's on the outside. And so are men.