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gollygee

(22,336 posts)

88. Yes, because that's how society is set up

Wed Apr 2, 2014, 07:46 AM

Apr 2014

which also isn't their fault. They're told on one hand to dress in a way that is attractive to boys, but on the other hand that they have to cover themselves because boys are so terribly distraught if they get an erection, and that's the girls' fault. (Look at some of the posts on this thread.)

It creates a really unhealthy situation for girls where they are constantly watching themselves to make sure they're attractive to boys, and at the same time to make sure they're not TOO attractive to boys. Boys don't self-police like this. It takes enough mental energy to take away from the things they should be concentrating on at school, and it's all on the girls. The girls take their mental energy away from school and on clothing so the boys' mental energy is saved for school.

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Do school dress codes unfairly target girls? [View all] davidn3600 Apr 2014 OP

Is water wet? n/t Tansy_Gold Apr 2014 #1

^^^^^^This! Buckets full^^^^^ Walk away Apr 2014 #130

I agree. Warpy Apr 2014 #2

Well put. n/t TDale313 Apr 2014 #4

It seems their dress code is reasonable pipoman Apr 2014 #3

not if applied equally whatthehey Apr 2014 #5

The only answer mainstreetonce Apr 2014 #6

Had those in Public School in Florida HockeyMom Apr 2014 #8

Pants should be the choice mainstreetonce Apr 2014 #14

fingertip Niceguy1 Apr 2014 #7

I froze my ass off for years. Manifestor_of_Light Apr 2014 #9

I remember that. CrispyQ Apr 2014 #11

Ironically, I had the opposite problem when I lived in a swamp Nevernose Apr 2014 #26

had the same issue belcffub Apr 2014 #44

I remember no pants for girls. amandabeech Apr 2014 #27

Yeah and in our school when they allowed girls to wear slacks csziggy Apr 2014 #51

When I was a sophomore in high school, they first started madmom Apr 2014 #109

I think there's a whole lot of stupidity pipi_k Apr 2014 #10

Thread winner... pipoman Apr 2014 #16

It also isn't fair gollygee Apr 2014 #18

I just knew pipi_k Apr 2014 #38

have you ever been around middle school boys. lordy, what you are making it out to be, IT IS NOT. seabeyond Apr 2014 #54

The dress code at the school pipoman Apr 2014 #107

My opinion gollygee Apr 2014 #138

We don't disagree on post 17... pipoman Apr 2014 #141

No gollygee Apr 2014 #147

I read the post as justification for the dress code which is developed pipoman Apr 2014 #149

The dress code in many schools gollygee Apr 2014 #150

No argument here. . pipoman Apr 2014 #151

that little cutie in the front row could be clothed from head to toe and that newcriminal Apr 2014 #19

Exactly... pipi_k Apr 2014 #39

This message was self-deleted by its author Tuesday Afternoon Apr 2014 #169

my sons had no hardship at all going thru middle school with the cuties, nor did their friends. seabeyond Apr 2014 #58

And the little cutie could be just as distracted by the boys gollygee Apr 2014 #90

this is what pisses me off. and this is where it starts. and continues forever. wtf, .... seabeyond Apr 2014 #108

I think you're overstating some posters' positions, Seabeyond Scootaloo Apr 2014 #131

first, yes, police. i chose the word pipi used below. school police girls for the po boys. seabeyond Apr 2014 #133

Ironic given this is what you actually said on December 16, 2013. And I quote: Gravitycollapse Apr 2014 #22

good catch Liberal_in_LA Apr 2014 #33

I find it equally disturbing that you can pull up comments from six months ago... Earth_First Apr 2014 #35

It took me about 30 seconds to google the poster's name at the top of this site. Gravitycollapse Apr 2014 #37

Magic? Earth_First Apr 2014 #40

Yep, in the same way that knowing you like Grateful Dead means I'm stalking you. Gravitycollapse Apr 2014 #41

Accessing easily found information is stalking? HangOnKids Apr 2014 #128

It's not the pipi_k Apr 2014 #137

I'd call it brilliant pippi HangOnKids Apr 2014 #152

Wow I feel so special now... pipi_k Apr 2014 #155

Me too pipi_k Apr 2014 #50

Don't know what you're pipi_k Apr 2014 #42

It took me literally 30 seconds to google your name with "rape culture" to find that. Gravitycollapse Apr 2014 #47

You call mine "hypocrisy" pipi_k Apr 2014 #52

Some posters are not only creepy, but obnoxious. Sorry. Comrade Grumpy Apr 2014 #115

I'd go with creeped out Dorian Gray Apr 2014 #81

Creeped out is the correct response. Note, I don't agree with you on this issue however... Demo_Chris Apr 2014 #102

Actually, we don't disagree pipi_k Apr 2014 #106

in this case, the poster is referring to pubescent teenage boys. Not grown men with more fully KittyWampus Apr 2014 #68

Ah, so only young men are uncontrollable, brainless beasts. Gravitycollapse Apr 2014 #69

Does Dorian Gray Apr 2014 #83

Men aren't the same as boys mythology Apr 2014 #95

Trust me, speaking as a former 14 year old boy..... A HERETIC I AM Apr 2014 #25

You realize this forum isn't for you to wax poetic about your 14 year old hard-ons, right? Gravitycollapse Apr 2014 #28

Is that considered waxing poetic? A HERETIC I AM Apr 2014 #32

You are The Man, my man. n/t cherokeeprogressive Apr 2014 #34

No, that would be "dolphin waxing" Throd Apr 2014 #46

Well... pipi_k Apr 2014 #49

"...boys who, because of their inexperience, don't know how to deal with what happens..." Gravitycollapse Apr 2014 #55

both boys and girls have dealt with this from beginning of time. nipple, penis. seabeyond Apr 2014 #56

We need to discuss it because people like the poster we're responding to exist. Gravitycollapse Apr 2014 #59

and THAT... is the whole issue i swear we are dealing with today. i was a competitive swimmer seabeyond Apr 2014 #62

Oh no CFLDem Apr 2014 #74

Are you serious? pipi_k Apr 2014 #99

As a male who went through those lovely teenage years of inconvenient erections Arcanetrance Apr 2014 #111

And I won't disagree with you, but... pipi_k Apr 2014 #114

You are arguing that girls should have to dress a certain way for boys... Gravitycollapse Apr 2014 #136

yes. all of it. it is offensive to all of us, one way or another. except those men that need to seabeyond Apr 2014 #139

Again.... pipi_k Apr 2014 #143

They are pseudo-spontaneous. Gravitycollapse Apr 2014 #116

So you do realize that pipi_k Apr 2014 #124

Pseudo spontaneous would be something which appears to be spontaneous... Gravitycollapse Apr 2014 #126

Actually, the more I think of this.... pipi_k Apr 2014 #134

Serious question: Is English your second language? Gravitycollapse Apr 2014 #135

Tis not I pipi_k Apr 2014 #140

You needed google to understand what "pseudo-spontaneous" means? Gravitycollapse Apr 2014 #142

Yeah, well... pipi_k Apr 2014 #144

Saying I made it up is saying that pseudo and spontaneous were not words before I wrote them. Gravitycollapse Apr 2014 #146

As I said... pipi_k Apr 2014 #154

"Non-spontaneous" and "pseudo-spontaneous" describe two different conditions. Gravitycollapse Apr 2014 #156

WTF? pipi_k Apr 2014 #157

Actually, you know what.... pipi_k Apr 2014 #158

Neither age nor gender are essential indicators of intellect or ability. Gravitycollapse Apr 2014 #159

Alas!!! pipi_k Apr 2014 #167

wow seabeyond Apr 2014 #168

Teenage girls are dealing with new hormones too gollygee Apr 2014 #85

Of course they are pipi_k Apr 2014 #98

"Which is why the school must do it for them." the school MUST police the girls to protect the boys seabeyond Apr 2014 #104

Exactly!! pipi_k Apr 2014 #45

first... you suggesting rules for girls to not distract boys? and ya, i have two sons seabeyond Apr 2014 #48

Isn't that a better argument for changing the boys' dress code? LeftyMom Apr 2014 #61

Why? pipi_k Apr 2014 #100

You're saying 'boys' bodies are a problem so girls need to change clothes'. LeftyMom Apr 2014 #110

Sigh... pipi_k Apr 2014 #112

how the bloody hell can a GIRL concentrate when she is assaulted multiple times a day by hormones. seabeyond Apr 2014 #117

I suppose they manage the same way girls do. LeftyMom Apr 2014 #123

There's a big difference pipi_k Apr 2014 #125

And you'll never guess what this subthread started... TreasonousBastard Apr 2014 #65

This is painfully heterosexist. MadrasT Apr 2014 #91

Here's the deal... pipi_k Apr 2014 #103

you might ask all the men here if they needed school to help them with their erections seabeyond Apr 2014 #105

Well said. Two things drove me mad at that age LittleBlue Apr 2014 #113

without being able to do anything about it.... fuck. just fuck. seabeyond Apr 2014 #118

You can't walk away and you can't wank in class LittleBlue Apr 2014 #120

And you know dude.... We were ALL there. Big fug gin' deal. Oh wait.... We have SOME men seabeyond Apr 2014 #122

I have both a son and a daughter... Whiskeytide Apr 2014 #12

Is a better question "how often do school dress codes unfairly target girls"? Donald Ian Rankin Apr 2014 #13

When I was in HS in the late 60's girls couldn't wear pants of any kind, guys could wear shorts... Tikki Apr 2014 #15

I don't mind dress codes depending on how they're worded gollygee Apr 2014 #17

Our school has a dress regulations Nevernose Apr 2014 #30

some do but many don't dsc Apr 2014 #20

This reminds me of when I was a teenager. Blue_In_AK Apr 2014 #21

Floor kneel and two inches. amandabeech Apr 2014 #31

I remember doing the same in the early 80s LadyHawkAZ Apr 2014 #71

The boys at my Catholic HS were scrutnized as well as we were. blueamy66 Apr 2014 #78

Usually the opposite. Chan790 Apr 2014 #23

Most schools don't have uniforms like that gollygee Apr 2014 #24

That sounds fair to me. blueamy66 Apr 2014 #79

Some of it is fair gollygee Apr 2014 #84

But don't you think that girls dress more provocatively than boys, as a rule? blueamy66 Apr 2014 #86

Yes, because that's how society is set up gollygee Apr 2014 #88

Or, they could have parents who are capable of teaching them some common sense. DebJ Apr 2014 #89

I'm talking about how the dress code is worded gollygee Apr 2014 #92

I agree. As I said above, the focus should be on learning to value yourself as a whole person, DebJ Apr 2014 #93

I agree totally. blueamy66 Apr 2014 #97

Burqas all around because clearly its the girls' fault boys can't control themselves. alarimer Apr 2014 #29

I wonder if the dress code requires the boys to pull thier pants up. rrneck Apr 2014 #36

That was exactly the thinking back in the 1960s. DebJ Apr 2014 #94

In my unairconditioned high school in Georgia MNBrewer Apr 2014 #43

If boys, but not girls, are allowed to wear leggings with nothing on top, then yes, that is unfair. Nye Bevan Apr 2014 #53

I think girls today face a Catch-22: Maedhros Apr 2014 #57

Women are subject to an endless bombardment of double binds. Gravitycollapse Apr 2014 #60

"fragile victim" vs "indestructible warrior" is another. (nt) Orrex Apr 2014 #132

And fascinating that this typical view completely leaves out parental intervention. DebJ Apr 2014 #96

you are so right on. so obvious. a given. and you are so right on. none of this stuff seabeyond Apr 2014 #119

yes. duh. derp and the end. Tuesday Afternoon Apr 2014 #63

I think everyone at school (boys and girls) should be fully covered up Sarah Ibarruri Apr 2014 #64

Speaking from personal experience, it unfairly targets the poor families the most... Ghost in the Machine Apr 2014 #66

Exactly. I ran into the same thing in a school for boys. seabeyond Apr 2014 #67

"but I was also with the voice of those that could not afford." Same thing here... Ghost in the Machine Apr 2014 #70

Why would you have to buy 2 sets of clothes? blueamy66 Apr 2014 #73

I find it to be the total opposite. blueamy66 Apr 2014 #72

Got here before me! Yes, I have found the same thing Ilsa Apr 2014 #101

"So a parent has to buy 2 or 3 pair of slacks and 2 or 3 polo shirts at Target, JCPenney or WalMart" Ghost in the Machine Apr 2014 #176

Thank you, but I don't need to "have things cleared up". blueamy66 Apr 2014 #180

Wow, a whole MONTH!! I guess that makes you an expert on small town, rural living, huh? Ghost in the Machine Apr 2014 #181

I could only stomach the place for a month. It was a huge Republican town. blueamy66 Apr 2014 #182

Yes it's tough being a Liberal in a republicon town, but I do know a few others... Ghost in the Machine Apr 2014 #184

You'd be surprised by how many people gollygee Apr 2014 #177

Hand me downs. My boys had four older nephews. I didn't even buy boys a coat until seabeyond Apr 2014 #178

Agree rudolph the red Apr 2014 #121

We have a dress code at our school and I think it's the boys that are treated unfairly My Good Babushka Apr 2014 #75

YES! aquart Apr 2014 #76

Leggings (used to be called "tights") aren't meant as stand-alone attire. WinkyDink Apr 2014 #77

Leggings and tights aren't the same thing gollygee Apr 2014 #87

I'm showing my age, heh, (though I'm from the mini-skirt era!). Just don't call them "jeggings"! WinkyDink Apr 2014 #161

I wear leggings all the time! Dorian Gray Apr 2014 #80

63 years old and I can still remember 7th grade English with Nancy E. sitting in a mini skirt B Calm Apr 2014 #82

Make school dress codes the same for each gender... Mike Nelson Apr 2014 #127

Hmmm... pipi_k Apr 2014 #165

"Underwear must not be worn as outerwear." smokey nj Apr 2014 #129

School dress codes unfairly target everyone, actually. Ken Burch Apr 2014 #145

I respectfully disagree, big time blueamy66 Apr 2014 #163

That's pretty much pipi_k Apr 2014 #164

Yikes. That's Quite A Reach ProfessorGAC Apr 2014 #170

The fact that it may distract boys is a stupid rationale, but... Hippo_Tron Apr 2014 #148

Often, they do. Jamastiene Apr 2014 #153

#firstworldproblems Violet_Crumble Apr 2014 #160

ya. this one. i am tired of this little meme also. a woman raped from childhood on and accused seabeyond Apr 2014 #166

WTF? I've never said rape or hunger is a first world problem Violet_Crumble Apr 2014 #175

That dress code doesn't seem very restrictive. tammywammy Apr 2014 #173

They are lucky Jeneral2885 Apr 2014 #162

I actually wish we had school uniforms here. Arugula Latte Apr 2014 #171

As a kid... pipi_k Apr 2014 #172

Yes. I went to high school in a very affluent school Arugula Latte Apr 2014 #174

I remember how hard we fought in high school... idendoit Apr 2014 #179

And boys! KamaAina Apr 2014 #183